How It Happens
by JP5683
Summary: COMPLETED. Final Author's Note added 5/8. Lizzie and Gordo are forced to deal with feelings, friends, and each other. Starts back at Christmas goes to... ? First fanfic here, feedback appreciated.
1. Author's Note

** Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters from Lizzie McGuire, and do not have any connections with Disney. **

Summary- I stink at summaries. This starts at Christmas… Feelings that have been hidden threaten to come to the surface, and neither Lizzie nor Gordo knows what to do. 

Email JP5683@webtv.net or JP5683@msn.com or use either addy to IM me via MSN. 

Author's Note 

  


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This is my first attempt at fanfic since a 9th grade spelling assignment and that was just dumb. But I love fanfiction.net, so after a 12 year hiatus, I'm trying to do fanfic again. Yeah, I'm 26, out of the normal range for Lizzie fans, but it reminds me so much of Jr. High… 

I didn't think I was qualified enough to write a Lizzie story, since I still havent seen all of season one, but I felt I had to try. I have watched Lizzie McGuire since its debut, but I've actually only been a regular viewer since January 03. 

I've used references to several previous events, but even the most casual viewer should be able to get into my story. 

Big thanks go out to theRealXenocide (if you haven't, read his story) and all of the excellent authors here. Big props also to the members of Hilarydufffans@yahoogroups, especially but not limited to, Sally and Chris P. Also to the members of the LM message board at TVTome. Thanks for putting up with all my lame questions and remarks… 

I tried to make this original, add some things that others hadn't, but...I don't know... Maybe I shouldn't have written the bulk of this after 2 AM! LOL… 

I'm giving this story a PG rating, I almost went PG-13, decided against it, but couldn't go G. 

This IS an L/G G/L story, and at the same time, it's not. If you are reading this note for the first time, please have an open mind. Everything will be explained as I go along. I have nothing against the way the show portrays the characters, I just thought maybe there is more to it. 

Parts of this story are rewrites of episodes, but the rest is my twisted imagination. 

I was a 14 year old boy not long ago, so I thought it would be easy to write Gordo's side… it's harder than I thought… 

This was written out on paper before I ever posted it, but I added much to it. I felt if I didn't have it all written before I started to post, I might never finish it. 

There are plenty of songs included here, but I don't consider it to be a songfic. Some are just mentioned by title, or are used for select lyrics. I will include a complete list of songs used, at the end. If you want full lyrics, look online, or email me. 

There is no "Toon Lizzie" in my story, sorry, I think it works on film, not so well on paper. It's my story, deal with it… 

Review if you will, but if you don't want your comments displayed for others to see, send them to JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

All comments welcome, good or bad, I did not hold chapters hostage due to unfavorable comments or lack of reviews. 

For the most part, I left my original notes to each chapter intact, in some, I was referring to reviews and emails, others just thought I should post. 

Thanks for your time, now on to Chapter 1. 

March 1, 2003 


	2. An Unconventional Christmas Morning

** Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters of Lizzie McGuire, nor do I have any connections with Disney… **

Chapter 1 

An Unconventional Christmas Morning 

  


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"Lizzie!! 

"Mmmmmgggghhh". She was having a wonderful dream. She was getting married to Ethan Craft. The pastor had just said the part, "If anyone here has a reason why these two should not be married. Let them speak now, or forever hold their peace." 

The church was dead silent for about two beats, then came a voice from the back… "NOOOOOO! You CAN'T marry them!" 

Lizzie spun around, astonished at Gordo's outburst. She knew Gordo thought Ethan was an airhead, but he hadn't said much when Ethan had finally started to notice her, then they started to date, then got engaged, and now here they were… 

"You CAN'T get married to Ethan, Lizzie!", Gordo screamed… "At least, let me tell you something first…" He was trying to calm himself down… "Lizzie, I... I..." 

"LIZZIE!!!! How many times do I have to call you before you get up? Now you forced me to use force!!!! And with that remark, Jo McGuire yanked the covers off her daughter… 

"MOM! It's FREEZING!" Lizzie reached for the covers and yanked them up to her neck… 

"It is NOT freezing, it's almost noon, and I don't care if there is no school today, you're going to get up! It's Christmas Day and if you want to see your friends, you better get moving now, because you are spending the evening with your family!" 

"Awww, Mom! You just interrupted the best dream I ever had. At least it started that way… I was getting married to Ethan, then Gordo popped up and stopped everything! He said he had something important to tell me, but I didn't find out what because you woke me up! Ahhhh!" She threw off her covers, and reached for her favorite stuffed friend, Mr. Snuggles. 

"That's what you get for staying up until 3 am, watching Christmas movies, and pigging out on junk food! And, what's this about Ethan? I thought you moved on from him after that whole golf thing didn't work?" 

Lizzie didn't know what to say, she looked down at the floor… 

"Maybe Gordo was trying to tell you…" her mother stopped, unable to complete the sentence… 

"What Mom?" 

"N-nevermind, honey, that's the way dreams are sometimes, they start out one way, and get weird, and we can't understand why. Now, get up, get dressed, and come downstairs for some breakfast!" 

"Breakfast? But I thought it was almost 12?", Lizzie asked… 

"Five after now. But I know how much you love pancakes, so I saved some batter, and I can whip you up a fresh stack if you want, or I can make you a quick sandwich, whatever you like." 

Lizzie scrunched up her nose, and thought a bit… "Uh, thanks Mom, but after last night, I must have gained 10 pounds, could I just have some toast and juice?" 

"Of course, dear, but don't worry, you didn't gain even 5 pounds, and if you did, so what? You're still my Lizzie." She hugged her daughter… 

"You're only 14. Don't forget what happened to Miranda a few months ago, when she thought she was getting fat. You're perfect." 

And with that, her mother was gone, leaving Lizzie's door slightly open… 

Lizzie lay there for a minute or two, maybe three, trying to figure things out. "Oh well," she thought, "Guess I'll get ready and go to Miranda's. Maybe she can decipher dreams better than I can…" 

She got up without making her bed… too late to shower… guess I'll get ready in here… she threw some clothes on her bed, picked a few, and went to close her door… 

Everyone was probably downstairs, but she didn't want to take any chances. Maybe it was just paranoia, but ever since that body switching incident with Matt, he seemed to be spying on her… Of course, they'd both agreed the whole thing had been a dream, but Kate muttered something about "baked beans, baked beans" for a week after when she saw Lizzie, and one day she ran off screaming when they were served to her in the cafeteria… 

Ugh! She couldn't let her own brother scope her out. Although no one else seemed to be trying to. She remembered the time a year ago or so, when she and Miranda had been changing, talking loudly, and they either didn't hear Gordo knock, or something… 

They screamed, and tried to hide in the closet. Gordo looked very embarrassed, and left quickly. Later he said it was no big deal, he'd seen them in swimsuits before, it was the same thing, just different material. But, as he said it, he had an odd look on his face… 

She looked turned this way and that, examining her form in the mirror. She thought she looked ok, but the only "guys" who ever complimented her were Dad and Gordo… And Dad, he didn't count, because, well, he was Dad… And Gordo, he was her friend, he was probably just trying to make her feel better… 

She finished dressing, and went downstairs, leaving her room a mess. Everyone was gone! There was a plate with two pieces of toast, a glass of orange juice, and a note… 

_ "Lizzie, sorry we're not here, but your brother got in a snowball fight that turned into a real fight, and we have to go talk to the parents. See you in an hour or two. Love, Mom and Dad. _

"Now what?" thought Lizzie. She drank the juice in two gulps, put down the glass, snatched one piece of toast, and grabbed for the phone with her free hand… 

"Hmmm, busy"... she waited a minute and tried again… no dice… she walked into the living room, and flipped on the TV. All she could find were Christmas shows.. She'd had enough of those, so she turned it off… 

Again, she tried calling Miranda's… nothing but a busy signal… "Guess I better just go," she thought… she grabbed her jacket and a box labeled, "To Miranda" and left the house, locking the door behind her… 

** A/N Sorry if this chapter's kinda dull, it'll get better… Review if you want or email… thanks… JP **

March 1, 2003 


	3. Visiting A Friend

** A/N Thanks for all the reviews! I didn't even promote my story anywhere. Guess it doesn't hurt to post on a Saturday morning ! **

To the reviewers… 

Re: Flashbacks 

Sorry, deal with it, it's full of flashbacks, I skip over some stuff then flashback, if I didn't the story would be like 80 chapters. 

Re: My age. 

If you read the message boards, or yahoo or msn groups, there are other males over the age range for this show (10-15). I can totally relate to the show, Lizzie reminds me of a girl I couldn't express myself to. Although I was more like Tudgeman, so maybe that's why I wasn't successful. 

Re: Updates. 

I will update on a regular basis until finished. All of this is on paper now, have to type it up. But sometimes I can't read my own writing. 

I will also add stuff to what's already on paper, as I upload, since I sometimes wonder, "Why did I put that?" or "Why'd I leave out that?" 

Re: unasked question I just thought of… 

In the first chapter, I wrote that Matt was in a snowball fight, then I remembered that all signs point to the show taking place in California… Well, there is snow in the mountains in California, like by San Bernardino and stuff… So, that's where he was, ok? 

Re: Why isn't Lizzie opening presents on Christmas morning? 

I was going to explain in the next chapter, but here goes. I just incorporated something from my own family. 

We all gather at my grandmother's (five generations) on Dec. 24 and pig out (mainly tamales and fudge but all kinds of grub), and watch Christmas stuff. At midnight, it's officially Dec 25, we start opening presents. My grandmother's the last to finish, around 3 am. Some go home, some fall asleep in front of the tree (or pass out), others stay up all night. Then more family comes in the afternoon, that couldn't be there Christmas Eve. Does that make sense? 

Good. Sorry for the long note... 

Disclaimer- I do not have any connections with Walt Disney Enterprises or its subsidiaries, so I do not own Lizzie McGuire. As for my story, I'm not sure about that either… 

On to Chapter 2 

Chapter 2 

Visiting Friends 

  


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Lizzie started down the driveway, almost bumping into her brother. He looked terrible, he had a black eye, his new jacket he got for Christmas was ripped, and it looked like he had a bloody nose not too long ago… 

"Matt? I thought Mom and Dad were coming to get you, what happened?" 

"I don't have time for you right now, bug off !!!!" 

"Come on, Matt, spill. I got a note from Mom and Dad saying something about a fight, and you look awful. Where's Mom and Dad?" 

Matt looked at her disgustedly. "They're still at Lanny's, they sent me home, because they said you'd be here to let me in, if I hurried... I really don't want to talk about it!" 

"Matt, I'm not giving you my key until you tell me what's going on!" 

"FINE! I went with Lanny and his dad and Melina up to see the snow, and everything was fine. We made snow angels, and a snowman, then we got into a FUN little snowball fight." Matt said the word 'fun' as if it were a disease… 

"That doesn't sound so bad, Matt," said Lizzie. 

"No, it was great, until... until..." 

"Yes?" Lizzie was growing impatient, talking to her brother was not her idea of a good time, and she wanted to get to Miranda's. 

Matt started to talk faster, as if he had to get the words over with… "IstoppedtogetmoresnowandwhenIdid," he took a breath... "Melina kissed Lanny!" 

"Wow," was all Lizzie could say… 

"Yeah, I said, I thought you liked me! And she said, I did for awhile, but that was after you liked me, and now I like Lanny. So now you know, move outta my way, before I do to you what I did to Lanny!!!

She gave him the key, and left quickly...She'd never seen Matt so upset... the trio of Matt, Melina, and Lanny was like the trio of Lizzie, Miranda, and Gordo in many ways...I wonder if... she stopped and shook the thought from her head. "No!", she exclaimed. It's not possible. That was a long time ago, and she couldn't think of one good reason for what she was thinking. 

She walked down the sidewalk, wishing it would snow here, but it seemed more like autumn. No one was around, so she walked with one foot off the curb, crunching dry leaves, and twigs. 

As she neared Miranda's house, she noticed an unfamailiar blue car in the driveway. Must be relatives, visiting for the holidays. Reaching the front door, she knocked to no response, waited, tried again. Then she rang the doorbell, and heard loud, fast footsteps. 

"Yes?" 

Someone she had never seen, but assumed to be Miranda's aunt glared at Lizzie. She looked like she'd been interrupted, and she wasn't happy about it. 

"Uh, hi, I'm Lizzie, Miranda's friend, and she's been out of school, and I just wanted to give her this present and wish her Merry Christmas." 

The nameless aunt seemed to recognize's Lizzie's name,, but Lizzie wasn't sure. Suddenly, she turned downright cold toward Lizzie. 

"I'll take that, Miranda's not up to visitors now." She snatched the box out of Lizzie's hands, and quickly closed the door. 

Lizzie was a little stunned, to say the least. She could hear voices talking rapidly in English, and Spanish. The door was reopened by Miranda's mother. 

She apologized to Lizzie, and returned Miranda's gift to her. "Sorry, she didn't know it was alright to let you in. But you can't stay long, Miranda needs rest, ok? 

Lizzie nodded, and followed Mrs. Sanchez, pausing to admire the Christmas decorations. She turned at the door to Miranda's bedroom, but Mrs. Sanchez montioned her to the parents' bedroom. 

"She's not feeling so good yet, and our room is bigger, with a TV and more sun," she said in response to Lizzie's unanswered question. "Please don't stay long," she cautioned again. "If Miranda needs me, I'll be in the kitchen." 

Again, Lizzie nodded, and slowly opened the door. Miranda was lying down on a large bed, gazing at the wall. 

"Oh, hi," said Miranda, speaking emotionlessly, as she turned to face Lizzie. 

"Hi, 'randa, Missed you at school the past couple of days, how you feeling?" 

"Oh, ok," she said as if to say, "I don't want to talk about it." "Hey, is that for me?", she said as she pointed to the box. 

"Yeah," said Lizzie sitting the box down on the dresser next to the bed. 

"I have your present, but it's in my room, and I haven't felt like wrapping it, can I give it to you later?" 

"Ok I guess. Say, Miranda, I had another dream about Ethan this morning. We were getting married, then Gordo broke it up. Any ideas to what it means?", she asked inquisitively. 

"Yeah, it's a fantasy that won't happen!", she yelled at Lizzie, then softened her face as if to apolgize for yelling at her friend. "I don't feel so good, can I call you later?" 

Lizzie started to apologize. "Geez, I'm sorry, Miranda, I know you like him, too, I just thought you could help tell me what it means, that's all!" 

Miranda started to get agitated again. "I told you what the damn dream means, now please get out!"

Lizzie threw the box at Miranda and stormed out on the verge of tears. 

"Lizzie, I'm sorry. Call me later and we'll talk.", said Miranda as Lizzie was leaving. 

Lizzie didn't hear Miranda and stormed out, without saying goodbye to Mrs. Sanchez. "Now, what?", she thought. "I'm hungry, shoulda had more than toast and juice, maybe I'll go to Jack In the Box."

** (A/N I originally said McDonalds, but they are closed Christmas, JIB is open year-round) **

Sometime later, she found herself with half a cold cheeseburger, some stale curly fries, and a lot of ice. "How long have I been here?", she thought, looking at her new watch, an early Christmas gift. "Yikes! An hour!" She threw out the burger and fries, refilled her cup with lemonade, and decided to go see Gordo. Gordo loved curly fries, so she bought another box, and left the restaurant. 

"Gee, I hope Gordo's in a better mood than Miranda was", she thought as she walked the few blocks to her other best friend's house… 

** A/N That came out a lot longer when I typed it than my original draft. It needed something. Review if you like, or email or IM me. JP5683@webtv.net or JP5683@msn.com **

Next chapter to be up Tuesday or Wednesday. 

Thanks,   
JP 

March 2, 2003 


	4. What It Feels Like For A Gordo

** A/N This chapter wasn't even in my original draft, but I thought it up a couple of days ago. I thought you needed to see Gordo's thoughts... In some ways, this is more Gordo's story than Lizzie's...in the Xtreme Xmas episode, he celebrates both Hannukah and Christmas, so he does here too... It isn't unusual or anything... Maybe he's a Messianic Jew? I don't want to get into any religious arguments here, just wanted to explain a little. **

Re: to reviewers 

Maybe Miranda is PMSy, maybe it's something else. I never put she had a cold or the flu or anything, ya know. 

That's why I moved this to Drama. There's some heavy stuff here. Not all of it, but it's not all fluffy... 

Re: story continuity. 

Everyone knows Di$ney messed up the order of the eps. Which is why I had a reference to the episode where Lizzie tried to impress Ethan, in the first chapter, because it was produced and shown before the Christmas ep, but set after. It just worked better for my story anyways...For the most part, I'll try to put stuff in the right order, but this IS fiction, right? 

Re: etc. I'm my own worst critic. You may like what's coming, or may say it's terrible. Tell me either way. 

Disclaimer – I don't work for/with Disney, Ren-Mar Studios, etc. So I don't own the characters. Enough rambling. 

On to chapter 3 

Chapter 3 

What it Feels Like for a Gordo 

  


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David Gordon was having an unusual Christmas Day, to say the least. His parents had left at 4 AM to catch a plane, saying they'd get a discount for flying on the holiday. He had decided to celebrate Christmas as always this year, along with Hannukah. His parents said they now considered him an adult, so it didn't matter to them. He knew what he believed, and that was the important thing. He loved his parents, but being the son of two psychiatrists was taxing at times, to say the least. He was used to one of them being away at a seminar or whatever, but it wasn't until his bar mitzvah that they'd started leaving together, and leaving him without a chaperone. 

Since they knew ahead of time they would be gone, they had given gifts the day before. They also told him since he was an adult, he could pick his own gifts now. What he needed, wanted, and could use. No more would they buy unnecessary items. 

While at first he thought this was great, he soon realized part of the fun of getting gifts is the thought that the person puts into selecting it... They also told him that if he wanted, he didn't have to say they were Christmas presents, just gifts. Since he had decided to still celebrate Christmas, it didn't really matter what they were called. 

When he'd asked his parents what what so important that they had to leave today, they said they were doing it for him, to provide for him, and his future. His parents meant well, but he what he really wanted was to be able to talk to them, for them to be there for him, not just for them to support him financially. 

He awoke at six A.M., anticipating Lizzie's call. She always opened her presents, had breakfast with the family, then called him, usually by seven, telling him all about her gifts, and inviting him over for the afternoon. He knew it was coming, so he waited, and waited. 

When she didn't call by eight, he got worried. She'd been upset with him because he hadn't helped her much with her Christmas float, but he thought she was over that. When he'd talked to her last, on the 23rd, everything seemed fine. He hoped she wasn't angry with him. 

By nine, he remembered what Lizzie had told him. Her family was going to try something new this year, stay up until midnight and open gifts. Her grandmother wouldn't arrive until Christmas evening, so there would be more presents then. 

He didn't want to wake anyone if they were sleeping in, but finally about 12:20 he'd called, to no answer. He decided he'd make a quick trip to see Miranda, then come home and wait for Lizzie to call or come by. On any other day, he'd wouldn't hesitate to go to her house, regardless of whether he'd been invited. But Christmas was different. 

He picked up the small box he had custom wrapped for Miranda, and again noticed how much smaller it was than the box he had prepared for Lizzie. He couldn't believe how much he'd spent on Lizzie. Everything he found, he wanted to give her. He hoped Miranda wouldn't be offended by his present… Not that it wasn't something special, it's just that Lizzie's gift was, well, more. 

Lizzie had been his best friend since birth, and he considered Miranda a best friend too, but lately he had started to think of Miranda as more like a sister, and Lizzie, well, not like a sister, but hopefully as more than just a friend… 

He'd locked up the house, and left home around a quarter to one, arriving at Miranda's minutes later. He had a hard time getting to see Miranda, but finally was let in. He noticed that Miranda didn't seem physically sick, but it seemed deeper. He asked her how things were, and when she responded with an unconvincing, "Fine", he'd asked again. 

He seemed to sense she was torn, like she wanted to talk to someone but didn't want to burden him with her problems. He told her he knew she was not "fine" and said she didn't have to tell him, but she'd feel better if she did. He wasn't quite sure what he could do, but he could at least listen. 

He was surprised when she broke out in tears, Miranda wasn't one to cry. She told him how Lizzie had been there just minutes before, and she had ordered her away. She didn't really want to, but while she had needed to talk to someone, it didn't seem right to talk to Lizzie. 

She told him that they had all three been friends so long, that they usually instinctively knew when one of the others was hiding something. But Lizzie had accepted Miranda's "I'm ok", and Gordo hadn't. She told him her story, and when she was finished, Gordo was a bit shocked, not only at what she'd said, but at the fact she trusted him enough to reveal her problems. 

She then surprised Gordo even more, by telling him that he wasn't keeping his feelings hidden as well as he thought... "You like Lizzie, don't you?", she said matter-of-factly… 

"Yes, and I like you too," he replied almost automatically. 

"No, no, you LIKE like Lizzie, don't you?", she said a little more forcefully this time. 

He swallowed hard, and took a deep breath. Miranda's gaze was boring a hole into him, and he answered her with a weak, "Yes." 

"What? Speak up and say it like you mean it!", she ordered him. 

"Yes. I like Lizzie as more than just a best friend", he said, unsure of what Miranda would do next. 

"Good for you, you finally admitted it, I've known it for awhile now, but I'm not the one you need to tell. Now WHY haven't you told Lizzie?" 

"I, I don't want to push her into something she doesn't want. She's the best thing that ever happened to me, and I don't want to hurt her, and lose our friendship." 

"And what makes you think you'd lose your friendship? Is it me? Do you think I'd desert the two of you? I could never do that. Tell you what Gordo, you help me with my problems a little, I'll help you with yours a little, and we won't tell Lizzie about it for now." 

"Isn't that dishonest?", Gordo questioned. 

"No, we'll tell her later. After you can finally reveal your feelings, and I can get over my problems, then we'll tell her. We are strong enough to help each other, and I don't want Lizzie's world to turn upside down because of us." 

Gordo didn't know what to say. He thrust out the small box he'd brought for Miranda. "Here, here's your gift. I hope it's alright. I'm afraid it's not much." 

She pulled out a brass pendant with her name on it. "It's beautiful, Gordo. Thank you. Besides, I know you probably spent all the rest of your money on Lizzie." 

Gordo started to blush, but again, Miranda spoke. 

"It's ok, Gordo, really. I hope you'll impress her, but don't go to far too fast." She stopped, then asked, "Can you do something else for me?" 

He didn't know what else he could do, but listened carefully. 

"I told Lizzie I hadn't wrapped her gift, and that's true. It's in my room, and so is your present. Will you please take them home, and wrap hers for me. Here, I know you don't like to wrap gifts, you can use the box you gave me. " She put on the necklace, and handed the box to Gordo. 

"Now, on my dresser is a blue plastic bag. Both your gifts are there. I think you can figure which is which. I don't think my Mom or my Aunt will give you any trouble, but if they say anything, I'll tell them I okayed you to go in there. It's silly to have you wrap your own gift, but if you want, it's ok with me." She knew Gordo was all thumbs when it came to wrapping presents. Hers had been done by a store clerk, and probably Lizzie's, as well. 

He hesitated. He didn't feel quite comfortable entering a girl's bedroom without the girl being there… 

She laughed at him, the first time she'd laughed all day. "It's ok Gordo I trust you. Just get the bag, and go. You've been in my room before, it's alright, really." 

He smiled at her, feeling silly that he had reacted that way. 

"One more thing, Gordo. I told Lizzie to call me later, but I'm sorta banned from the phone now, that's one reason I'm in here, there no phone. I hope to get my computer back tomorrow, tell Lizzie I'll talk to her then, ok?" 

Gordo agreed, gave Miranda a quick hug, told her he'd do what he could, and started to leave. She stopped him. 

"Gordo, I know it will be easier to tell Lizzie when I'm not around. In a week or so, we will be back in school and I don't expect you to be able to tell her by then, but at least work on it, ok?" 

He nodded. He had no problem finding the bag in Miranda's room and no one stopped him as he left. He looked in the bag, and smiled. He knew which was his present and which was Lizzie's. The earrings were definitely for Lizzie. 

He returned home about 1:15 and saw no signs of visitors, and found nothing on the answering machine. He ransacked the house, looking for a better box to put the earrings in. the box he had used for Miranda's gift was a little more than twice the size he needed. He'd clean up later, his parents wouldn't return until the following evening. 

After 20 minutes or so, he decided to check his parents' room. His mom didn't have a lot of jewelry, but he thought maybe he'd find something. Every box he found seemed to be already holding something, so he put it aside and kept going. 

He was almost out of places to look, when he thought he'd heard a knock. Guess not. Oops, there it was again, a little louder, and more insistent. He could see the front door from his parents' room, but the curtains were drawn. He pulled them back just a crack, to see if there was someone there, but only a crack, so he wouldn't scare them away. 

It was Lizzie! His heart started to race. She looked as if she'd been crying a little while ago, and knew she probably did after leaving Miranda's. He was surprised she seemed to be wearing old clothes, he thought she'd have on one of the outfits she had gotten for Christmas. Even with the after effects of her crying, or in old clothes, she still was just as beautiful to him. He noticed, almost as an afterthought, she had a Jack in the Box bag in her hand, and a cup of something in the other. Had she brought him something? He hoped so, he'd had little food today. He had spent the morning thinking of Lizzie, and not his stomach, but the sight of a fast food sack made his stomach growl. 

She started to turn away from the door, she seemed upset that her knocks weren't answered. Was she leaving? No, she put down the food and drink, and it appeared she was looking through her purse for something with which to leave him a note. 

He almost opened the window, and called out to her, but thought better of it. He decided that he'd better go out there before she was gone. She didn't seem to have any paper on her, but soon she'd find some or leave. The box he'd used for Miranda's gift would have to do. He put the earrings inside, and swiped some tissue paper from the hall closet. That seemed to fit better. He quickly glanced out the peephole, and saw Lizzie leaning against his mailbox. Apparently, she'd finally found something to write on. He had to hurry, she'd be gone in a few seconds. He had to tell her now, that, yes, he was home. 

He slowly opened the door… 

** A/N Cliffhanger? Yes and no, as I'm planning to upload this chapter and next at the same time. This was a little different. And a little longer than the first two chapters. Was it ok? Let me know. Review or email me JP5683@webtv.net or JP5683@msn.com I do listen to your comments, but I do what I want. It's my story! **

Thanks,   
JP 

March 5. 2003 


	5. The Way To A Man's Heart Is Through His ...

** A/N No, I haven't given you time to review the last chapter. Since the last chapter came out of nowhere, I thought I'd give you two. I'd like to give you the complete story all at once, I can type out 50 wpm, but I don't have the time. Plus what you say about the story could influence what happens. Emphasis on could. I do listen, and I do thank you for your comments. I'm plannning to review your stories as well. I've read about 200 of the LM stories here, gotta go back and review… **

Disclaimer – I still haven't been hired by Disney, so I have no connections with Lizzie M. Have no financial interest in Jack in the Box, but the curly fries are excellent. Don't own a thing except myself. 

On to Chapter 4. 

Chapter 4 

The Way to A Man's Heart is Through His Stomach 

  


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Lizzie stopped half a block from Gordo's house. "Can't let him see I've been crying," she thought. As she was coming up his driveway, she glanced at the garage. "Oh, no!" It was open, and both his parents' cars were gone. Chances are, wherever they went, Gordo went along. They wouldn't leave him home alone on Christmas, or would they? 

There was a small chance. Taking a deep breath, and putting on a smile, she walked up and knocked on the door. She waited, fifteen, twenty, thirty seconds, no answer. She knocked again, slightly louder, slightly longer. She knocked for a third, and a fourth time, still no response. "Ouch!" she thought. "Wish Gordo had a doorbell." 

She was disappointed. One of her best friends had turned her away, the other wasn't home. Well, she'd just have to leave him a note. 

She set down her drink and the fries on the porch. She pulled out all sorts of things out of her purse. She discarded most of the paper as unable to be written on. "Can't use tissues. Need this receipt. Need that. Not enough room to write on." 

She was going to write on the back of the receipt from Jack in the Box, but she hadn't planned on leaving the fries. She had no idea when Gordo would return. Finally she found an old piece of paper, that only half had been used. She walked over to Gordo's mailbox, and leaned on it for support. She tore the paper neatly in half, and started to scribble a note... 

With the note finished, she turned back to the porch. The bag of fries and her drink were gone! She stood there for a minute, stunned, then heard a slight noise, as if someone were trying to stifle a laugh. She glanced back in the direction of the garage, and there stood Gordo, happily munching the fries, and drinking her lemonade. 

She walked over to him, and punched him on the arm. "Don't sneak up on me!" 

"Sorry. Mmm, curly fries", he said as he finished the last fry and last sip of lemonade, and burped. "Uh, excuse me." His face flushed. "Thanks, I needed that." 

She laughed, pleased to see Gordo in a good mood. "You're welcome. But next time could you chew a little?" 

"Sorry." He apologized for the second time in as many minutes. 

Lizzie didn't quite know what to say. "So, uh, Happy Hanukkah!", she exclaimed. 

"Uh, Lizzie? Hanukkah's over. It's okay to say, Merry Christmas now!" 

"Okay, Merry Christmas, guy!" Again, she punched him on the arm lightly. 

He rubbed his arm, mainly for effect. "Is that what I get for Christmas? Pain?", he joked. 

"No, well I thought maybe you would come back to my house with me and I'd give you your present then?" 

"Uh, sure. I've got your present inside. Let me throw this bag and cup away. I'm sorry I finished your drink, can I get you something to replace it?" 

"No, that's ok. I just refilled it to give to you, but to paraphase Forrest Gump, "I drank some." They both laughed. 

"Wait here, I'll be back in a minute", he said as he took off for the house. 

He told himself to relax. How many times had he said, "Sorry?" Three? He threw away the remains of his BIG lunch, and picked up Lizzie's present from Miranda, and then the one he was to give her, and went outside. 

"Is, is that for me?" Lizzie's eyes opened wide. The box Gordo was carrying was big, but it didn't look heavy. 

"Yes. It's all for you. This is from Miranda." He pointed to the small box he had balanced on the larger. 

"Mir-miranda?", she said not believing him. "How did you get it?" 

"I went to see Miranda about an hour ago, and she asked me to give it to you." 

"Did she tell you what happened? That she threw me out?" 

"Well, no", he lied. "She just said that you had given her present to her, but not the other way 'round, so she wanted me to bring it to you." 

"Oh, Gordo", she started to cry. "She was just awful to me, and I don't know what I did!"

"Well, she wasn't exactly Miss Jolly Old Elf to me either, but that's okay." He had to find a way to change the subject. Miranda didn't want Lizzie to know much. 

"Uh, Lizzie? Can we start for your house? These boxes aren't bricks, but they aren't feathers either." He made a show of exaggerating the weight, having to shift them a bit. He didn't know how convincing he was, but it didn't hurt to try. 

"Uh, sure. Can I help? She reached for the small box, but Gordo wouldn't let her have it. 

"No, no I can do it. You aren't opening either of these until I get my gift from you." 

She couldn't understand. This was Gordo. He didn't have to put on a macho act for her. Still, if that's what he wanted, then so be it. 

"So, how was your late night gift opening?" Gordo's question jolted Lizzie back from where she was, to the present. 

"Uh, ok, I guess. Matt said he was going to stay up the longest, but then he was to go with Lanny and his dad, and Melina up to the mountains for the snow this morning, so he wimped out before midnight. Mom and Dad made it just past, but I stayed up longer than anyone." 

"Great! I knew you could do it! That's my girl!" He stopped short. Had he said, "My" out loud? He hoped she wouldn't notice. 

She smiled. "So, Gordo, what did you get besides clothes?" 

"Uh, well, not much. My parents wanted to buy me a new computer, but I told them no." 

"What???" She didn't think she''d heard right. 

"Well, I told them what I had was ok. But they are going to get me a DVD ROM and a burner, and stuff next week." 

"Well at least someone got something good. All I got was clothes. No money, no gift certificates. Just clothes." She looked upset about it. 

"And where are these new threads? The fashion conscious Lizzie McGuire is wearing an outfit for the second time while new clothes are at home, unworn? I'm shocked!"

"Well, it's just my parents have such odd taste. I mean, they never get me what I like. I'll ask my mom if I can exchange some of it next week." She stopped and thought. "Oh yeah, I got this new watch. Whoopee."

They were just coming up on Lizzie's house. "Are you sure that's all you got?" she asked him. 

"Well," he began. He had left out one item, he didn't know why he was keeping it a secret. "They got me a brand new tripod for my video camera." 

She was about to ask why, because he rarely taped anything anymore. But here they were at her front door. She opened the door, and called out, "I'm home!" 

** A/N Not exactly where I wanted to leave off, but the chapter is getting long. Review if you like, or email or IM me JP5683 @ msn.com or webtv.net. **

Next chapter should be up Thursday evening/Friday morning, I hope. 

Thanks,   
JP 

March 5, 2003 


	6. Exchanging Gifts And Maybe, A Bit More

** A/N Thanks for the reviews, I appreciate it. If I could, I'd update 3 times a day. I'm updating Wednesday evening, it'll show early Thursday morning, because I'll be busy tomorrow. **

Disclaimer- I do not work for, now or ever, Ren-Mar Studios, or Di$ney. I have no connections with Lizzie McGuire, but if you do, let me know. Songs used are property of the artists, record labels, or ASCAP/BMI. I don't even own this computer, but I do own a spiffy new laptop... 

On to Chapter 5... 

Chapter 5 

Exchanging Gifts, And Maybe, A Bit More 

  


--------------------------------------- 

The front door opened slowly. "That's ok, just leave me out here, I don't mind," Gordo lamented as he joined Lizzie. 

"Oops, sorry, come on," she pulled Gordo through the house. 

"Lizzie, where have you been? It's almost 3 o'clock!", her father asked. 

"Uh, sorry, forgot to set my new watch, I'll fix it later, gotta show Gordo something, bye!" 

Gordo said a quick hello, as he was pulled upstairs. "Ow, hey! At least you could let me give a proper greeting to your parents!" 

"Sorry, Gordo, but I want my present, and I don't get it until you get yours, so hurry up!" 

He pulled his arm out of her vise-like grip. He usually liked when she held his hand, but now it hurt. He shook it several times, and flexed his fingers. 

"Oh, come on! I didn't break it, you big baby, now move it! 

The sound of her mother's voice came up to her. "Lizzie? Lizzie?" 

Lizzie went to the top step and looked down. "What, Mom?" 

"Tell Gordo he's welcome to stay for a little while, but Gammy should be here soon. When she gets here, he has to go home." 

"Ok, Mom!" She turned back, muttering, "Great, Gammy McGuire. She'll probably give me something weird, as usual." She saw Gordo standing outside Matt's room. Music, or something like it, could clearly be heard in the hall, Matt was singing along. 

_ 'Cause I'd rather spend eternity, eating shards of broken glass, than spend one more minute with youuuuuuu _

"Ugh, that's music?" Lizzie made a face, stuck out her tongue, and pretended to put her finger down her throat. "I can't believe Matt got a new CD player for Christmas. Mine's two years old!" 

"Uh, it's Weird Al," said Gordo. 

"Weird Al? Aren't you past that juvenile stuff yet?" Come on, you didn't come here to see Matt, did you?" 

"Let me guess, Matt's trip to the mountains didn't have a happy ending, did it?", Gordo inquired. 

"Not really. How did you know that?" She pushed open the door to her room. 

Gordo was about to answer, but the sight of Lizzie's room stopped him. "Uh, I love what you've done with the place, really," He said in a mock serious tone. 

Clothes, clean and dirty, were thrown all over the place, the bed, the floor, the computer, dresser drawers were open, it was a Grade-A mess. 

"Eek!," Lizzie shrieked, involuntarily. Among other things, there was a bra draped over her telephone, and two pairs of underwear on her pillow. She grabbed for them, and threw them in a drawer, then shut everything quickly. 

She spun around, Gordo had one of his goofy grins on his face. "Tell me you didn't see that!", she exclaimed. She started to turn red. 

"See what? I only see what I want to see." He laughed. "It's ok, Lizzie. I've known you since you were born. Don't be embarrassed. Everybody wears that stuff." 

Lizzie gave him a strange look. "Uh, not everybody, just girls, uh, women, uh females, uh, here!" Hoping to change the subject, he handed Lizzie her present. 

She reached in the closet, and pulled out a giftbag, and handed it to Gordo. "Uh, thanks." 

He took it, and pulled out his gift. "Wow, two pounds of imported chocolate, and a book of logic!" He was genuinely appreciative to receive these items, but felt it would only show how much more he had spent on her gift. 

"Well, I thought maybe it would keep you occupied while Miranda and I girl talk... Uh, Gordo? Exactly how much tape did they put on here?" She had removed the wrapping paper, but the box was still tightly sealed. She set the box on the bed, and started rummging through her desk for scissors, a knife, whatever. 

"So, What's so bad about your parents' gifts that you couldn't wear any of them today?" Gordo thought she looked great in anything, but he was curious what was so terrible about her new outfits, and didn't want to talk right now about Miranda OR girl stuff. 

She couldn't find anything other than a skate key to cut open the box, and she talked as she slowly cut the tape. "Uh, over there, next to where your present was, the other bags." 

He peered into the closet, but didn't touch anything. He was slightly afraid of what he might find. "Uh, looks ok to me." 

"Ok? Ok? Just like what a guy would say. They should have gotten me gift certificates, or taken me to the mall, and gave me some money or something. What do they think, that I'm going to come home dressed like an extra from a Britney Spears video?" 

Gordo closed his eyes, and thought a minute, and laughed. "What, Gordo?" 

"N-nothin' Just trying to picture you in a red vinyl suit. Rrrrrowww!" 

"Shut up!" She hit him with a pillow with her free hand. She had opened the box halfway by now, but was still struggling with the other flap. 

"Uh, would this help?" Gordo held up a pocket sized box cutter. He passed it to Lizzie. 

"WHY didn't you tell me you had one of those?" She quickly opened the box, set it down, handed the cutter back to Gordo, and now that both her hands were free, hit him harder with the pillow. 

"Ow, ow!", he protested. "You never asked me." 

She found several smaller packages inside. "So, what did you get Miranda?" 

"A pendant with her name on it", he said softly. 

"Hmmm," she thought. "That's what you gave me last year." She then asked, "And what did she give you?" 

"A hardback copy of the complete trilogy of Lord of the Rings. She said since I was all into dwarves and stuff before, at least I should be into the good guys." 

"Oh, Gordo, they're beautiful!" She'd only half heard what she said. "Are you sure all this is for me?" She opened 3 packages so far, there were more... 

"What's this?" She held up a white top, wondering why he'd picked that. 

"Uh, well remember last year, you ruined that outfit with the Italian food, I tried to get you a replacement, but it's not exactly the same." He didn't bring up HOW the outfit got ruined, she'd remember. 

Once again, she'd only half listened. "Oh, Gordo! How did you get this? It must have cost a fortune!" She was holding the sweater she'd looked at in the mall for a month. It cost way too much for her allowance. 

"Uh, I bought it." Duh, of course he bought it. What he didn't say is that he'd gotten it wholesale, for 60 % off. 

"Gordo, you shouldn't have. All these? There are enough presents here for five gifts. B-but thanks." She smiled at him. 

What a lovely smile. What should he say, "I did it because I love you, and I always want you to have the best?" "If I could I'd buy you anything you wanted, just name it, and it's yours?" 

"Uh, sure no problem, what are friends for?" He mentally slapped himself. When could he get what was in his heart to come out his mouth? "Uh, try it on the sweater, go ahead." 

She squealed, and started to at the sweater she was currently wearing. Gordo froze, not sure what to do. "Gordo! Out!" 

He smiled, did an about face, and started to leave. She threw a pillow at him. "And don't come back until I say so!" 

He caught the pillow, and left the room, closed the door, and stood in the hall. Matt had turned off the stereo, so now Gordo could think. "Why didn't you leave sooner? What were you thinking?" He was feeling a little braver since Miranda wasn't around. He pulled a stray blonde hair off Lizzie's pillow. So soft, so very soft. How he longed to just be able to touch her hair. When he was much younger, the three friends had combed each other's hair, as Gordo was reluctantly made to play "beauty parlor". He squeezed the pillow, and got a whiff of something. Strawberries? Peaches? It was just Lizzie. He sighed. He wish she'd hurry... 

Lizzie decided to try on the new sweater only. She'd save the top for another day. What was up with Gordo? He'd never try to stay around when I was getting dressed before? She thought back to when she'd become friends with Miranda. Miranda couldn't believe Lizzie was best friends with a boy. She'd never thought of him until then as a boy, but yet, she knew he wasn't a girl. Even then at the age of 5, she had become more self conscious when Gordo was around. She smoothed out the sweater, and called out, "Gordo? You can come back now!" 

She giggled, in spite of herself. Gordo had the pillow over his eyes, and was slowly moving forward. "Are you sure you're decent?" 

"Yes Gordo. How do I look?" She did a couple of spins to show off the sweater. 

Gordo dropped the pillow, and his jaw. "Lizzie. You are the most beautiful girl in the world!" He couldn't stop himself. 

She blushed deeply, then retrieved the pillow, and again, threw it at him. "Come on, be serious!" 

"I AM serious! If beauty was all it took, in that sweater you could be... President of the United States." 

"Real smooth, Gor-dork.", he insulted himself. "What made you say a corny thing like that?" 

Lizzie couldn't smile any bigger. She was so happy, she was almost about to cry. "You're so sweet, Gordo. You always know how to make me feel better." 

She reached out and gave him a hug. She felt him stiffen up and slightly pull away. "Uh, how about some refreshments? There's cake downstairs." 

"Mmmm, cake, I love cake. Even more than curly fries." He turned and quickly left the room. 

Lizzie felt a bit dizzy. Why was Gordo behaving so strangely? All she'd done was given him a friendly hug. "He WAS sweet, wasn't he? What's wrong with that?" 

She tried to calm herself. This was just plain old Gordo, nothing had changed. She thought she'd better go get some cake too, after all, that burger and fries was more than an hour ago, and she'd only eaten half. She went out in the hall, and closed her bedroom door behind her. 

** A/N Sorry to cut it off, gotta get some rest. Next part up late Friday, early Saturday morning. No time to update before. Got an expensive new toy to play with. Review if you like, or email JP5683 @ webtv.net or @ msn.com **

"One More Minute" is by "Weird Al" Yankovic and owned by Volcano Records and Al. 

Thanks,   
JP 

March 6, 2003 


	7. Hertz Donut?

** A/N Re: Reviewers--- **

Sesen Obsisdian Moon & December Everett, you're gonna give me a swelled head. But keep it up! :-) 

Everybody else, thanks as well... Those two have reviewed more than once, so they get mentioned. 

RealXenocide, Britfan1, thanks for all the help as well. 

Re: Miranda. 

No, I don't believe what I'm going to write happened on the show. Miranda wasn't in the Xmas episode, so I'm giving her a reason why she wasn't. Of course, the episode didn't stretch to Christmas Day.

Re: Lizzie's presents I don't know what the other gifts Gordo gave her are. Cd's? Candy? I'll leave it up to you... (nobody asked yet, but still I thought I'd answer) 

Re: being a male writer. 

Like I said before, there are others, but I'm trying to do good. 

Disclaimer- I do not work for Disney or Ren-Mar Studios, etc. I have no connections with Lizzie McGuire. 

On to Chapter 6. 

Chapter 6 

Hertz Donut? 

  


------------ 

Lizzie didn't know what to think. Maybe she had low blood sugar, maybe it was the time of the season. But she had a strange, warm feeling when she thought of Gordo. "Stop it, he's your friend, and that's all." She pushed any other possibilties out of her head, but still wasn't back to normal. She bumped into Gordo, who was waiting on the second step of the stairs. 

"Hey! Watch it, McGuire! Remember no more pain for Christmas!" He smiled at her. 

"S-sorry, Gordo, guess I wasn't paying attention. Wait, what are you still doing up here?" 

"Well, it's true I love cake, but I'd thought I'd be nice and wait for you. Oh, and you also forgot to open Miranda's gift." 

She thought a minute, "How'd he get the box back? He must have swiped it off the desk when I wasn't looking..." 

"Uh, well I was so excited by all your gifts, I just forgot, why they're beautiful!" 

Miranda had given Lizzie a pair of blue seashell earrings. Lizzie went back to the upstairs bathroom, and stepped inside. "Gordo? Gordo?" 

"Uh, Lizzie?" Gordo stood right outside, not stepping in. "Are you sure it's okay for me to go in there with you?" 

"GOR-DO!! Don't be gross. I'm just going to use the mirror to see how these look." She turned to Gordo, who was now just barely inside the bathroom door. "How do I look? 

"Great, Lizzie. Absolutely fantastic." She smiled at him and he saw her through the mirror, then she turned, and smiled again, so he could see her better this time. His heart started to race, he felt weak. Didn't she know the power of her smile? He thought, "If only I could tell her how I feel. That it doesn't matter if she thinks she's popular or whatever, or not. I think she's the greatest girl in the world." He shook his head. No, that would ruin years of a wonderful friendship, and he could never hurt Lizzie in the least. 

Lizzie watched Gordo, who seemed to be deep in thought, then he seemed to shake himself back to reality. "Gordo? Gordo? How 'bout that cake?" Gordo stayed put, so she started to go down the stairs first. Gordo ran to catch up, and bumped into Lizzie, who was waiting halfway in between the top and bottom of the stairs. He had to grab on to her to keep from falling, and Lizzie almost tripped. 

"Ow! You were willing to wait for me, so I was willing to wait for you! Why did you try to run over me?" Lizzie wasn't hurt, but a little annoyed. 

Gordo didn't say a word, but followed a half step behind Lizzie, careful NOT to bump into her again, but oddly, he hoped he would. In a strange way, he liked it, his body got a little tingle when they had touched. Lizzie was strong, yet soft. So soft. He was so deep in thought, that he didn't even realize they were off the stairs. He kept moving as if he still had more stairs, and as a result, tripped on the rug.... 

"Gordo? Are you ok?" Lizzie stood over him, and waited for him to get up. 

He said into the rug before standing up, "I know it wasn't your fault, but PLEASE PLEASE no more pain for Christmas for Gordo. He can't take much more." 

Lizzie helped guide him into the kitchen. She poured him a soda with ice, and motioned to the plates of food on the table. He held the ice cold glass to his forehead, and reached not for cake, but for fudge. 

"Do you have a headache? Can I get you an aspirin or something?" 

"Well a little, but I just need something cold on it, and a sugar rush." He noticed Lizzie seemed to be very concerned now. He wasn't used to the extra attention, it was usually he that helped and consoled her. She looked at him, as if to say, "Please let me help you, how?" What could he say? "Ah, my Florence Nightengale, there is nothing more you can do, for knowing you are geniunely concerned is enough." No, she'd laugh him right out the door. 

Lizzie watched Gordo. He seemed to be ok, but he didn't want help now. She'd just wait if he thought of something she could do. Suddenly, he got up, leaving half the soda behind. 

"Thanks, Lizzie. Maybe I should just go home and relax. Maybe a nap is what I need to get rid of this headache." 

She pleaded with him. Are you sure you're okay? Stay a while longer... at least let me get my Dad to give you a ride home." 

"Lizzie, I'll be fine," he tried to reassure her. 

"Do you want me to walk back with you? I will." 

"LIZZIE! I'll be fine. I need to be by myself for a bit, have a lot on my mind. I'll call you when I get home, so you know I didn't get eaten by a bear or something." 

"Ha Ha, very funny. Ok, call me." She walked with him to the door, and said goodbye. He was really acting weird today. Maybe Miranda knew something. Lizzie headed back upstairs for privacy, to call. 

"Honey, did Gordo go home already?" Her mother came in from the den. 

"Yeah Mom, he said he had a headache or something, and he wanted to think and rest." 

"Well, Gammy called and she's going to be a little late. I was going to tell you to invite Gordo to dinner, but I guess not." Her mother went into the kitchen... 

Lizzie went into her room, and remembered that Gordo was to call her when he got home. She waited for his call, and packaged up the gifts he had given her. She couldn't believe all he'd done. It was like he was trying to impress her or something. But that would be silly. Her thoughts began to wander, when the phone rang. She lunged for it on the second ring, making the phone emit a hiccup-like sound. 

"Hello?" 

"Lizzie, it's me." 

"Hi, Gordo. You okay now?" He seemed calm, almost too calm. 

"I'm fine. Two bears tried to eat me, but I wouldn't let them, I said I had a phone call to make." 

"Gordo, cut it out! Enough with the bears!" 

"Ok, I'm going to catch twenty winks now, talk to you probably tomorrow. Thanks again for the gifts. Bye." 

"And thank you, Gordo. You didn't have to, but I appr-" She was talking to a dial tone. 

She definitely needed Miranda. She hoped she would be willing to talk to her now. She dialed, and someone picked up, then hung up, without a word. She tried again, same result. Miranda had caller ID, she probably was checking for Lizzie's number to show, then POW! 

Lizzie then checked her email, and to her surprise found one from Miranda. 

_ "Lizzie,   
Just a quick I'm sorry. I guess I got mad because I'm tired of being stuck here, and I hadn't talked to you or seen you for a couple of days. No hard feelings, k? My mom wants me to rest some more, so I can't chat, and if you call, I can't talk. I don't think I'll be able to until next week. Sorry. Hope your Christmas is good, see you after New Year's, probably back at school.   
--Miranda--" _

Lizzie was relieved at the apology, but a week without Miranda? She hadn't seemed THAT sick. Her mother called from downstairs, "Lizzie! Gammy's not late after all. Come on down!" 

She reluctantly shut down her PC, and went back downstairs, silently pleading for sanity. 

Gordo was honestly trying to nap, with no luck. He'd tried the couch, his bed, the floor. Turning on soft music. Nothing. A lot had happened today. Miranda had trusted him with a secret, and it wasn't the only thing he was keeping from Lizzie. He HATED not being able to tell her his feelings. Although, what if she felt the same way, even a little? NO, impossible, he could not think of one instance where she might have shown anything other than that she was a friend. The bestest best friend he'd ever have. But, could he remain friends with her, when he felt they should be more? And would Miranda truly accept her new "role" if he could reveal his feelings, and by some miracle they were returned? He was glad his parents wouldn't be back too quick, he didn't think he'd sleep much tonight, and he still had to clean up the house before they returned... 

** A/N When I next post, it will be from my brand new laptop. I LOVE it! So much better than this dinosaur. This will be up early Saturday morning, next chapter sometime Monday, or Tuesday AM. **

Same drill, review if you like or email JP5683@webtv.net I DO answer all emails, and may email you about a review, if you sign it, and it's on your profile. 

Thanks, thanks, thanks!   
JP 

March 8, 2003 


	8. Things Are Back To Abnormal

** A/N I'm writing this Sunday to post Monday, laptop's still in the shop... **

Thanks again for your comments. I wanted this to be a story that meant something, not just Gordo telling Lizzie how he felt, then she says, "I love you, too", and they all live happily ever after. Life's not that simple. And yes, I do believe Lizzie liked Gordo long before "Bye Bye Hillridge Junior High". 

No one asked, but the title of the previous chapter refers to an episode of the Simpsons (New Kid On The Block), when Bart falls for an older girl who is part tomboy. She says she's going to give him a Hertz Donut, then punches him, and says, "Hurts, don't it?" Original title of last chapter was just "Love Hurts" but that's too plain. 

The two reasons why I almost didn't do this story are: 1) if I write about stuff that did air, people will get mad if I don't write it exact. and 2) there are still unaired episodes that could factor into the storyline, but if I just make stuff up, then it could be totally different than what really happens. Of course, all this so far is made up... 

You may not like this, but I'm going to fast forward the story a bit to the last couple months of school... 

I hope what's coming isn't seen as completely out of character for anyone, but it will all be explained. 

Disclaimer- I do not have any connections with Disney, Ren-Mar Studios, or any of the cast and crew of Lizzie McGuire. This is written solely for your (and my) enjoyment. 

On to Chapter 7. 

Things Are Now Back To Abnormal 

  


------------------------------- 

Gordo was able to put the house back together before his parents returned, but he still didn't know what quite to do about Lizzie. He also had recieved an email from Miranda on Christmas evening, but his was slightly different... 

_ Gordo,   
I got them to give me back my PC so I could send a couple of quick messages, and turn off some of my daily joke lists and stuff, or my email will be full in a week.   
I just wanted to thank you for being there, you are a good friend. Someday I'll be able to tell Lizzie what's going on, but not now.   
See you back in school in about a week.   
--Miranda-- _

He talked to Lizzie on the phone, but made up excuses when she asked him to come over, or meet at the Digital Bean, etc. He just felt that he couldn't handle being with Lizzie without Miranda around. 

Lizzie was disappointed that she heard very little from her friends the rest of vacation, but Gammy McGuire stayed until the day before she was to return to school, so she wasn't exactly bored. 

When school resumed, they were again the Three Musketeers. Some days went slow, others sped by. Miranda did not tell Lizzie what had happened over Christmas, and did not try to play matchmaker, well, not much. She occasionally came up with excuses to leave the two of them alone for a few minutes, but either it wasn't long enough, or Gordo couldn't think of a way to express himself before she returned. 

When Parker McKenzie started to get chummy with Gordo, he decided to ask her out to the dance. She turned him down, saying he was too short, and Lizzie and Miranda were surprised at how it affected him. In the end, Gordo, Miranda, and Lizzie attended the dance together, as friends, but still Parker and Gordo shared a dance.

Lizzie couldn't understand things she was feeling, thinking. She kept telling herself Gordo was just a friend, and she was after Ethan Craft. But Gordo kept creeping into her thoughts, and Ethan kept ignoring her... 

At the second dance of the year, Lizzie took the blame for defacing the statue of a former principal, and was not allowed to attend the dance. Gordo did not attend either, and brought her some refreshments, so that they could have their own little party. In fact, close to the whole school showed up at Lizzie's, including Ethan. Unfortunately for Gordo, this meant he couldn't have any kind of "moment" with Lizzie, but hoped it showed her that she had more friends that she previously thought. 

Soon after, there was a dance where the girls ask the guys, and Gordo encouraged Lizzie to ask Ethan. Of course, Miranda got upset at this, why would he give Lizzie away? Gordo knew the chances of Ethan accepting were slim, but if he turned her down, maybe that would stop her from pining after someone she couldn't get. Or, it would make things worse, but Gordo didn't have a 4.0 average for nothing... He saw how Ethan had attended the impromptu party at Lizzie's, as a friend, nothing more. 

He even helped her change her image for Ethan, so that she'd be everything he wanted, down to having the same hobbies, and liking the same music and books. Ethan finally had his eyes opened a little, and told Lizzie that while he was flattered she'd go through so much trouble for him, he still saw her as a friend. 

Lizzie didn't even try to ask anyone else, and no one asked Gordo. Miranda wouldn't say if she was successful in finding a date or not, but she didn't attend the dance either. All three of them ended up at Lizzie's and staged their own little dance. As Lizzie's continued efforts to attract Ethan failed, Gordo was there to console her, but inside he said to himself that every time he turned her down, there was a smidge more of a chance he had at winning her affections. So, of course, he was there to comfort her when she should have been at the dance. 

They started dancing far apart, but Lizzie allowed Gordo to hold her a little closer, and while it felt strange to her in the beginning, in a way, it felt right. She caught him looking intently at her, not staring, but almost admiring. She looked back at him, and started to lose herself in his eyes. She couldn't decide if they were blue or gray, but it didn't matter. He had beautiful eyes. She couldn't do it any longer. He was her friend, and he was a boy, but that was all. She shook her head to rid her mind of such thoughts, and flipped her long blonde hair in the process. 

To anyone else, it looked as if Lizzie was simply flipping her hair out of her eyes. But that move made Gordo melt inside. She was absolutely perfect, and he had told her so, but she didn't get how much he meant it. She let Kate's assessment of her take priority, and she was convinced Kate was a 10, and herself a 3. 

Gordo wasn't blind. He knew that physically Kate was something, but her attitude and personality made her looks count for nil. Kate never picked on Gordo as much as she did Lizzie or Miranda, but her picking on any of them was enough to drop her rating in his eyes. While he didn't fully comprehend love until the last couple of years, he thought that he had loved Lizzie most of his life, if not all of his life. No matter what she looked like, or did, it didn't change his feelings for her. He knew she was very, very attractive, but he considered it a bonus. He knew the outside person didn't matter as much as who one was inside. 

One day, a famous TV star visited Hillridge Junior High, the star of Malcolm in the Middle, Frankie Muniz. Frankie asked Lizzie out, and Gordo told her to turn him down, but to his surprise, Miranda encouraged Lizzie to accept. 

Lizzie and Frankie went out a few times, but the pressures of dating a TV star soon got to Lizzie, and Gordo and Miranda didn't get to hang out with Lizzie any more. She realized that Frankie was just a normal guy, and she couldn't stand all the paparazzi attention, and she missed her friends. So, they decided it was best to keep in touch, but just as friends. Frankie even gave her a part in a TV movie he was in, and let Gordo and Miranda on the set. He told Gordo to take care of Lizzie, she was special, and gave him a wink, as if he knew there was something between the two of them. 

Miranda kept getting pursued by Larry Tudgeman, and was told by Lizzie he wasn't so bad, so she gave him a chance, but ultimately decided he wasn't right for her, or vice versa. 

Matt, Lanny and Melina again became friends, Melina said she was just "experimenting" and wasn't ready for anyone to be her boyfriend just yet. While Matt believed her, he knew he'd have to watch Lanny a little more carefully than he used to. 

Lizzie grew to appreciate her mother's taste in clothing when a pair of bargain jeans almost helped her win the title of best dressed. She could never return her Christmas presents, so now she started to wear them, even out of the house. 

Gordo continued to talk to Miranda about her problems, but it was growing harder to keep from Lizzie. They tried to chat and instant message each other, but once Lizzie found them online, and joined in the chat, and Gordo almost sent Lizzie a message meant for Miranda. 

Miranda begged Gordo to create a private chat, so that they could continue to talk without Lizzie finding out. He was reluctant to do so, but created a private area. The two of them even created alternate handles, so that they could talk without Lizzie being able to find them. He hoped Lizzie would understand when she found out that all he was doing was talking with Miranda, it wasn't like it was a secret romance or anything. Still, Gordo decided it best to get proof, so he started to save emails, and print them, and the chats, just in case Lizzie ever asked. 

One day, Miranda said she was going to "visit a sick aunt". At least, that's what she was going to tell everyone else, and Gordo was to back up her story. With all that was happening, more than ever he begged Miranda to tell Lizzie what was going on, or to give him permission to reveal her secrets. She told him that it was too late now, that things would have to drastically improve before she'd tell Lizzie, after she got past her problems. Gordo told her that didn't make sense, that bringing Lizzie into her confidence would help her overcome her troubles much quicker, and what would Lizzie think when she found out Miranda and Gordo had been keeping so much from her? 

But Gordo was careful not to push too much, because he didn't want to leave Miranda friendless, at a time when she needed a good friend. He also knew that with Miranda gone for awhile, it was again his best chance to tell Lizzie how he felt. If only he could stop chickening out... 

** A/N Yawn. Was that ok? I hate having to rehash stuff everybody knows, but gotta move this story along... I hope you'll bear with me until I get to the meaty part of this story, but I'm afraid it may be too unrealistic for some. **

Anyways, review if you like, or email JP5683 @ webtv.net or @msn.com with thoughts/comments. 

Depending on how my new computer behaves, I might have to next part up by Tuesday, but probably not until Wednesday night/Thursday morning. 

Thanks,   
JP 

March 11, 2003 


	9. Who Needs Dear Abby? Gordo, That's Who

** A/N Sorry if you are annoyed by the fact I haven't revealed Miranda's problem. It WILL be revealed, just not yet. **

There are things I've written, that factor into the story later, but no one is asking about them. I'll let you figure out what they are. 

Disclaimer - I do not work for/with Disney/Ren-Mar Studios, or anyone involved with Lizzie McGuire. 

On to Chapter 8. 

Who Needs Dear Abby? Gordo, That's Who 

  


--------------------------------------- 

Soon after Miranda left for her aunt's, Hillridge Junior High had, you guessed it, ANOTHER dance. Gordo wondered why they would hold so many dances, they could do so much more with all the money they spent, to expand the science lab, or the library, or get better computers, anything is better than 4 dances in a year. 

Lizzie was able to attend this time, but she chose to DJ. So, she wouldn't actually have to get a date. Gordo would attend, but dateless, and help Lizzie. 

The dance went well, to put it mildly. Lizzie enlisted Gordo, and even Matt, Melina, and her parents in an elaborate scheme to help get more Lizzie and less Kate in the yearbook, and amazingly, they pulled it off. 

It was hard for Lizzie to make it to school on time with Miranda gone. Sure, her parents would check to see she was up, but their idea of when she needed to be up was later than the time she wanted to be awake. Most of the time, Miranda would call Lizzie early in the morning, and they would discuss their warddrobe for the day, among other things. 

One day, Lizzie was late to school, more than an hour. She found the class just letting out. Gordo had assigned everyone jobs on the school online newspaper. She thought surely he'd saved her a _ primo _ job, since he was the editor, and she, his best friend, but he didn't. 

For once, Gordo was out of ideas. He couldn't believe he had forgotten Lizzie, but didn't know what job was left for her. The school advisor wasn't much help. 

The idea of an advice columist came up, and Lizzie grabbed it. She wasn't sure at first she wanted her name on it, if the students knew who was giving the advice, they might not write, but it all worked out 

She felt she was genuinely helping people, and visualizing who the writer of each question might be was fun. A few days later, a girl came to Lizzie and told her the advice didn't work. As this was the first time she knew of that her advice backfired, she decided maybe she should quit the column. 

Gordo begged her to reconsider, then relented if she'd answer just ONE more letter to fill out the next "issue." Lizzie scrolled through the list of email. "Hmm," she thought. "Twenty-five questions, I should be able to answer one of these, shouldn't I?" She tried to think up good advice, but she kept seeing her advice turn into problems. In frustration, she deleted all the questions, hopefully anything new would be easier to handle. She talked to her parents, and they convinced her that she wasn't giving instructions, just suggestions, and not to worry about what could happen, just to give the best advice possible. 

Meanwhile, Gordo was waiting for the question to finish the e-zine. No one knew it, but he could access the files from home. Since he was the editor, he had access to the questions as well. He saw how many emails she'd discarded, without even opening. He thought of returning them to "new", so she'd have to pick one, but came up with a devilish idea. He deleted the few questions that had appeared recently, and stayed on, deleting any new questions while posting one of his own. This was somewhat risky, but he was getting desperate. 

Lizzie tried to find Miranda for help on what to do, but she wasn't online, so she logged into the "Dear Lizzie" mailbox, and told herself she was going to answer a question! She only found one question. She couldn't believe it. It had been like 2 hours! It must be some sort of sign... 

"I'm going to answer this no matter what", she convinced herself. She would not try to visualize who the sender was, it would be easier to answer. It was a very tough question.

"Dear Lizzie, I think I may like my best friend as more than a friend, what should I do? Signed, Confused Guy." 

She thought and thought, then sent off a reply into Gordo's editor box. 

He was almost asleep when he heard the beep and his heart did a flip when he saw that his letter had been answered. He read the reply, but didn't quite get it. What would he say to Lizzie tomorrow? 

Lizzie slept well, knowing that her assignment was complete. She woke up extra early the next day, and when she entered the computer lab, she found Gordo already there, setting up her last column. He thanked her for finishing the assignment, and when she said she hoped her advice had helped, he halfway confirmed it. She wondered how he would know. 

He thought if she couldn't figure it out by now, he'd just blurt it out. But before he could, another girl came in to walk with Lizzie to her next class. He tried to catch his breath, he'd make another moment! But, once again, he was chicken, and made an off-hand remark about her giving "great advice". As he watched her leave, he felt he'd never be able to tell her, and if he did, what was the use? 

Kate walked in a few minutes later, and found a stunned Gordo. She saw what was on his screen, and had seen Lizzie leaving before, and kind of figured things out. She started to give him a smile, and realized that wasn't part of her normal behavior, and she didn't want to make him suspicious as to why she'd actually be nice to him... 

"Earth to Gor-dork. IMPORTANT people need to use the computers!" He snapped out of his trance, and saw what was on his monitor. He quickly closed all the programs he'd been using, and hoped Kate hadn't seen anything she shouldn't have. He gave up the computer, but came back after she left to work a little more. He couldn't stand it anymore. He needed to talk to someone. Someone who could help him be a little more obvious to Lizzie. He needed Miranda... 

** A/N I don't care much for this chapter or the previous, but have to include them. I promise the next will be much better. That's why I updated quickly, to get this part done. Review or email JP5683@webtv.net or JP5683@msn.com Thanks! **

March 12, 2003 


	10. Chat Sessions And Sad Songs

** A/N This story is PG, Miranda's problem can't be THAT serious... And yes, I'll give you a couple of hints here,and there, but you'll have to keep reading to find out the full story, or don't. There are over 900 Lizzie stories on here, pick another if you want. **

But I must be doing something right, 30 reviews in less than 2 weeks? I promise, the story is going to get a little more interesting. There wasn't much dialogue in the last two chapters, too much narration. And I know "Dear Lizzie" was a pivotal episode in the L/G G/L storyline, but y'all know what happened, why whould I write it all out? 

There are other parts of the story that raise a question or two, that no one is asking about. But, if you can't find 'em, oh well. 

I never said Kate was more attractive/beautiful/cute than Lizzie. Most people (including Lizzie) probably think so because Kate's a cheerleader, and until the end of the second season, uh, was "bustier" than Lizzie. I think Lizzie wears too much eye makeup, and lip gloss, but I'd pick her over Kate anyday. 

More songs here in this chapter, but I'm not listing them until the end, or you may figure out how they are to be used. 

Disclaimer- I have zero connections to Disney, Ren-Mar studios, or anyone/thing to do with Lizzie McGuire. All lyrics used are property of the respective artists, labels, ASCAP/BMI, etc. 

On to Chapter 9. 

Chapter 9 

Chat Sessions And Sad Songs 

  


--------------------------- 

Gordo had to be careful. He was still at school, and these PC's were monitored. He locked the door to the computer lab, and was about to get online, but decided it too risky. He left the lab, and went on to his regular classes, only half paying attention as to where he was, or what he was doing. He managed to get through lunch with Lizzie, then told her he had a big project, but he'd talk to her later. 

He hurried home after school, and went online. He prayed Miranda was around. He found she was, and convinced her to go to the private chat... 

** A/N Screen names totally made up. Have NO idea what their id's were/are. **

RandaPanda: Gordo, what's up? You're never on at this time. What's the matter? 

GordyPorgy: I wrote a letter to Lizzie's advice column, telling her I thought maybe I liked my friend as more than a friend, 

RandaPanda: What? That's great! And she knew it was you, and you're a couple now, and everything worked out fine! 

RandaPanda: I'm so happy for you! 

GordyPorgy: No, she didn't figure it out. She answered that I should follow my heart, well, my heart knows what it wants, but my mouth won't cooperate! I tried to admit it was me, but I just couldn't. 

RandaPanda: Wow. I'm sorry Gordo. I guess you've got to hit her with something more for her to notice. As to what, I'm stumped. A brick? 

GordyPorgy: Well, I'm getting desperate, but it isn't the first time I couldn't get her the message. Hey, how are you? Sorry, I was too upset to ask... 

RandaPanda: I'm much better, but I'm tired of being here all the time. They won't let me out, they say to protect me from myself. 

GordyPorgy: Well, that's why they sent you there, isn't it? 

RandaPanda: Yeah, but now they are talking about sending me to Mexico for awhile to think things over. If that happens, I might not make it back in school this year. 

GordyPorgy: Bummer, But face it Miranda, things could have been a lot worse. I mean, I thought you were ok after Christmas, and here it happens again, and the next time could have been much worse. 

RandaPanda: Yeah, well there won't be a next time. But, they don't believe that. Tell Mr. Dig thanks again, will you? 

GordyPorgy: Please, please can I tell Lizzie what's going on? 

RandaPanda: No. Listen G2G, somebody's gotta make a call. CU L8ter. 

Gordo thought hard about his life. Why was it all so complicated? Why did he go along with Miranda's pleas to keep this all so secret? Because, just like he couldn't intentionally hurt Lizzie, he couldn't hurt Miranda either... "Oh, sh--!" He suddenly remembered. He was supposed to talk to Lizzie right after school. She wouldn't be home later. He logged on under his regular handle, in the regular chat area. 

DGord has just entered the room. This room now has 17 members. Welcome DGord. 

LizzBlizz: Gordo! Where have you been? 

DGord: Hi, uh, busy with homework. Just dropped in to let you know I'm ok. Have fun at dinner with your parents, see you at school in the morning, k? 

LizzBlizz: Wait! Gordo! Don't leave so fast! 

DGord has signed out, this room now has 16 members. 

"That was strange", thought Lizzie. "He knew I'd be here waiting, and he just blows in and out. He sure is acting weird lately. Dad won't be home for an hour, what do I do 'til then?" Nobody else in the chat seemed to be talking to her, so she logged off... Should she call Gordo? No, best to leave him alone. She pulled out her portable CD player, and a Backstreet Boys CD. What were they saying? She didn't quite know... She tried to sing along, but didn't know much more than the chorus, and that meant something to her.... 

_ I don't care who you are, or what you did, as long as you love me... _

Probably didn't mean what she thought, but that one line, she wasn't even sure if that was the exact words, but still... Would she ever find anyone who felt that way about her? Who would accept her for who she was? She knew all signs were pointing that it wouldn't be Ethan, but who? 

Gordo was also deep in thought, for about the 900th time today. He lied, he had no homework, but he didn't know what else to say. His parents had upgraded his computer,as promised, and he'd downloaded several tracks that he thought had meaning to how he felt, about himself, and Lizzie, and more. Most of these were made LONG before he was born, but it's like they KNEW even then, what his problems would be. Someday, he hoped to play some of these for Lizzie, but she wasn't one to usually pay attention to lyrics. And some didn't apply yet, they were songs about what he DIDN'T want to happen in their relationship, whether it be as friends or more. 

He felt disappointed, misunderstood. How could he get Lizzie to know what he was feeling? He opened the folder titled, " What I Can't Say"... 

_ I don't know why I love you, but I do. I don't know why I cry so, but I do. I only know I'm lonely, and that I want you only. I don't know why I love you but I do. _

That didn't quite fit. He knew why he loved her. She was everything he'd ever want or need. But he WAS lonely. He switched tracks. 

_ I'm dying inside, and nobody knows it but me. _

Well, he was dying inside, but that song was about a guy who was pining over the girl he no longer had. He switched tracks once more. 

_ I'll never let you see, the way my broken heart is hurting me. I've got my pride and I know how to hide all my sorrow and pain. I'll do my crying in the rain. _

Well, that fit better. He always had to put on a brave face. Only Miranda knew how much he felt for Lizzie, and he suspected even she didn't realize how deep his love for her was. Every time, he had to hear about Ethan, or Frankie, or Ronny, or Danny, or WHOEVER, he couldn't say what he felt. He had to live with it, and express his pain later, alone. Still, it was a song about a guy wanting a girl he no longer had. He heard his parents pull up in the driveway. Damn, that meant he had to eat with them tonight. He shut down his PC and went out to greet them. He composed himself first. It was like that last song he'd listened to, and two others he continually got mixed up. 

_ If there's a smile on my face, it's only there to fool the public, if you look closer it's easy to trace the tracks of my tears. _

** A/N Hope that wasn't too, I don't know, sappy? Yes, I meant to combine lyrics from two songs at the end. They are both quite similar, and by the same artist... Next chapter up don't know when... review or email comments to JP5683@msn.com **

Thanks!   
JP 

List of songs in this chapter:   
Backstreet Boys - As Long As You Love Me   
Clarence "Frogman" Henry - I Don't Know Why (But I Do)   
Tony Rich Project - Nobody Knows   
Everly Brothers - Crying In The Rain   
Smokey Robinson & the Miracles - Tears Of A Clown   
Smokey Robinson & the Miracles - Tracks of My Tears 

March 13, 2003 


	11. The Party Of The Year? Maybe Of A Lifeti...

** A/N Before I wrote the last chapter, I was considering abandoning this story. I didn't know if I could get it where I wanted it to be, or if it would be worth it. I took 3 days off, and came up with what in my original draft is Chapter 7, and here is Chapter 9. (Ten if you count the Author's Note.) This story has been finished since the end of February. **

Yesterday I got an email from one of the best writers here telling me they might stop reading my story because of different things, and an anonymous reviewer calling me "ignorant beyond all hope of education." If I hadn't revealed my age at the beginning, you wouldn't probably wouldn't be so upset with me. But I did, oh well. This whole Miranda thing came about because I was annoyed that in all the Miranda-less episodes, EXCEPT for Bye, Bye, Hillridge High, they just mention Miranda's absence then never talk about her again. They don't even mention her in the Christmas episode. 

When I said it couldn't be that serious, I was referring to the fact people think I am going to make Miranda pregnant. It's not serious as in, having long-term effects unless she refuses help. The starvation diet thing was VERY serious, and that also factors into what I will write. And no, I don't think any of this happened to Miranda on the show. It's FICTION. I said something happened at Christmas, then later. And could happen again. 

Like I said, you don't have to read this story, nobody's forcing you. That may seem a strange attitude for me to take, but it's the truth. If you don't like what I'm saying, then find another story you like better. I'm not trying to please everyone here. I will say this story is about halfway complete. Give me time, and I'll explain everything. 

I will say Miranda is NOT pregnant, something happened, and she's simply depressed. It's not that she can't tell Lizzie what's going on, it's that she's hidden it so long, that she feels she can't say anything about it, until she feels she's over it. She knows Lizzie could have helped her, but it's too late now, and Lizzie will be upset either way when she finds out, so might as well tell her after the fact, and give her some good news that everything is resolved. 

Only one person knows what I've written, and I haven't received a response to what they think of it, but that's ok. There is a method to my madness, and if you stay tuned, you'll be clued in... 

I tweaked the last chapter a little, I did put at the end that even Gordo knew Lizzie didn't pay attention to lyrics, so uh, she just heard them wrong. 

Disclaimer - I have no connections to Disney, or any of the companies associated with Lizzie McGuire. 

On to Chapter 10. 

Chapter 10 

Party Of The Year? Maybe Of A Lifetime 

  


-------------------------------------- 

Matt could hear his sister crying. Should he try to talk to her? No, she'd probably think he was just going to pick on her. He wasn't that mean. He wasn't serious about most of his insults, it was just his job as her little brother. She was probably crying over some guy, most likely Ethan. Matt knew Ethan was a good guy, and a good friend, but she was just after him for his looks. How could Lizzie be so shallow? If she could only open her eyes, she'd see that she had a guy who loved her already. 

Yes, even Matt knew the way Gordo felt about Lizzie. He felt like Gordo was like a big brother, or if you will, brother-in-law, to him. A couple of times, when Lizzie and Miranda had been off doing, "girl stuff", he and Gordo had hung out, and though Gordo wouldn't actually admit it, he sensed that Gordo wanted his friendship with Lizzie upgraded to a different type of friendship. Lately, it seemed as if Gordo's feelings toward Lizzie had intensified x1000. 

Huh, if Lizzie would just shut up for one minute about Ethan, maybe she'd realize how good she had it. He hoped when he was Lizzie's age, he could find someone for himself that cared for him as much as Gordo did for Lizzie. Maybe it was Melina, maybe not... 

He went downstairs for a snack, and his Mom revealed to him a plan that Kate and some of the other kids from Lizzie's school had come up with. It was so crazy, it just might work. Matt didn't play that big a part, but he'd give it his all... 

Ethan was trying to call a few friends and tell them Kate's plan, but everyone was hanging up on him. Larry Tudgeman was his last call, and he seemed annoyed that Ethan would bother him. He'd have to just ask all involved to meet after school, and hoped Lizzie and Gordo would play along. 

Lizzie was pre-occupied when suddenly, there was Ethan. She didn't quite know what he wanted, and when he started to ramble about "bug gas", she was really lost. "Bug gas. Bugs get it from eating spicy food." She thought this only to herself, she couldn't tell Ethan that. 

A/N That's the only line you'll find from "Toon Lizzie" here, I love that line. 

He told her all about how he was scheduled to have a murder mystery party, but now it had to be cancelled, because his house had been tented. He was going to invite her too... Wait, an invitation to a party at Ethan's? How about a party by Ethan? It didn't have to be AT Ethan's. She couldn't believe what she was volunteering. "Uh, you could have the party at my house, Ethan." 

"Great!" He seemed relieved, and happy. He told her all about how it was to be staged as a wedding, but someone would die (at least she hoped it would be pretend), and everyone would have to solve "whodunit". "This should be interesting. Wonder who else is coming?" she thought as she ran to her next class... 

She met Ethan in an empty classroom after school, where she was to meet the rest of the "players". Lizzie wasn't surprised at the first participant, Kate Sanders, but was at the rest of the list... Larry Tudgeman, Kate's cousin Amy, Veruca, and he asked if Miranda could make it, but Lizzie said, no, she was still out of town. Gordo heard, but still was sworn to secrecy about Miranda's whereabouts. 

They then began to pick parts for the party. Ethan, as host, picked first, and drew the name of the groom. Gordo picked second, and drew the name of the bride, and was allowed to re-pick, and picked the part of the groom's best friend. Larry picked next, and as instructed, took his time, making an elaborate show of cracking parts of his body. When Lizzie yelled at him to "just pick", that was his cue to add the names of rest of the characters to the mix. Everyone was marked, it was planned who would be who. Kate, Veruca, and Amy all picked, then it was Lizzie's turn. Only one name left. Lizzie was the bride. 

Gordo tried to hide the way he felt, as Lizzie danced around. She seemed so giddy, as if this is what she'd always dreamed of. When the classroom cleared, he confronted her. "This is going to be another party where everyone drools over Ethan, and I get to play the low-key best friend no one notices," he grumbled. "I'll just be a footnote." 

Lizzie looked at Gordo, "People notice you. and if you win, I will totally notice you. But, I've been reading Nancy Drew books all my life, and I'm going to win." 

Gordo got an idea. "But first, you'll have to beat the low-key best friend no one notices. Stiff competition." 

For the rest of the week, Gordo barely saw Lizzie, he couldn't stand to hear her say how wonderful it was for her to be the bride, and Ethan the groom. He talked to Miranda, and she confirmed what she had earlier said was a possibility, she wouldn't be back until summer. But she was doing much better, and even doing her school assignments, and would be able to graduate to high school as well... 

When Gordo arrived at the party, he admired everyone's costumes. He was surprised to see Mr. and Mrs. McGuire in costume. He thought Ethan's stepmom was supposed to supervise. Lizzie looked great, as always, and he laughed inwardly that Kate was cast as a "nice" lady who wrote children's books. It hurt to see Lizzie walk down the aisle with Ethan, but it didn't really happen, of course. Mr. McGuire played the guy who was poisioned, and the game was on. He'd get Lizzie to notice him now, or die trying... 

Lizzie was amazed at how quickly the game moved. She didn't notice that Gordo and she seemed to be the only ones trying to sove the mystery, but she did notice that Gordo was increasingly rude, stealing all her clues. Even Matt had to jump in, and attempt to embarass her... 

The "cast" did as instructed, they mingled, and pretended to get clues, but let Lizzie and Gordo do the bulk of the work. Larry seemed smitten by Veruca, and Amy looked bored. Ethan had his hands full trying to keep his stepmother from embarrasing him. Everyone knew now why he had to ask the McGuires to help... 

Lizzie found "the clue" and declared she was going to reveal the killer before "that lousy Gordo" beat her to it. Kate saw Lizzie's frustrations, and acosted her, in character, before she could return to the main party. "Tsk, Tsk. So very gifted at solving mysteries, yet so very blind to what's happening in front of her own nose." 

The last thing Lizzie needed now was Kate picking on her. She didn't understand what Kate was getting at. Kate broke character. "Why do you think Gordo's behaving this way?" 

"Because he's obnoxious, and he wants to win." Lizzie said. 

"Well he's human too, he's probably just tired of being treated like a doormat. Why does he want to win?" probed Kate. 

"Because he wants to impress people, and be noticed." said Lizzie, matter-of-factly. Duh, it wasn't that hard to figure out. But, Kate kept pushing. 

"That's partly it. Who does he want to notice him? You, that's who!" There, she'd said it. 

Lizzie still didn't quite get it. "He wants me to notice him? Why?" 

"Hell-lo! Everyone at school can tell, except probably you. Gordo's had a crush on you, since like, forever! You've just been too busy paying attention to Ethan. He thinks if he wins, you'll pay attention to him!" Kate stopped suddenly. Here she was yelling at Lizzie, but she was helping her as well... She had to get out of here, and let Lizzie deal with what she'd said. "Do yourself a favor. Pay attention to Gordo, and I'LL pay attention to Ethan!" She stormed off, leaving Lizzie with a muddled state of mind. 

Lizzie couldn't comprehend what Kate had said. No, she couldn't be that blind. This was GORDO, after all. He was just her best friend, always had been, and that's the way it always would be, or would it? Should she let him win, and see if what Kate said was true? But would that mean she felt the same way about him? She had to get back to the party.

Lizzie addressed the group, and started to explain the last clue she had found. She looked over at Gordo to see his reaction, and she wanted to believe he was angry that she was going to win, but he looked sad, about as sad as she'd ever seen him. Should she let him win? At the last second, she named the wrong suspect, and Gordo sprang to attention. 

"He did not do it!" He explained her last clue, and said, "It was the maid that killed him!" Mrs. McGuire, in character, admitted to her part, and Mr. McGuire, who was still very much alive in real life, had to keep her from getting carried away... Everyone but Lizzie gathered around Gordo, to offer congratulations. 

After many pats on the back for a good game, it was time for Gordo to leave. Lizzie walked with him to the door, and they stopped to talk. "Congratulations, old chap. You did well." 

Gordo convinced her she did good as well, and she was very impressive. "But, you won," she said. 

"Uh, I shouldn't care what people think," Gordo admitted. 

"Well, you impressed me," Lizzie said, as she smiled at him. 

"I-I did? Why wouldn't I want to impress you? You're my best friend!" Gordo was getting very nervous. 

Lizzie didn't know what to say. "So, I impressed you, and you impressed me. It's all good." 

"Yeah, all systems go." Huh? What did that mean? Gordo didn't seem to be able to make sense. It was true, Gordo LIKED liked her. Gordo started to inch closer to Lizzie. She stood her ground, wondering what Gordo would do. 

"Uh, Lizzie, I was wondering, do you think?" He couldn't finish. 

"Yes?" She waited. What would he say? 

"Maybe sometime we could, you know, we could..." Gordo was interrupted when the door opened and Mr. McGuire peeked out. 

"Lizzie! You're missing the eel cooking compitetion!" Only Mr. McGuire would get so worked up over Iron Chef. 

"Dad, dad, dad," she thought. "Now, I'll never know what Gordo was going to say or do." "Uh, I'll be there in a minute, Dad." He smiled at the two kids, and closed the door, and went back to his eels. 

Lizzie looked at Gordo. He'd tried so hard, and the moment was ruined. She adjusted her costume, and faced Gordo again. She'd give him another chance. "Maybe sometime we could WHAT, Gordo?" 

She seemed to be interested in what he had to say, but he just couldn't say what he wanted. "Uh, nothing, Just maybe we could do this again sometime. It's your turn to win." He gave her a half smile. 

Lizzie knew that wasn't what he wanted to say, but decided not to push him further. "Sounds good." She waited, and Gordo offered nothing more. "So, I'll see you later?" 

"Yeah, I guess. Later." He turned and walked away, headed for home. 

Lizzie watched him leave, and resisted the urge to tell him she knew of his feelings for her. "It's official. He likes me. But he's just my friend. At least, that's the way I've always thought of him," she tried to convince herself. But why did she feel the way she did? Flushed and light headed? She had had enough fresh air, she'd better get back inside, and relax. She turned and went back inside. This could be a LONG night. 

** A/N About 2 or 3 more chapters until we get past "the kiss" from Bye Bye Hillridge Junior High. This story WILL go past that. Stay tuned, please. The "murder mystery is a set-up" is not entirely my idea, I read about it online somewhere... **

The next chapter is back to being all my own work, and not just mostly a summary of an episode. For those still reading, thanks. Review if you like, or email JP5683 @msn.com or @ webtv.net 

Thanks,   
JP 

March 15, 2003 


	12. Everybody Hurts Sometimes Everybody Crie...

** A/N Thanks for the reviews and comments everyone, really. If you are signed in when you review and have your email listed, you might receive mail from me. I will reply to all mail sent to JP5683 @msn.com or @webtv.net **

This chapter has a few songs in it, they are listed at the end of the chapter. 

Disclaimer- I have no connections, now or ever to Disney, Ren-Mar Studios, etc. I'm just a lowly peon who happens to be a fan of Lizzie McGuire. Don't own any of the show or characters or whatever... 

All songs used in this chapter are property of the respective artists, labels, agents, writers, etc, and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 11. 

Everybody Hurts, And Sometimes, Everybody Cries 

  


------------------------------------------------

Kate had made such a big deal about "having to play the nice one", but in reality, she had created her character. In fact, this whole thing had started as her idea. It wasn't long ago that she had been friends with Lizzie, Gordo, and Miranda, so she had known for awhile how Gordo felt. Seeing how Gordo reacted after Lizzie's reply to his letter, she actually did want to help. 

She knew Lizzie wouldn't accept an invitation that Kate would give her direct, but she probably wouldn't refuse Ethan. And she didn't. Gordo would go because Lizzie had accepted, Larry and Veruca knew what was up, and Amy just accepted because Kate had never told her mother exactly what had happened at her birthday party, just how out of hand it had gotten, and she used that as leverage for a favor from Amy. 

She'd never admit it to anyone, but she was scared about leaving Jr. High. Sure, she had repeatedly said she had a spot on the cheerleading team, because she had connections with the varsity squad, but was her connection for sure, and definite? 

Was it worth trying to be popular in high school, if it meant she had to alienate more possible friends? Not that she didn't have friends, but she wondered how true they really were. Lizzie and Gordo and even Miranda had once been her true blue friends, but she felt they could never be so again. If she could do things over, she would. She cried herself to sleep that night, just as she had many nights. She'd have to keep up the front a little longer, at least... 

Matt lay awake, just thinking. His big part of the night was to guard the door so that Lizzie and Gordo weren't interrupted. If only he hadn't drank 3 bottles of Cardio Punch... He just left for a minute, and in that minute, his father spoiled everything. Of course, Mr. McGuire was the only one who took part in the night's activities and didn't know the underlying plan. He hoped by the time he started to date, his father would get a clue... 

Lizzie just couldn't get the events of the night out of her head. What Kate had said had originally shocked her, but thinking on it, it wasn't SO shocking after all. She'd had Gordo as her first crush, and honestly believed she'd loved him then. But, she'd never told him, and moved on. To Danny, Aaron, Ethan, Ronny, Frankie, and even Larry. She'd actually only been serious about one of those, and it was a very short relationship. 

How many times had Gordo been serious about a girl? Two? Brooke and Parker? His relationship with Brooke didn't last much longer than her relationship with Ronny, and really nothing much happened with Parker. He'd never gone on and on about a girl, as Lizzie and Miranda did about Ethan. Was he hoping she'd notice him? Had his attempts with Brooke and Parker been legit, or just done to see Lizzie's reaction? 

Many, many thoughts swirled through her mind. She slept restlessly, and her dreams only brought more questions, and she couldn't tell if they were pleasant or nightmares. She'd temporarily given up trying to interpet anything... 

Gordo was also tossing and turning. Upon arriving home, he'd played many of songs from his "Lizzie Mix" CD he had now created, from songs on his PC. But now, the songs seemed to be making fun of him, and his inability to express himself. 

_ 'Cause every time I close my eyes   
I think of you   
And no matter what the season nears   
I still love you   
With all my heart   
And I wanna be with you   
Wherever you are _

I only think of you on two occasions   
That's day and night   
I'd go for broke if I could be with you   
Only you can make it right 

Lizzie seemed to be occupying all his thoughts. His grades had yet to suffer, but it was only a matter of time... 

_ Falling in love is such an easy thing to do,   
And there's no guarantee that the one you love is gonna love you.   
Oh, lovin' eyes they cannot see a certain person could never be;   
Love runs deeper than any ocean,   
You can cloud your mind with emotion.   
Everybody plays the fool, sometime,   
They use your heart like a tool.   
Listen, baby, they never tell you so in school   
But everybody plays the fool. _

Was he a fool? He had gotten closer tonight to revealing himself than ever before, but what if she'd laughed at him? What was he going to do anyway? Did he have the nerve to steal a kiss? Would she have kissed back, or slapped him? 

_ I don't love her, I try to tell myself   
But you can see it in my eyes   
So don't deny, I can't fool no one else   
The truth is in the tears I cry _

'Cause if it isn't love   
Why do I feel this way   
Why does she stay on my mind   
And if it isn't love   
Why does it hurt so bad   
Make me feel so sad inside 

He could no longer deny what he felt. The longer he remained silent, the more pain he caused himself. He had to figure out a way to express himself, or he'd bust. 

_ I've told every little star   
Just how sweet I think you are   
Why haven't I told you _

I've told ripples in a brook   
Made my heart an open book   
Why haven't I told you 

Friends ask me "Am I in love?"   
I always answer "yes"   
Might as well confess   
If I don't they guess 

Maybe you may know it too   
Oh my darling if you do   
Why haven't you told me 

Miranda was the only one to whom he had admitted his feelings. But he'd been asked several times if he and Lizzie were just friends, or more. What should he say now? 

_ I love you, I love you, I love you   
Yes I do but the words won't come   
And I don't know what to say _

I should tell you I love you, I do   
The words should explain but the words won't come   
I shouldn't hide my love deep inside   
The words should explain but the words won't come 

I should tell you just how I feel and I keep try-y-y-in'   
But something holds me back when I try to tell you 

Of all the songs he had selected that said it best. Simple and straightforward. Why was it so hard to admit something so true? 

_ I'll say goodbye to love   
No one ever cared if I should live or die   
Time and time again the chance for love has passed me by   
And all I know of love is how to live without it   
I just can't seem to find it _

At this song, he had shut off the music. That was just depressing. That was one of those "worst case scenario" songs. Things were NOT that bad yet, and he hoped they never would be. 

In an attempt to put his mind elsewhere, he picked up the book Miranda had given him for Christmas. Miranda. Could she be of any help? He checked his watch. 2 AM! No way, would she be online now, but he could send an email and she'd get back to him tomorrow. 

Miranda was watching an old movie, dubbed into Spanish. She'd seen it several times before, she figured it would be a good way for her to learn a little of the language. On screen, someone got shot, and the sound awakened her 1 1/2 year old cousin. She picked up the child, and tried to calm her... Quietly, she made her way to the den, and turned on the family computer. It sounded silly, but the screen savers fascinated the baby. The ever-changing patterns transfixed the girl, and soon she was asleep. Miranda returned her to her crib. 

Since the PC was already on, Miranda decided to go online, and check her email. Hmmmm, message from Gordo... 

_ Miranda,   
I almost told Lizzie tonight. School is almost over and I have to say it soon... Will you please do me a favor and be online for me after school for an hour each day this week? _

Friday's the last day of school, and a half day so instead of 3:15 we get out at 12:30. 

Please? Let me know ASAP 

Your buddy,   
Gordo 

Miranda sighed. Of course she would be there for him. She'd have to bribe her cousins to stay away from the PC for that hour, but after all he'd done for her, it wasn't that big a deal. She'd probably let Lizzie in on everything very soon, but it would go from "probably" to "definiely" if Gordo had success 'wooing" Lizzie, so to speak. 

But should she be the one to tell Lizzie, or Gordo. She just couldn't. It would have to be Gordo. This could be an eventful week, to say the least. 

Jo and Sam McGuire had finally cleaned up the last of the party. Lizzie and Matt had both been in bed for hours, now it was time for them to turn in as well. "That party tonight was a lot of fun, honey. We should do stuff like that more often." said Mr. McGuire. 

"Yeah? Well, next time, stay dead!" she laughed. "I meant in the game!" 

Her husband laughed and gave her a hug and kiss. "Gordo was really something, wasn't he?" 

"You aren't the only one who thought that way, you know." She gave him a wink. 

"Huh?" Jo rolled her eyes. Sam was SO clueless sometimes. 

"Didn't you see how Lizzie was behaving after he left? And to think, you had to ruin everything with your stupid eels!" 

A light bulb seemed to come on in his head. "Wait, do you mean?" He couldn't finish the sentence, but Jo knew he finally figured it out. 

"Yes. This whole thing was a ruse to get Gordo and Lizzie to admit to each other and themselves how they really feel about one another. Completely set up." 

Sam sighed. "When they were little, we used to joke about this, but now it seems to be actually happening. I wondered how long it would take. Should we watch them a little more carefully from now on, or act as usual?" 

"Sam, parents always say they know exactly how their kids feel, but in reality, we can't know all. We've known Gordo long enough. I think he can be trusted, but we shouldn't get too lax. Let's give them a little space and see what happens, let things happen as they will." 

Jo was very wise. Sam was so appreciative of his wife. He agreed with her, wholeheartedly. They both headed for the bedroom, but sleep wasn't on their minds. Their kids were. Matt would be experencing some of the same problems sooner than later. 

None of the participants in the mystery game slept well that night. 

** A/N Well? **

Next chapter, "Bye, Bye Hillridge Junior High" JP style to be up soon. 

As always, review, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net. 

Your input, while in no way required, is greatly appreciated. 

Thanks,   
JP 

Songs in this chapter 

The Deele - Two Occasions   
Main Ingredient/Aaron Neville - Everybody Plays The Fool   
New Edition - If It Isn't Love   
Linda Scott - I've Told Every Little Star   
The People - I Love You   
Carpenters - Goodbye To Love 

March 16, 2003 


	13. Kiss Me Kiss Me Make Me Say That I'm In ...

** A/N WoW! Thanks for all the reviews. More than 20 in 3 days? I thank you very much. This chapter may not be much, but it will get really interesting at the next. I researched hundreds of songs for this story. I was thinking of putting some MP3's online for everyone, because I think they are too big to send by email. But I don't have much available webspace. **

Ramble, ramble. Did you know I'll hit 20,00 words with this chapter? 'course the notes are kinda long... 

I know in the party chapter I kinda skipped ahead a little fast, sorry. When I decided which episodes to write chapters around, I basically copied down what happened, then tried to add a little more of what they were thinking... 

I stretched out the Christmas part a little much. 

There are more "flashbacks" coming starting here, but I'm trying to only include what's necessary. Sorry. 

I finally signed up for "support services" Couldn't before, it wouldn't clear a lousy $10 grrrr. Oh well... 

"Rox" LOL... That's why I tried to make it clear. They weren't thinking THAT. 

A little plug here... Go check Lizzie stories from Keeponwritin and hiddenwriter Two VERY gifted authors... 

Disclaimer - Just a fan, have no connections with the show or etc. 

All songs used are property of respective artists, labels, writers, agents, etc and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 12. 

Chapter 12 

Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Make Me Tell You I'm In Love With You 

-------------------------------------------------------- 

Sunday it started to get HOT. If the public pool had been open, Lizzie, Gordo, and a bunch of others would have gone, but it wasn't open yet... 

Gordo waited Sunday for a call from Lizzie, but it didn't come. If they had gone to the pool, he knew how much attention she'd attract. She always had boys turn their heads when she walked by. 

He kept listening to songs he had found... He HAD to find a way to get Lizzie to hear some of these. They said what he felt so much better than he ever could. 

_ I hear a voice in my mind   
I know her face by heart   
heaven and earth are moving in my soul   
I don't know where to start   
tell me, tell me, the words to define   
the way I feel about someone so fine   
how do you talk to an angel   
how do you hold her close to where you are   
how do you talk to an angel   
it's like trying to catch a falling star _

He simply could not tell Lizzie. Wait, yearbooks were coming out this week, maybe he could write something... But what? He turned off the music to think... 

Lizzie didn't know what to do. She was still shook up over the party. She convinced herself that since Gordo didn't say he liked her, then it must not be that serious. Still, she started to rethink things when she heard the following from her mother's radio... 

_ If you change your mind, I'm the first in line   
Honey I'm still free   
Take a chance on me   
If you need me, let me know, gonna be around   
If you've got no place to go, if you're feeling down   
If you're all alone when the pretty birds have flown _

Honey I'm still free   
Take a chance on me   
Gonna do my very best and it ain't no lie   
If you put me to the test, if you let me try   
Take a chance on me   
Take a chance on me   


We can go dancing, we can go walking, as long as we're together   
Listen to some music, maybe just talking, get to know you better   
'Cos you know I've got   
So much that I wanna do, when I dream I'm alone with you   
It's magic   
You want me to leave it there, afraid of a love affair   
But I think you know   
That I can't let go 

NO, NO, NO! It wasn't meant to be... She refused to listen to any more music, it got her mind all mixed up. She kept herself busy that day, and didn't give Gordo another thought. 

Monday started the final week of school. Lizzie was very, very excited to be almost out of Jr. High. She came bounding downstairs singing a simple little song: 

_ I'm going to High school! I'm going to High school!" _

She bumped into Matt who had for some reason slept in the kitchen. As soon as Matt was gone, she started up with her song again... 

"Not yet!" Her father cut her off. 

She looked at him, puzzled. He continued. "First you have to graduate Junior High." 

"Duh, Dad, of course," she thought, but didn't dare say... Her mother looked like she was about to cry. She started to bawl. 

"First it's high school, then college, then you get married, have kids, and we never see you again. Whaaaaaa!" Jo knew she would do fine next year, but things were changing so fast. Lizzie told her parents to relax, and got ready to leave for school. 

Lizzie walked in to school with Gordo, and again began singing her little ditty. 

He held his hands over his ears, and begged, "Please! Another song!" While he loved to listen to Lizzie, a five word song got old rather quickly... 

She stopped as they approached their lockers. There were flyers posted by high school students all over the place. The flyers were composed of threats, about what happened to lowly fresh meat, err, freshmen. 

Kate Sanders walked by, tearing her paper in half. " I hang out with the captain of the varsity cheerleading squad. These rules only apply to people like Gor-dork and Loo-zie." 

She was stopped by the principal speaking over the intercom. "Attention, yearbooks will be available tomorrow. Please bring your school ID to receive them." 

Kate turned back to Lizzie and Gordo. "Too bad Miranda's not here, you could have each had TWO signatures in your yearbooks." 

Lizzie reminded Kate that she had left early to vacation with her family in Mexico. Gordo remained silent. When Kate was gone, Lizzie turned to Gordo, with a sad look on her face. 

"Kate's right, Gordo. I am a loser." She sighed loudly. 

Gordo couldn't take it when Lizzie beat herself up. "No, you are NOT! Don't listen to what Kate says, you are so much better than that! Don't worry, high school is going to be great!" 

Before they knew it, the day was over. Lizzie went home, and went straight to bed. Her parents were worried about her, she never went to bed after school. 

Her father came to talk to her. She showed him "the rules" the high school students had posted, and he laughed. He told her not to worry, she'd be just fine. Then he began to name all the things she had accomplished in the last two years. 

"Dad! I didn't really do good at any of those!" If he was trying to make her feel good, he'd have to do better than that. 

"That's okay, honey. Maybe not, but you tried. That's what's important." He left her alone to her thoughts... 

The following day, they received their yearbooks. Gordo and Lizzie sat off to the side, in a stairwell, poring over them. Some good things had been captured, and some not-so-good things were also featured. 

When they got to pics of the big food fight, Larry Tudgeman appeared behind them. "Yeah that pudding sure was good." 

Larry was a weird guy. A nice guy, but definitely traveling to the beat of a different drum. "Sign my yearbook?" He held out the book to Lizzie. 

"Sure!" She took the book, and thought for a minute... She spoke the words as she wrote... "You ate worms, and beat me out for class president. You surprised me and ended up being a great date. You are so Tudgeman, and I am so glad." 

She handed his book back, and watched him walk off... "There goes the only boy who ever truly liked me in Jr. High. Now I get to go get rejected by a whole new group of guys." 

"Say something, Gordo!" Both of them thought at the same time. "Uh, what about that Ronny guy?", Gordo said before he realized the impact of his words. "Smooth, real smooth. Stupid stupid!" Gordo told himself. 

"Thanks for bringing up Ronny, Gordo!" She got up in a huff, and began to sign another student's yearbook... 

Gordo thought back to when Lizzie and Ronny had been going out, the pain he had felt, and when she told him of their breakup. He'd simply said Ronny was a jerk for breaking up with her, and he'd told her no one else was prettier or more fun to be with. He'd almost told her of his feelings then, but stopped short. Something had told him it wouldn't be right. He started to bang his head against the railing, and yet another song came to mind. 

_ Here I stand head in hand   
Turn my face to the wall   
If she's gone I can't go on   
Feelin' two-foot small   
Everywhere people stare   
each and every day   
I can see them laugh at me   
And I hear them say   
Hey! you've got to hide your love away _

He looked up, Lizzie was looking at him strangely. "Gordo, are you okay?" 

He tried to cover what he was thinking... "Uh, yeah, just a little headache. Can I sign your yearbook?" 

Lizzie smiled. "OK! It better be good though!" 

"Oh, it will!", he assured her. But he had no idea what to say. 

The next day, he still had her book. It was now Wednesday. Time was running out. He had scribbled notes at home, wanting to practice first. All attempts had been silly, or corny, or rejected for other reasons... He paced back and forth, and almost bumped into Tudgeman. 

"Let me guess, lady troubles?" Gordo didn't say anything, so Larry pushed a little more. "It's Lizzie, isn't it? She's some dame. Take my advice, stay away, she's a heartbreaker..." 

"Thanks, Tudgeman, but I don't need your pity." Even Larry could sense how Gordo felt. How could he make Lizzie understand? 

Larry walked away, saying he'd be there, if needed. Gordo thought back to how he felt when accidentally saw Ronny kiss Lizzie. How he had reacted, and Miranda didn't believe him then, when he said he wasn't jealous. He was. He had to make this good. He started to write. 

_"Dear Lizzie," _

Lizzie appeared from nowhere, and was still upset about high school, and getting picked on. He again told her not to worry about it. Ethan popped up to get his yearbook signed, and Gordo blanched. Surely, she was going to write something sappy in his book... 

Ethan told her to hurry up, he had cheerleaders waiting. Suddenly, Lizzie changed what she was going to do, and wrote a simple, "You rock, don't ever change." Ethan gave her book back, read his, and was surprised to see they each had written the same thing. He told her next year he was going to play team sports, she'd better root for him, then he was off to the cheerleaders. 

Lizzie again wondered if she'd be anything in high school. Gordo said it didn't matter if she was whatever in high school, she'd be ok. She said that Ethan was going to be a jock, and Kate a cheerleader, and she didn't matter. 

Gordo told her for all her faults, at least Kate had been paid back several times for her attitude. Lizzie thought of a few. Kate falling into a cake, a lake, slipping on banana peels, and getting covered with chili, and getting an entire bowl of punch poured over her head. Lizzie started to laugh... 

"I like it when you laugh, " said Gordo, and he meant it. Lizzie blushed, and he took back her yearbook once again. 

That afternoon, Lizzie was sitting home, contemplating things, when Gordo came by. They thought of all the fun they'd had, and all the fun ahead. Again, he reassured her, that she was a good person, even to her enemies, and she was a good friend. 

"Don't worry, I got your back McGuire." And they both knew it was the truth. 

Gordo had finally decided what to write. He had been inspired by the late, great, Ricky Nelson, and the wisdom of Billy Joel... 

_ Fools rush in where angels fear to tread   
And so I come to you, my love, my heart above my head.   
Though I see the danger there   
If there's a chance for me, then I don't care   
Fools rush in where wise men never go   
But wise men never fall in love, so how are they to know? _

If he was a fool, then so be it. But like the song said, if he had even the slightest chance, then he HAD to go for it... 

_ You're a big boy now   
You'll never let her go   
But that's just the kind of thing   
She ought to know _

Tell her about it   
Tell her everything you feel   
Give her every reason to accept   
That you're for real 

Tell her about it   
Tell her all your crazy dreams   
Let her know you need her   
Let her know how much she means   
When you love someone   
You're always insecure   
And there's only one good way   
To reassure 

Why was it so crazy? He picked up his pen, and started to write. 

Thursday, he didn't see Lizzie until lunch, and Lizzie joked that he'd had her book for a month... 3 days, a month, it was still too long. He told her he was almost done. 

Someone asked Gordo to sign their book, and he left his and her books on the table, cautioning her not to look at it, it wasn't ready. Of course, this only perked her curiousity more... 

She sat down, and decided a peek wouldn't hurt... 

_ Dear Lizzie,   
You rock, don't ever change. And only, I really mean it. _

"Aww, that's sweet," she thought. "Wait, why? That's what everyone seems to be writing." It was sweet, because he really meant it, nobody else seemed to. She continued to read... 

_ We've been best friends for as long as I can remember, we've shared everything together, and so I finally think I should share this with you.   
I really, really like you, a lot, and I think you're beautiful, both inside and out. I can honestly say I wouldn't be the person I am, without your friendship.   
There is nothing to be afraid of if we have each other, I will always be by your side.   
Your friend always, and hopefully more, if you want,   
Gordo _

Lizzie was stunned. He did like her. He couldn't say it aloud, but he'd poured out his soul on this paper... She thought back on all the times he'd been there for her, through the good, the bad, and the crazy. She realized no matter what the problem, he was always there to help, and never asked for anything in return. What could she do now? 

She was jolted out of her thoughts by the principal saying it was time for the class picture. She put down the book, and joined the group, standing next to Gordo. Suddenly, she was worried. She turned to Gordo, and asked, "Promise me that we will always stay close to each other even in high school!" 

He said just what she wanted to hear. "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere." 

"That's so sweet!" she thought again. "I've got to do something to let him know it's okay that he likes me, and I think I like him back. I wish they'd hurry up with the photo!" 

An idea popped in her head, and she tried to dismiss it. No, it was crazy. No, it was just right.. She took a deep breath, and kept stealing glances at Gordo... 

When the photographer said, "Three!", and snapped the picture, she planted a kiss on the cheek of a very surprised, and very glad Mr. Gordon. 

** A/N Whew! That was harder than I thought. Lots of lyrics here... Next chapter to be up early Friday morning. As always, review if you like, or email me at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net **

Messages will be replied to, and anyone whose reviews include an email address will receive a reply as well. 

Songs in this chapter: 

The Heights - How Do You Talk To An Angel   
Abba/Erasure/A*Teens - Take A Chance On Me   
Beatles - You've Got To Hide Your Love Away   
Ricky Nelson - Fools Rush In   
Billy Joel - Tell Her About It 

Thanks!   
JP 

March 19, 2003 


	14. One Day They're Just Friends, Then Someb...

** A/N Again, mixed reviews. Thanks to "the Kid", and therealxenocide. I emailed them, (as I do everyone who leaves an email), and they helped a bunch. To those who say I am just rewriting episodes, there are only 4 chapters I did that. **

I did not like covering them as much as you might think, but not everyone has seen every episode, there are those who only watch on ABC, or are not in the United States, or new viewers, and there will be more people discovering the show after the movie's release. 

And I tried to add a little, give a little different spin on things, show it from a different character's perspective. From now on, there will be references to past events, but it's almost all fiction from here on... 

Part of Miranda's "problem" is revealed here, finally, but there will be an entire chapter devoted to it later. There is MUCH more to it. 

I have no problem with negative comments, but one person was reviewing the "after party" chapter, and they said it wasn't original, they had seen it before. I don't THINK so. 

I know I won't please everyone, but I hope this chapter is better. I'm now registered with "Support Services" (finally), so I can see how many hits I get, and it you want you can get alerts when I update.

As for Gordo's yearbook inscription, that was the aired version plus the script version. In the episode, you can tell Lizzie's still reading, but it's up in the air as to what the rest says. 

Disclaimer - I own nothing. Do not work for Disney or Ren-Mar studios.

On to Chapter 13 

Chapter 13 

One Day They're Just Friends, Then Somebody Bends Unexpectedly 

  


-------------------------------------------------------------- 

Nobody actually saw the kiss, not even the photographer, but Kate saw Lizzie straighten up, and Gordo's goofy smile. She quickly whispered something to Ethan, who blurted out, "Yo Gor-DON! Congratulations! You da man!" 

Ethan always seemed to speak without thinking. Kate pulled him off to the side, and several other students began to disperse. The photographer would not be able to retake the picture. Kate couldn't help smiling at Lizzie and Gordo. She tried to snarl at them, but it was impossible. She walked off with Ethan. 

Lizzie felt faint, what a rush! She couldn't believe what she had just done! She had kissed her best friend, and let the whole school in on it! Was that good, or bad? She wanted to laugh, and at the same time, to cry. The latter seemed to be winning... 

Gordo was shocked. It could just be a friendly gesture, but he hoped it was more. He looked over at Lizzie, and saw she was on the verge of tears. He summoned his voice. "Thank you, Lizzie." 

That was all he could say? Lizzie looked at him, then the ground, then him again, managed a weak, "You're welcome", and hurried off. He watched her disappear, then went over to the lunch area. Lizzie's yearbook was in a different place than he'd left it. Oh no, NOW what had he gotten himself into? 

Lizzie and Gordo didn't see each other until last period. Lizzie arrived first, and sat near the front, where there were two available seats. A minute later, the empty seat was taken, not by Gordo, but by Gustav, the boy she remembered from the food fight incident. Gordo was nowhere to be seen. 

Mr Dig entered the room a moment later. "Since this is the next to last day of school, and you have no real homework, I'm going to assign you something for this hour." 

Groans came from all over the room. Nobody wanted a real assignment. "Quiet, class. I want you to---" 

He was cut off by the classroom door flying open, and Gordo rushing in. He took the only available seat, in the back. "Well, Mr. Gordon, nice to see you could make it." 

Lizzie couldn't help herself, she spun around to see Gordo, and then immediately turned back to the front of the class. Both parties turned red. The whispers she'd heard before, but ignored, grew louder, and she heard both hers and Gordo's names. 

"I said, QUIET class! Your assignment is this. Write at least 3 sentences about what you are going to do for the summer, and at least 3 sentences about what you WISH you were going to do for the summer. Please put your names on them, and turn them over when you are finished, or at the end of class. Begin." More groans, but everyone started to write. 

Lizzie put only her name on the paper, then couldn't decide what else to write. She stared at the paper, willing the words to appear. 

After 15 minutes or so, she felt a tap on her shoulder. Gustav handed her a note. Carefully, she opened it in her lap, after checking to make sure Mr. Dig wasn't watching. 

_ Lizzie, why can I say whatever on paper, but not out loud? I don't know. Anyways, I know you read what I wrote in your yearbook, and I have a feeling that contributed to what caused you to kiss me. _

She turned red, and checked to see if Mr. Dig was paying her any attention. He was filling out forms, so she continued to read. 

_ I have so much I want to tell you, but I need to do a few things first. Will you please meet me at my house one hour after school? Please nod your head for yes, shake for no. Gordo. _

Slowly she nodded. She folded up the note, pocketed it, and tried to concentrate on her assignment. She didn't know how much time had passed, before long, the bell had rung, and she was the only one left in class. 

Mr. Dig approached her... "Ms. McGuire?" 

"Aaaaahhhh! Oh, sorry, Mr. Dig, Hey where is everyone else?" 

"On their way home. Class was over 5 minutes ago. I see you didn't do the assignment." 

Before she could apologize, he spoke again. "That's okay, it wasn't for any grade. It was just to keep you busy. I know you have other matters on your mind." 

How did he know? "Yes, Lizzie I heard what happened at lunch, and it's okay, really. Care to see Mr. Gordon's paper?" He walked with her to the desk Gordo had been using, and flipped his paper. Drawn on the paper was a large heart, with lots of "Lizzie's" written inside... 

She blushed, and Mr. Dig laughed. "Ah, young love. How sweet it is. Go get him, and good luck!" 

Lizzie gave him a big hug. "Mr. Dig, you're wonderful. I'm really going to miss you next year." She almost started to cry on his shoulder, but he stopped her... 

"Stop that, missing a teacher is not allowed. Now, get! See you tomorrow." 

He watched her leave, and shook his head. So many things had changed since he was 14, but so many things remained the same... 

She gathered up her books, emptied her locker, and headed home on the late bus. Her mother was straightening up the living room when she walked in. "Hi, honey, what's up?" 

She couldn't hold it in. She started to speed ramble. "I kissed Gordo when they took the class picture, I think he wanted to kiss me the other day after the party, but then Dad messed up the moment, and then what he wrote in the yearbook was so sweet, it just hit me how much he must like me, and I started to think maybe I like him too, and I have to meet him in, EEK! 30 minutes! Tell you more later Mom, gotta get ready, bye!" 

Jo watched her daughter climb the stairs two at a time. She hadn't seen her so enthusiastic since, well Ronny, but that didn't last long. Even when she had dated Frankie she wasn't this frantic. She smiled. She liked Gordo, knew she could trust him, and hoped he was okay with the fact that Lizzie had been the one to possibly push their friendship to a new level. She knew things were going to get very interesting from that moment on. 

Gordo took the first bus, and made it home 10 minutes after school... To his surprise, his mother was in the kitchen, sipping tea, and reading the newspaper. She looked like a normal mother for a change. He made small talk for a minute, then she asked him what was on his mind. She never asked him that, and like Lizzie, he told his mother the whole story. 

When he finished, his mother told him she had expected this for years, and knew that he was intelligent enough to handle it himself, she had nothing magic to tell him. Anytime he needed her, or his father, they would be there, no matter what transpired. For the first time in years, Gordo hugged his mother. Finally she was talking to him like a son, not as someone to practice her profession on. He left the room, feeling ten feet tall. 

He had to talk to Miranda. Every day this week, she'd been waiting, and every day he had nothing new to share. She was online, but under her usual handle instead of the alternate. Gordo switched to his regular name as well. 

** A/N As I stated in a previous chapter, chat names are made up. **

DGord: Hey, what's up? 

MSanc: You're supposed to tell me. 

DGord: Well, something finally happened. I wrote my feelings in Lizzie's yearbook, and told her not to read it yet, but she did, and then when they called for the class picture, she kissed me on the count of three. 

MSanc: You sure it wasn't the other way around? 

DGord: No, she kissed me. I didn't ask her to, or anything. I hope it meant something. 

MSanc: You don't know? Didn't you ask her? 

DGord: Well, I couldn't. She's going to be here soon, and I'll talk to her then. How are you? 

MSanc: Ok, but still feel cooped up. Why won't they let me go out and shop or something? It's not like I killed someone or something! I'll be fine! 

DGord: Well, not all 14 year olds get ahold of fake id's, get drunk, or all the rest you know. 

Miranda couldn't believe he had just said all that. Since she had started to trust him with each of her "secrets", after telling him just once, they never referred to specific events again. She didn't want to think of what happened, just wanted Gordo to help her get past it... 

MSanc: Shut up! It wasn't all my fault! I told you not to remind me about it! 

DGord: Miranda, how can you expect me to help if we can't discuss the specifics? Please, can I tell Lizzie? 

MSanc: Why 

DGord: Because it's time she knew. She should have known from the beginning. Please? 

Gordo waited for a reply, it took a couple of minutes. 

MSanc: Ok, but, tomorrow, ok? Tell her about your stuff today, and me tomorrow? Let me try to contact her first. 

DGord: Thanks, Miranda. I gotta go. Gotta get some stuff ready before she gets here. Don't worry, everything will be just fine. Anytime you need me, I'll be here, and I know when you tell Lizzie, she'll say the same. 

MSanc: Bye 

DGord: Bye 

And Gordo was gone. Why had she kept it all from Lizzie so long? Because she felt since she didn't know in the beginning, she just couldn't fill her in after the fact. She knew now that had been the wrong attitude to take, but could she fix it? She started to compose an email to Lizzie, then noticed she had just signed on. What should she tell her? 

As soon as Lizzie came into her room, she'd changed clothes, then flipped on her computer. She had to talk to Miranda. She was surprised to find her online. 

LizzBlizz: Hey girl! What's up? 

MSanc: I should ask you that. So, what's it like to kiss your best friend? :-) 

LizzBlizz: Wait, how did you know? I didn't say a thing! 

MSanc: Gordo was just on like a minute ago. He told me everything. It's okay 

LizzBlizz: You don't think it's weird? 

MSanc: Lizzie, it was just a kiss. And even if it becomes more, no, it's not weird. I think it's been a long time coming. 

LizzBlizz: Meaning? 

Msanc: Meaning you two were made for each other. And I'm glad to have you both as friends. I'm sorry I haven't been as good of a friend to you as you to me, but I promise to make things better in the future. 

LizzBlizz: What do you mean? 

MSanc: It's too complicated to tell you now. I understand you have to meet Gordo this afternoon, you don't have time for me to talk to you now. Gordo can tell you later, but he's got enough on his mind for now. 

LizzBlizz: yeah, I gotta be at his house in 15 minutes. Can't you tell me a little? 

MSanc: All I can say is I'm sorry, and in the future, I'll tell you when something happens, and I will tell you everytime that I need you. Now, hurry up, don't keep loverboy waiting! 

Miranda signed off before Lizzie could respond. "That was weird", she thought. She had a feeling that she'd find out more about her two best friends in the next day or two than she'd ever thought possible, and she was right. 

Gordo was practicing what he was to say to Lizzie. Sure, he could say it now, to a mirror, but not Lizzie. He jotted down several notes, and if worse came to worse, a complete note to hand to Lizzie. 

Wait, what about the music? He hadn't even thought of it all day. He started to construct a new CD. If he couldn't tell Lizzie, maybe he could play a song or two for her... Did he have time to finish? He checked his watch. It was exactly one hour since school let out. She was never late. He hoped she hadn't changed her mind about coming over. He wrote some more notes as he waited for the CD to finish, hoping he'd hear a knock any second... 

Lizzie came downstairs to find her mother just relaxing. She couldn't tell if she was waiting for her or not. She tried to sneak past her... 

"Lizzie, come here please." Oooh, she was busted. Reluctantly, she walked over to her mother. 

"Honey, I know you're in a hurry, this will only take a second. I knew this day would come sooner or later, and I'm here for you, for whatever you need, or if you just need someone to listen. It will all work out just fine." She reached out for a hug. 

Lizzie gave her Mom the hug she requested. She hadn't expected that reaction. She left the house, and arrived a few minutes early at Gordo's. She didn't want to appear too eager, so she hung out in the park across from Gordo's house. She sat on the same swing she had spent so much time on as a child. So many times she had come here with Gordo. Not much with Miranda. 

She recalled many times just swinging away with Gordo, carefree. That was back when life was much simpler. She got into her thoughts and forgot to check her watch. 

"Oh, no! I'm ten minutes late!" She jumped from the swing, and slowed her breathing, collected her thoughts and bearings and crossed the street. She didn't quite know what to expect, but hoped she wouldn't look so nervous in front of Gordo. 

Gordo kept checking his watch. No Lizzie. He gathered his notes, and the CD, and left his room. He looked out the peephole of his front door. No Lizzie. He went to his parents room, and peeked out the curtain, where he could get a better look outside. No Lizzie. He was seriously considering that maybe she had stood him up, when he saw her walking up his driveway. She was breathing hard, but working to control it. She shook herself all over, then took a deep breath, and knocked. He ran to the door, out of breath, and yanked it open. 

"Lizzie! I was beginning to think you weren't coming! Please step inside." 

He held the door open, and motioned for her to come into the house... 

** A/N Dun-dun-dun-dun. What will happen? Check back soon to see. Next chapter should be up Monday night or Tuesday morning. As always, your input is not required, but is greatly appreciated. Review if you like, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net. If you include an email on a review, I will probably contact you. **

Thanks!   
JP 

March 22, 2003 


	15. Guess I'll Have To Say I Love You In A S...

** A/N I thought I was going to really get you guys mad after the last chapter. Glad to see I was wrong. **

This chapter was very hard to write. I spent hours and hours researching songs for this story, and could only use a fraction of them. Hope I picked the right ones. 

I hope I didn't give away too much, or make you get wrong ideas about what's up with Miranda after the last chapter. There is more to it. There are only 2 people who know what's coming, at least partly. Thanks to both of you, you know who you are. 

Yes, the title of the last chapter was adapted from a Beauty and the Beast lyric. Do you know where the title to this chapter came from? 

I'm surprised at how many people tell me I write so well, as each of these chapters was written in about a 2 hour block, in one sitting. Once I wrote three chapters in a day. The lyrics are being added as I type each out to post.

ANYWAYS! 

Disclaimer - Have no connections with Disney, Ren-Mar, etc. 

All songs/lyrics used are property of respective artists, labels, writers, agents, ASCAP/BMI,etc. 

On to Chapter 14. 

Guess I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song 

  


------------------------------------------- 

Gordo stood holding open the door. Lizzie tried to smile, but it didnt seem natural. She was too nervous. She looked around, it had been awhile since she'd actually been inside Gordo's house. He closed the door, and motioned her to follow him into the kitchen. 

"Cold drink?" He bent over into the refrigerator, and rummaged around. He was stalling. 

She didn't want a drink, but didn't want to refuse either. "Uh, yeah, sure, whatever, I don't care." 

He pulled out a small bottle of orange juice, and a can of apple juice. She took the orange juice, and watched as he popped the apple juice open, and drank half the can in one gulp. 

He looked at her, and tried to think. His mouth felt incredibly dry. He drank the other half of the juice, but it wasn't helping. He couldn't talk. He patted his pockets. Notes, notes, where were his notes? Oops, left them in his parents' room. "Uh, excuse me a minute Lizzie, I'll be right back, I promise." 

He left a stunned Lizzie in the kitchen, while he sped off. He mumbled as he ransacked the room. "What's the matter with me? If I can't talk to her, I'll never be able to show her exactly how I feel. I haven't been able to all this time, what made me think I could now?" 

He found the notes, and scanned over them. "Lame, lame, lame. These are stupid!" He made confetti out them. He was supposed to be so smart, why couldn't he say out loud what was going on in his heart? He picked up the CD. Why was he constantly thinking of music? Most of these songs he would have never listened to a year ago. 

Why? What did that song say? 

_ "You've got to be in love, to love a love song. You've got to be in love like I love you." _

Oh great, now he was thinking of the Brady Bunch. He remembered how it used to be one of Lizzie's favorite shows, but she hadn't watched it for awhile. 

He wrote a new note, and tore it up as well. Another attempt wasn't much better, but it would have to do. He folded it twice, taped it to the CD case, then went back to the kitchen. He gave the CD and note to Lizzie. "I-I'm sorry Lizzie. I just can't say what I want. I thought I could, and, and... Please, take these." She hesitantly took them, as he turned, went to his room, and slammed the door. 

She started to cry. Why was Gordo afraid to talk to her? She grabbed a paper towel from a dispenser above the sink, and wiped her eyes. It didn't look like he was coming back. She waited 5 minutes, then started to leave. 

Lizzie walked down the driveway, and crossed the street to go home. She took a detour back to the park. Again, she sat in "her" swing, as she opened the note. 

_ Lizzie,   
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I know I've said that a lot, but I am. Maybe an hour wasn't long enough for me to figure things out. Please listen to some of this CD, it will sort of explain some stuff. Please pay attention to the lyrics. Just give me one more chance tomorrow after school. I have a lot on my mind, and I guess I just can't figure out how to say anything at all, so again, sorry.   
Gordo _

She'd give him another chance. She'd give him ten chances if he needed it. What was so important about this CD? She didn't have any idea, but if it would explain what Gordo couldn't say, she'd do what he asked.

Gordo sat on his bed, staring at the wall. Why? Why was it so difficult? It wasn't like he couldn't talk to her about "normal" things. What was he going to say anyways? "Uh, gee, Lizzie, I really think you're cute, and nice, and I like you a lot?" 

Why had he wanted to play some songs for her? Because they described what he felt better than he ever could. But, he couldn't have had her listen to any of the songs while at his house. If he had played her some of the CD, it would have to be here in his room. Did he trust himself to be in his bedroom with her? He was insanely in love with her, he'd never hurt her, on purpose, that is. What if he couldn't control himself? Is that why he couldn't discuss his feelings? Was he afraid of what he might do if she rejected him? 

No, he'd have to talk to her in a more public place. The park across the street. It was deserted enough during the day to have a private discussion, without being too private. Tomorrow he'd have to talk, or else. 

Lizzie stayed there for at least 30 minutes, maybe an hour. She didn't bother to check the time. After awhile, she got up, and continued her walk. 

No one was home. She was alone with her thoughts, a blessing and a curse at the same time. She rummaged around for something quick to snack on. 

A short while later, her mother walked into the kitchen, to find her with a cooling pizza pocket, a bottle of juice, holding a CD, and gazing into the rainbow patterns on the back. 

Before she could ask what Lizzie was doing she herself was asked a question. "Mom, why do boys have to be so difficult?" She offered no response, as she knew it was purely a rhetorical question. 

"Mom, I went to Gordo's like he asked, and he clammed up. All he could do was give me this CD." 

"Well honey, sometimes boys just have a hard time expressing themselves. Gordo's a smart guy, and that CD is probably very important." 

Lizzie couldn't understand what could be important about a lousy CD, and why Gordo couldn't just talk to her. They'd always been able to tell each other everything, the good, the bad, the sad, the embarrasing even. She sighed, and posed another question.

"Is it ok if I skip dinner with you guys? I can eat this pizza pocket. I've got a lot to think about." 

"Sure honey, I know you do, and don't worry, like I said before, everything will be alright. If you want to talk, I'll be here, just let me know." She gave her a hug, and Lizzie walked slowly up the stairs. 

She went into her room, and pulled out her portable CD player. The CD wouldn't load. She flipped on her PC, and popped in the disc. Oh boy, MP3's. There could be hours here. She walked down the hall, and grabbed a small box of Kleenex, she'd need them. 

She plugged in her headphones, sat down, took a deep breath, and opened the main folder. A song automatically started. 

_ I can't fight this feeling any longer   
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow   
What started out as friendship has grown stronger   
I only wish I had the strength to let it show   
I tell myself that I can't hold out forever   
I say there is no reason for my fear   
'Coz I feel so secure when we're together   
You give my life direction, you make everything so clear   
And ever as I wander I'm keeping you in sight   
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night   
And I'm getting closer than I every thought I might _

And I can't fight this feeling anymore,   
I've forgotten what I started fightin' for 

The song came to an end, and she sighed."Wow, Gordo, you got right to the point." After that, what else could he say? A lot, it seemed. There were about dozen folders, plus at least 50 unassorted songs. 

She clicked a folder titled, "Why I Broke it off with Brooke". This should be interesting. It contained one song only.

_ We must have been stone crazy   
When we thought we were just friends.   
'Cause I miss you, baby,   
And I've got those feelings again.   
I guess I'm all confused about you,   
I feel so in love.   
Oh, baby, what can I do?   
I've been thinking about you. _

Wait. He's thought of her as more than a friend then? Then why hadn't he said so? 

_ Suddenly we're strangers,   
I watch you walking away.   
She was my one temptation,   
Oh, I did not want her to stay   
Deep down, I'm still confused about you   
_

HE was confused? SHE was confused... the chorus played out, and she exited the folder. She moved on to "What I Felt When You Went with Ronny". 

Again, one song. Wait, Weird Al? Yuck. Matt loved Weird Al. But she was curious. She had to listen to it. She braced herself, and double-clicked. 

_ Well I heard that you're leavin'   
Gonna leave me far behind   
'Cause you found a brand new lover   
You decided that I'm not your kind _

Sounded innocent enough, kinda like a doo wop song. 

_ So I pulled your name out of my Rolodex And I tore all your pictures in two   
And I burned down the malt shop where we used to go   
Just because it reminds me of you _

Wait, that was odd. Not a typical love song now... She listened carefully. It was sad, funny, and wrong at the same time. Would Gordo rather hurt himself than be with her? She didn't get it... Wait, she missed something... She backed it up a few seconds... 

_ I'd rather rip out my intestines with a fork   
Than watch you going out with other men   
I'd rather slam my fingers in a door   
Again and again and again and again and again   
Oh, can't you see what I'm tryin' to say, Darlin... _

She could see, yes. It hurt Gordo to see her with anyone other than himself. That's what the song was about. 

Her mind wandered for a few seconds, then she caught the last verse 

_ I'd rather rip my heart out of my ribcage with my bare hands   
and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it 'till I die   
Than spend one more minute with you _

She had no idea he felt so strongly. If only she hadn't gone on and on about boys. It was probably killing Gordo inside. She moved on to the folder titled "What I Felt When You Broke up with Ronny". She clicked on the second track. 

_ Hold on little girl   
Show me what he's done to you   
Stand up little girl   
A broken heart can't be that bad _

When it's through, it's through   
Fate will twist the both of you   
So come on baby come on over   
Let me be the one to show you 

I'm the one who wants to be with you   
Deep inside I hope you feel it too   
Waited on a line of greens and blues   
Just to be the next to be with you 

Build up your confidence   
So you can be on top for once   
Wake up who cares about   
Little boys that talk too much   
I seen it all go down   
Your game of love was all rained out   
So come on baby, come on over   
Let me be the one to hold you 

Was that was he was trying to say that day in the library? She clicked another track. Hey, she knew this one... She began to sing along...

_ You might've been hurt, babe   
That ain't no lie   
You've seen them all come and go, oh...   
I remember you told me   
That it made you believe in   
No man, no cry   
Maybe that's why _

Every little thing I do   
Never seems enough for you 

He had done so much for her. Was he simply trying to win her affection? 

_ You're just too blind, too see   
But in the end, ya know it's gonna be me   
You can't deny   
So just tell me why _

Why? she didn't know. She was blind. How could she have such a great guy be in her reach all this time, and not know it? 

Hmmm.... A folder titled "Parker - Delete this song" Huh? She found "Short People". She quickly backed out. She had no idea Gordo was that sensitive about his height. Why did he copy this song here? It clearly said "Delete"... 

She opened the "How I feel about you" folder. Oh, wow. There were as many songs here, as there were unsorted songs. Which to pick? She picked at random. A slow song started. Interesting, it was in Spanish. It SOUNDED romantic, though. She nearly fell off her chair when the English translation started. 

_ Believe me when I say how much I love you   
Believe me when I say how much I care   
Forgive me, give me peace of mind   
All I need is time to prove my love for you _

She believed. She clicked another. 

_ Earth Angel, Earth Angel   
Will you be mine   
My darling dear Love you all the time   
I'm just a fool   
A fool in love with you _

She couldn't even listen to the next verse. She was the fool. 

_ You might think I'm crazy   
To hang around with you   
Maybe you think I'm lucky   
To have something to do   
But I think that you're wild   
And inside me is some child _

You might think it's foolish   
Or maybe it's untrue   
You might think I'm crazy   
But all I want is you 

She didn't think him crazy. But her wild? Nah. She had been crying nonstop for an hour. She pushed on. 

_ My Cherie Amour, lovely as a summer's day   
My Cherie Amour, distant as the Milky Way   
My Cherie Amour, pretty little one that I adore   
You're the only girl my heart beats for   
How I wish that you were mine _

She was just bawling now. It was almost too much... 

Maybe someday you'll see my face among the crowd   
Maybe someday I'll share your little distant cloud 

Enough with that song. She clicked one more, the last, she didn't know if she could take much more. 

_ Maybe it's intuition   
But some things you just don't question   
Like in your eyes   
I see my future in an instant   
And there it goes   
I think I've found my best friend   
I know that it might sound more than a little crazy   
But I believe   
I knew I loved you before I met you   
I think I dreamed you into life   
I knew I loved you before I met you   
I have been waiting all my life _

There's just no rhyme or reason   
Only this sense of completion   
And in your eyes   
I see the missing pieces   
I'm searching for   
I think I've found my best friend 

He found his best friend? He'd loved her before he knew her? He'd known her almost his ENTIRE life! That was it, she simply couldn't cry anymore. She laid down on her bed to do some heavy thinking. She had worn herself out. She fell asleep with the computer running, and lights on. 

Jo sat and waited, and waited. She had told her husband what had happened, and talked him out of intervening. She warned Matt within an inch of his life to stay away from Lizzie tonight. Sam and Matt had started to watch the basketball playoffs after dinner, and Matt uncharacteristically went to bed at halftime. Sam followed suit around mid-3rd quarter, saying he just couldn't stay awake... 

It was rare for her to be the only one downstairs at this time. She watched the rest of the game, wrote the score on a piece of paper, and taped it to the refigerator. 10:15. She picked up the remains of a cup of coffee brewed earlier in the day, the newspaper, and a paperback, and headed upstairs. 

She noticed lights under both of her children's bedroom doors. It wasn't common, or unusual for them to fall asleep and forget to cut the lights. Meaning, she didn't know if they were awake or not, safer to think them as not, so she had to be quiet. Where was that squeaky floorboard? She'd have to avoid it... 

Matt had gone to his room early, not to sleep, but to think. He was surprised at how his mother had told him what would happen if he so much as even thought of bothering Lizzie. He would like to talk to her, though. So Gordo had given her a CD that said how he felt. Brilliant, simply brilliant. Maybe he could copy some songs and give them to Melina. It would have to be a cassette though, unless Lizzie let him borrow her computer, fat chance of that. 

Without Lizzie around, the night had been very dull. What would normally be a fantastic matchup was boring, without Lizzie there to ask why he bothered to watch "that dumb game". 10:10. He decided he had better call it a night, then nature started to call. He ignored it for a few minutes, then couldn't stand it anymore. He bounded out of bed, and down the hall. 

Jo McGuire had gingerly stepped around the offending squeaky area, and was almost to her room, when suddenly Matt came rushing at her. She stepped back, right on to the squeaky floorboard, as Matt just missed her, and he made the floor squeak as well. 

Some of her coffee splashed on the carpet, and Matt apologized as he ran into the bathroom, and slammed the door. She threw the newspaper on the spill. It wasn't a big mess, and she had wanted to have the carpets professionally shampooed for some time now. 

Matt rushed by her the other way, again apologized, and offered to give up part of his allowance for awhile to help pay for the cleaning. She shooed him away, and he went to his room. She turned and went to her bedroom as well. 

Lizzie woke up with a start. At first she didn't know where she was. She'd had several strange dreams, and wasn't exactly sure this wasn't part of another. She hadn't meant to fall asleep. Someone was out in the hall. She tried to ignore it. Finally it was quiet. She went to shut down her computer, then decided maybe she was up for another song or two. She almost had the headphones adjusted, when she heard a knock on her door... 

** A/N Longest chapter yet, with all the songs. No, I don't believe Gordo's a wimp for not being able to express himself. He's very much like I was. **

Next chapter up, Friday AM, I think. Plenty more to come! 

As always, review, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net with any comments. If you leave an email address with your review, I may contact you. 

Thanks!   
JP 

List of songs in this chapter 

Brady Bunch - You've Got To Be In Love To Love A Love Song   
Reo Speedwagon - Can't Fight This Feeling   
Londonbeat - I've Been Thinking About You   
Weird Al Yankovic - One More Minute   
Mr. Big - To Be With You   
'N Sync - It's Gonna Be Me   
Randy Newman - Short People   
Rene y Rene - Lo Mucho Que Te Quiero   
Penguins - Earth Angel   
Cars - You Might Think   
Stevie Wonder - My Cherie Amour   
Savage Garden - I Knew I Loved You Before I Met You 

March 25, 2003 


	16. How Can I Tell You That This Is Not A Pu...

** A/N Warning! Lots of notes here, and a long chapter too. Wouldn't blame you if you skipped ahead, to get back into the story, but I hope you'll read what I'm saying, errr, typing, here. **

Hello! Got an extra day off, so you get an update a few hours early. Kinda makes me sad though, if I update faster, I get to the end faster... If I had stuck to my original "post every 3 days" plan, this story would be ending about a week before the movie was to open. You figure it out. 

Anyone that's reading this before the movie, and thinks this won't/wouldn't happen, you are probably right. To anyone thinking that AND reading this after the movie, you are definitely right. But this is what I would like to see happen... Not the whole "Miranda's got a problem" thing, but the L/G G/L moments... 

To those who have found this story recently, or those who pointed it out to others, THANK YOU! I got as many hits in 24 hours for the last part, as I did in 72 hours for the previous. WOW. 

I stated waayyyyy back at the beginning I was going to keep posting, no matter what type of response I got, and that's true, but I really do appreciate everyone who's taken the time to review and/or email me. I've responded to every email, and every review with an email attached, even those who have reviewed multiple times. 

Yeah, the title of the last part was easy to figure the source, so's this... I can't fit all the songs I want in this story. Maybe in a sequel? Some that I thought of using, they don't quite work unless they are already in a relationship, or experience a breakup. There is a song in this chapter that I bet most of you have never heard, but I swear it's a real song, and I knew I had to use it, because of the fourth line, but couldn't figure out where. Hope it works here.

Of course, when I use "obscure" songs here, it lessens the impact of the words, but some I just couldn't leave out. There are hundreds of songs that could fit into this story, but while most of you like the songs, others probably think there are too many, and you are both right. 

I seriously considered cutting the last chapter when Lizzie fell asleep, and some of you probably think I should have. But it was at such an emotional peak, I thought maybe it would be best to change the mood a little before the end. I could still change it, but I think I'll leave it that way. This is just a continuation of the last chapter, starts right after it. There is another part here where I could cut it, but decided against it, for the same reason I didn't cut the last. 

Gordo IS very brave to give her the CD. I almost did the same thing to someone, but, it was a cassette, and, I chickened out. Of course, it WAS full of cheesy wannabe pop like "I wanna Be Your Boyfriend" by "The Party". Yuk! 

I'm glad you guys think I write well. All positive reviews for the last two chapters. I went back and tried to fix typos in the other chapters, spelling errors, paragraph breaks, missing words, blah, blah, blah. If anyone finds some I didn't fix, in ANY chapter, please email me and let me know. 

I know my story isn't 100% original, but not all of it has been done before. There are only so many ways to say certain things, and with close to 1,000 LM stories here at fanfiction.net now, there are bound to be similarities here and there. If you think I stole something from someone, I didn't mean to, this story was written a month ago, remember that. Of course, if anyone wants to use what I've done in a story, go for it. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, just don't go overboard, and take it all, k? 

Someone commented on their story it seemed weird to use a song sung by a female for Gordo, or a song done by a male for Lizzie. I was thinking the same when I started adding songs, but then I realized it really doesn't matter. The meaning of the song is the important thing. Your interpertation of these songs may differ from mine, but it's my story, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah. 

Am I talking too much? "Yeah, why don't you kiss her, instead of talking her to death?" Sorry, had to sneak in a line from one of my favorite movies, It's a Wonderful Life. I bet some of you are thinking the same about my story, why doesn't he just kiss her? Well, I'll say it's a 99.9% possibility to come up soon, but I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me! 

Disclaimer- I own nada. Have nothing to do with Disney, Ren-Mar Studios, etc. All song titles, lyrics, etc, are property of the respective artists, labels, writers, agents, etc, and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 15. Yes, finally. 

Chapter 15 

How Can I Tell You This Is Not A Puppy Love? 

  


-------------------------------------------- 

"Lizzie? Are you awake? Can I come in?"

It was her mother. Should she pretend to be asleep, or not? No, she could use her mother at a time like this. "Yes, Mom," she called out, but not too loud, as not to wake her brother or father. 

Jo had gone to bed, then returned, wondering if, since Matt had been awake, maybe Lizzie was as well. If she wasn't before, all the noise Matt had caused surely woke her up. She carefully opened Lizzie's door. The pizza pocket sat on Lizzie's desk, cold, forgotten. She had taken maybe two sips of the juice, then left it as well. Lizzie's trash basket was full of tissues. Lizzie's face was red and puffy, and was streaked with dried tears. "Poor baby!" she thought. "But, she's no longer a baby, she's becoming a beautiful young woman." 

Lizzie looked up at her mother, not knowing what to say. She removed the headphones, and sniffed several times, but she was out of tissues. 

"Oh, honey! Just a minute, I'll be right back." She went down the hall, emptied Lizzie's garbage, grabbed more tissues, and wet a washcloth. She passed by the coffee spill. It was beginning to seep through the newspaper. She dropped some of the tissues on the mess. Probably it wouldn't help, but couldn't hurt. 

She returned to Lizzie's room, and softly shut the door 99% of the way. Her daughter hadn't moved. She handed her the tissues, and started to wipe her face with the washcloth. Lizzie stopped her, and took away the washcloth, putting it off to the side, as if she wanted to let the tears stay there awhile. Neither knew quite what to say. 

Lizzie blew her nose, then wiped at her eyes. "Mom, do you think Gordo likes me, or loves me?" 

What a question. What kind of answer did that warrant? They were both just fourteen, but did true love have an age requirement? She tried to give her the best answer she could, but it was just speculation on her part, she couldn't answer for Gordo any more than she could for Lizzie. 

"Well Lizzie, I know there are many types of love, and I know he loves you as a friend. But, as for the kind of love I THINK you are referring to, it's very possible, but honestly, I don't think he truly would love you like that, unless you loved him back." She paused, and posed a loaded question to her daughter. "Do you?" 

"I don't know, Mom. It's just, it's just..." She couldn't finish the sentence. She was glad her mother had brought her fresh tissues, she needed some... 

"Those must have been SOME songs, huh?" 

All Lizzie could do was nod. 

"Can I see what songs he picked?" Jo knew more about computers than her family gave her credit for. She waited for a response. Lizzie had started to eat the petrified pizza. She paused, and moved to the bed, so her mother could sit down in front of the computer. 

Jo McGuire quickly scanned over the list of songs Lizzie had already opened. Of course, she didn't know all of them just by title, but the few she didn't know, just by reading the names she knew they were something special. She avoided re-entering the folders, they seemed a little too personal. She unplugged the headphones, set the volume, and scanned over the huge amount of unsorted music. She clicked one at random. 

_ When you're feeling lost in the night,   
When you feel your world just ain't right   
Call on me, I will be waiting   
Count on me, I will be there   
Anytime the times get too tough,   
Anytime your best ain't enough   
I'll be the one to make it better,   
I'll be there to protect you,   
See you through,   
I'll be there and there is nothing I won't do. _

I will cross the ocean for you   
I will go and bring you the moon   
I will be your hero your strength   
Anything you need   
I will be the sun in your sky   
I will light your way for all time   
Promise you,   
For you I will. 

I will shield your heart from the rain   
I will let no harm come your way   
Oh these arms will be your shelter   
No these arms won't let you down 

She turned, and looked at Lizzie. She had started to cry heavily again. She didn't want her to choke on the pizza, so she cut off the tune mid-song, and just read the titles instead. Wow, Gordo had done his homework. 

"Do You Believe In Us" by Jon Secada, "Can't Let Go" by Mariah Carey, "I Only Have Eyes For You" by the Flamingos, "Cupid" by Sam Cooke, "Just One Look" by Doris Troy, "Too Late To Turn Back Now" by Cornelius Brothers and Sister Rose, "I Swear" by John Michael Montgomery. 

Wow, wow. New songs, old songs, rock, r & b, country, soft, hard, it was all here. There were even a few hip-hop songs she didn't recognize. How incredibly romantic. Lizzie asked her a question, but she didn't hear. She turned. "What was that, honey?" 

"Did you ever hear of a song called "Short People", Mom?" asked Lizzie innocently. 

Wow, why was she asking about that? That wasn't in the list of songs that Lizzie had opened. "Uh, yeah, it's by Randy Newman, you know, the guy who did the music in Toy Story. Why do you ask?" 

"Well, I found it there, in a folder, and it was marked as something he was supposed to delete, but he didn't. So, I didn't think it was for me, and I didn't play it. What's it about?" Lizzie had a feeling, but she'd better ask. 

"Well, Lizzie, Mr. Newman said it was supposed to be a joke, but it made some people really mad. Something about short people being ugly, and having no rights to live, basically." 

Lizzie stared at her mother, not believing. "No! Why would anyone write such a cruel song? And why would Gordo listen to that nonsense?" 

"Well, like I said, he claimed it was a joke, but, I don't know the whole story. It did make #2 on the charts though." She paused before answering the second part of Lizzie's question. "Why would Gordo listen to it? I hope he doesn't think what I think he thinks, but it's hard on him, he's about your height, and look at the other boys in your class. A couple of them are six feet already. It doesn't change who he is on the inside, but he's probably very sensitive about not being at least several inches taller than you. At least, I hope that's all it is." 

Lizzie was already in shock, or else that would have hit her much, much harder. When he tried to get Parker to attend the dance with him, he'd tried to make himself appear to have more stature, but she thought he had gotten over it. By giving her this CD, it was almost as if Gordo had given Lizzie a long, hard look into his soul, if that was at all possible. She turned to her mother. 

"After checking the CD out, even just a little, NOW do you think Gordo loves me?" 

"Yes, I do, but it's still ultimately up to you whether you accept that love or not. It's in your hands." 

"But, Mom! We ARE just fourteen, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, what if, what if, we don't last together in the future? Next year, five years from now, or even twenty, thirty years away?" 

"I don't know, dear. I can't decide these things for you, but I promise to always be there, for Gordo, and for you. Or, if it happens, whoever else you invite into you life. I love you, and whatever you do I'll support you, as long as you are satisifed with where life takes you." With that, she turned back to the computer, and began to scan the song titles once again. She gasped. "Oh, Lizzie! Make that a definite yes. Gordo loves you, I'm sure of it. If he put this song here, he's serious."

"What? What?" Lizzie wanted to know NOW what song her mother was referring to... 

"It's the same song your father played for me when we were dating. In a way, it says the same thing that other song just did, but I'll let you listen, and decide." She clicked the track, and softly sang along with the simple tune. Lizzie had heard it many times, but now, there was actual meaning behind those words. Words meant for her. 

_ You and I must make a pact   
We must bring salvation back   
Where there is love   
I'll be there I'll be there _

I'll reach out my hand to you   
I'll have faith in all you do   
Just call my name   
And I'll be there, I'll be there 

And, ohhhhh   
I'll be there to comfort you   
Build my world of dreams around you   
I'm so glad that I found you   
I'll be there with a love that's strong   
I'll be your strength; I'll keep holdin' on 

Holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin' on   
Yes I will, yes I will 

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter   
Togetherness, girl it's all I'm after   
Whenever you need me   
I'll be there I'll be there 

I'll be there to protect you   
Yeah baby   
With a non-selfish love that respects you   
Just call my name   
And I'll be there, I'll be there 

And ohhhhh...   
I'll be there to comfort you   
Build my world of dreams around you   
I'm so glad that I found you   
I'll be there with a love thats strong   
I'll be your strength; I'll keep holdin' on 

Holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin on' 

If you should ever find someone new   
I know he'd better be it good to you   
'Cause if he doesn't   
I'll be there I'll be there   
Don't you know baby yeah yeah I'll be there I'll be there   
Just call my name, I'll be there 

Just look over your shoulders honey, ooohhh 

I'll be there I'll be there 

They both listened as the chorus faded softly away. 

"Mom, that was beautiful! But does it mean what I think it means?" 

"Well, honey, I don't know what you think it means, but I'll tell you what it means to me, that is, what I thought when you father played it for me." She paused, not sure if she should tell Lizzie everything, for she had been a senior in high school when Sam used it to describe his feelings for her, and she was then four years older than Lizzie was now. She decided Lizzie was able to handle it all. She took a deep breath, and slowly started to explain. 

"He loves you, he'll always be there if you need him, but if you ask him to back off, he will. If you get in trouble, he'll be there. If you tell him to go away, then need him, he'll be there. He just wants to be with you anyway he can, so if you decide at any time, that you love somebody else, he'll be there. Of course, it will hurt him not to be the one you love, but to see you happy is all that matters to him, because he won't make you do anything that would cause you pain, for it will cause him twice as much pain in return. If you choose another, and things don't work out, he'll be there to support and console you, hoping that he'll get one more chance with you, but he will never force you to make any decision against your will." 

Lizzie tried to soak all that in. It was almost too much to comprehend. "It's weird. We DID make a pact, today, in fact. We promised each other that no matter what happened to either of us, that we would always stay close to each other in high school." 

Her mother smiled. "Now that's exactly what I'm talking about. No matter what happens in high school, how many new friends you meet, whether you join clubs, or get jobs, or whatever, even if you chose another boy, and he, another girl, he will always be there when you need him most, and deep down, he will always love you." 

I guess I never knew how good I had it, huh? Guess I should have tried to open my eyes to him earlier." 

"Yeah, he's a real catch, and it's about time you figured that out!" 

Both mother and daughter turned to the door, at the sound of the voice. Both spoke at the same time. "Matt! What are you doing here, how much did you hear?" "Matt! Get out of here, you little creep!" 

"I came to apologize again for the mess out here, I heard enough, and I am not a creep!" 

Lizzie glared at her sibling. She didn't need insults right now. 

"Mom, can I talk to Lizzie alone for a minute, please?" Their mother hesitated, and looked at Lizzie. Lizzie didn't actually object, so she got up to leave. 

"Matt, be nice, okay? Let me know when you are finished, your sister and I have more to discuss." 

"Mom, trust me just once, please." As she left, he handed her $10. "It's all I have right now," he apologized. 

Stunned, she left the room, then hid around the corner, curious. 

"Lizzie, I didn't come here to insult you. I came to say I'm glad for you. I think Gordo and you being together would be great. I mean, you're always together anyways, just add kissing." 

Lizzie blushed. "Matt!" 

"Sorry, sis, but it's true. He'd also make an excellent brother-in-law." 

Lizzie blushed more, then threw a pillow at her brother. "Out, Matt!" 

"Okay, okay. Just don't tell anyone other than Gordo what I said, I don't want to ruin my reputation or anything. Well, you can tell Mom, but I'm sure she knows already, she's probably listening in right now." He tossed the pillow back, to Lizzie, and left the room. 

Jo McGuire quickly changed her position, but Matt knew she had been listening, and she apologized. "It's ok, Mom. Really." She hugged him, and he went back to bed. Both her kids were growing up fast, but rather nicely. She picked up the papers from the hall, stuffed them in the bathroom trash, which was now almost overflowing, then went back to Lizzie's bedroom. 

"Mom, Matt was just almost nice to me, can you believe it?" 

"Honey, after what's happened today, I can believe almost anything." 

"What mess was he talking about, Mom?" 

"Oh, nothing for you to worry about. You know how I've wanted to clean the carpets for awhile? Let's just say that now is the perfect time." 

Relieved that her mother told her not to worry, they again began to discuss matters of the heart. Finally, Lizzie was beginning to show she needed rest. It was just after midnight. Her unplanned nap had let her stay up a little more than usual, but not much. 

Jo kissed her daughter on the forehead, messed up her hair, and gave her a hug, again, reassuring her that, whatever happened, she'd be around to do whatever Lizzie needed her to do. She shut down the computer, turned off the lights, and said "Good night." 

Lizzie was tired, both physically, and emotionally. All the music she had listened to, brought back a song she thought she had long forgotten. It was silly to think of where it came from, but what did it matter? The Brady Bunch used to be one of her favorite TV shows. Miranda never cared much for it, but Gordo would sit with her for hours, through reruns they'd seen numerous times. 

She loved the musical numbers that were in several episodes, and her mother informed her that they had made several albums of music from the show, but that was many years ago. After repeated requests from Lizzie, to get her some of the music, Jo did a little research and found that all the albums had been reissued on CD. She bought the whole set for Lizzie, and she was ever grateful. 

She listened to them non-stop, but skipped over the "bonus" tracks at the end of each, they were from an album done by only two of the "Brady kids", "Marcia" and "Peter". One day, she let the CD's play all the way, and was surprised at a track tacked on to the second CD. It was at the beginning of fifth grade, and some of the lyrics fit, and some didn't. She had put the CD away, and not listened to any of them anymore. When Gordo asked her if she wanted to watch the Brady Bunch on reruns, she made an excuse, or tried to find something better. 

She didn't need the light now. She reached into her closet, and found the CD, exactly where it had been for almost 4 years. She took a deep breath, then pulled out her portable CD player. No MP3's here. She grabbed her headphones from her desk, and plugged them in. She skipped ahead, and track #13 started to play as she lay back, and started to think... 

_ I went into town, this afternoon,   
To show the people my new tune,   
And waiting for the elevator,   
Who should I see, but the boy with the blue-gray eyes, who once belonged to me _

Well, I just stood there frozen in the hall,   
I knew my heart was backed against the wall. 

I wonder how I sounded, when I said I'm doin' fine,   
He has no business knowin' 'bout this lonely road of mine 

'Cause now he has someone of his own,   
And here I am in music land, just singin' alone 

I guess it's just because he was the first,   
But getting left behind hurts all the worst   
Every day, the music smiles, and dances 'round my head,   
Yet, every night I wish that he had stayed with me instead. 

Yes, I guess you've got to give it time,   
And life and love will come around, to rhyme,   
And when it's right, it happens, just as easy as can be,   
But it seems I sit and watch it come to everyone but me 

'Cause now he has someone of his own,   
And here I am in music land, just singin' alone 

The lyrics meant much more now than four years ago. Gordo was the first. Crush, that is. And though she never considered him to "belong" to her, maybe that was how she would have felt, or should have felt, during Gordo's relationship with Brooke. All Parker got was one dance, but it made Lizzie feel almost empty inside. Miranda got to dance with Ethan, and she had to watch. She told herself then she was down because she was the only one who didn't have someone to dance with, but looking back now, she knew it was because somebody else was dancing with Gordo, and not her. 

She turned off the CD player, set it on her desk, then laid back down, trying to sleep. After fifteen, twenty minutes, she was successful, but the strangest thing of all, that night, every one of her dreams seemed to have a soundtrack. 

Lizzie woke up humming a song she couldn't place. She grabbed her watch, and looked at the time. "Oh no! I'm going to be late for school! Today, on the last day, of all days! Ahhh!" 

She got dressed in three minutes flat, and rushed downstairs. "Hey, sleepyhead!" Her mother greeted her as she entered the kitchen. 

"Mom! I'm going to be late! Why didn't you wake me up?" 

"Relax, honey. I thought you could use a few more minutes. I'll give you a ride. You've got time. Go ahead, go back upstairs, and get dressed right." 

Lizzie looked down at herself. Her shirt was tucked in on one side only, two buttons were buttoned wrong, her skirt was wrinkled, and her hair was in a messy ponytail. "Uh, okay." She turned to leave, then turned back. "Mom? Thanks." She hugged her mother, and a tear fell on her shoulder. 

She broke away, and went upstairs, still humming the song she couldn't remember the name of. Twenty minutes later, Lizzie accepted a Pop Tart, and a juice box from her mother, as they got in the car to go to school. She had changed her clothes, fixed her hair, and felt refreshed. 

Her mother turned on the radio, and adjusted it to find a good, peppy song. She left it on a station where a commercial was just ending, and soon, a happy tune filled the air. 

_ I used to think maybe you loved me now baby I'm sure   
And I just can't wait till the day when you knock on my door   
Now everytime I go for the mailbox, gotta hold myself down   
'Cause I just can't wait till you write me you're coming around _

I'm walking on sunshine, woooah   
I'm walking on sunshine, woooah   
I'm walking on sunshine, woooah   
and don't it feel good!! 

Most times Lizzie would be ecstatic to listen to the radio in the morning. She sure didn't get to in the school bus. Usually, she would just bounce along with the music. But now, she found herself paying attention to the lyrics. Was she walking on sunshine? Not just yet, but maybe this afternoon. 

For now, she had Gordo here. She didn't have to wait for him to write, and visit. But what would happen after graduation, if they went to seperate schools, and Gordo went away to become a famous director? Could she handle it? She chose not to think about it anymore. After all, like she had told her mother just last night, she was only fourteen. She had plenty of time to worry about that kind of stuff later.

She was relieved when they reached the school. "Mom? I'll be home early, remember only a half day today." 

"Sure, honey, just give me a call if you decide to do something later. Here." 

Her mother handed her several coins. Lizzie thanked her, then walked up to the school, looking for Gordo. Several students were inside already, but she wasn't late. She walked in, saw Gordo, and just had opened her mouth to speak, when the bell rang. They entered the classroom together, and, this time, sat side by side. 

The day before, Gustav had been a "plant" to keep Lizzie and Gordo apart. Though Kate, Lizzie, and Larry had decided to keep Gustav's name secret when they had been accused of starting the food fight, after lunch yesterday, both Kate and Larry had approached him, told him what they had figured out several months ago. They said they were not going to turn him in, they just needed a favor. He didn't quite understand, but he was to sit next to Lizzie, to keep Gordo away, that was all. Kate and Larry knew there would be tension between the two after "the kiss", and thought it best to keep them apart, so that neither could be embarrassed. Too bad they hadn't asked Gustav to do the same today as well, the level of tension between Lizzie and Gordo yesterday was nothing compared to what it was now. 

Mr. Dig addressed the class. "I know, you probably are wondering why I'm here, and not your regular teacher. They gave him the day off, so that he can chaperone tonight. Today is basically just a day for you to get your report cards, and clean out your lockers and desks. For anyone that forgot, today being the last day, school ends at 12:30. Graduation starts promptly at seven. Those of you who were in my last period study hall yesterday, will remember an assignment I gave you. Write what you are going to do for the summer, and what you wish you were going to do. At least three sentences of each. This was not an assignment I just made up, a teacher gave me the same assignment before vacation, when I was your age, but I had to do two pages on each subject. And I'd like to read for you now, what I wrote." 

The class groaned in unison. They were glad they didn't have to do any work, but none of them wanted to hear Mr. Dig's paper. He droned on, and on, and Lizzie was unable to give him her complete attention. A note landed on her desk, and again, she carefully opened it, keeping an eye on her teacher. 

_ Lizzie, did you listen to some of the CD? Nod for yes, shake for no. _

Even though he was sitting right next to her, she nodded without looking at him. She continued to read. 

_ If you are still willing to talk to me about it, would you please meet me at the park across from my house, at one o'clock? Nod for yes, shake for no. Gordo _

Again she nodded, then glanced over at Gordo, who she found was already watching her. They both blushed and looked in opposite directions. She folded up the note, and attempted to get her mind back on what Mr. Dig was saying. He gave her a stern look, as if he had caught her. Then he smiled, and continued to read. It was alright! He wasn't upset! 

The class finished, and everyone spent the rest of the morning cleaning, organizing, packing. Soon, it was time to leave, and everyone picked up their report cards, and even though they would all see each other in just a few hours, most shook hands, and said tearful goodbyes. 

Larry kissed her hand, and bid her a fond farewell, winking at her in the process. Kate insulted her, then finding no one else nearby, gave her a quick hug, then jumped back, as if Lizzie was on fire. She quickly retreated. Ethan found her, and surprised her most of all by what he said. 

"Lizzie, I'm sorry things between us could never work out. But don't worry, Gordo's a great guy, he truly cares for you, and you don't have to change a thing for him." He gave her a hug, then walked away. He had realized she had tried to change her image falsely to acquire his affection, but he was okay with it. 

She walked out of the school, and looked over her report card. Three A's, Three B's, and an A- in Gym. She wondered how many of those B's would have been C's or A's been B's if not for Gordo's help. She felt so good today, she avoided the school bus, and walked to the park. School let out about the time she'd normally have lunch, and she should be hungry, but her stomach was full of butterflies instead. 

She slowed her pace as she approached Gordo's street. He'd be home by now, but they weren't due to meet for another ten minutes. She stopped for a drink of water, then just like yesterday, sat on a swing, head down, letting her thoughts wander. 

She looked up when she saw a shadow on the ground in front of her. 

"Is this swing taken?" 

She shook her head no, and Gordo sat next to her. He took a deep breath, but neither spoke. 

Where to begin, where to begin? 

** A/N Way longer than the last chapter, this time though, it wasn't due so much to the amount of songs used, but by two things, 1) my little "filibuster" at the beginning, and 2) things are getting very detailed. **

To everyone reading this story, whether you like it, or not, whether you review, or not, thanks again. 

Review if you like, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net I respond to everyone. 

Next chapter up Sunday night, or Monday morning. 

Thanks,   
JP 

List of songs used in this chapter: 

Monica - For You I Will   
Jon Secada - Do You Believe In Us   
Mariah Carey - Can't Let Go   
Flamingos - I Only Have Eyes For You   
Sam Cooke - Cupid   
Doris Troy - Just One Look   
Cornelius Brothers & Sister Rose - Too Late To Turn Back Now   
John Michael Montgomery/All 4 One - I Swear   
Randy Newman - Short People   
Jackson 5/Mariah Carey - I'll Be There   
Maureen McCormick - Just A' Singin' Alone   
Katrina & The Waves - Walkin' On Sunshine 

March 28, 2003 


	17. If You Really Love Me, Won't YOU Tell Me...

** A/N This is MY fictional account of what I wish would happen after Bye, Bye, Hillridge Junior High. **

Just wanted to add that at the top, in case anyone hasn't figured that out by now. Some people write stories, and say the movie never happened, Miranda didn't go to Mexico, etc. etc., well in this story, "stuff happens" BEFORE the class trip. 

I thank each and every one that's reading this fic, I keep thanking the reviewers, so I'll take this time to also thank those who aren't reviewing as well... THANKS! 

It took me two hours to write the last chapter, and FOUR hours to type it up. It more than tripled in size after I "punched it up". And I only used lyrics from three songs! 

One reviewer said "Keep on writing, never stop." Thanks, but this story DOES end. Have no fear, I have a sequel planned. 

I'm glad you guys like all the songs, but I can't use all the ones I come up with, I don't want anyone to think I can't write this stuff without them, and gotta save some songs for story #2. 

I wrote way too many notes at the beginning of the last chapter, so... 

Disclaimer - I do not work for/with Disney, Ren-Mar studios, do not own any of the characters of Lizzie McGuire. 

All songs/lyrics used are property of the respective artists, labels, writers, agents, etc. and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 16. 

Chapter 16 

If You Really Love Me, Won't YOU Tell Me? 

  


----------------------------------------- 

They both sat there, barely swinging, looking straight ahead. Lizzie turned and looked at Gordo, blushed, and turned away. Gordo turned and looked at Lizzie, blushed and turned away. This wasn't getting them anywhere. 

She forced herself to focus on him for more than two seconds. "He looks so cute," she thought. She finally admitted it to herself, the boy who had been her best friend all her life was cute. Cute, sweet, caring, and a whole lot of other things she couldn't even put into words. 

Gordo knew she was watching him, and after a few seconds, he couldn't stand it anymore. He looked at her, and their eyes met. 

"She has such beautiful eyes," he thought to himself. But he couldn't figure out what color they were. Blue? Green? Brown? 

Hazel. What a strange sounding word, but they were hazel, a mix of blue, green, and brown that was perfect. He smiled at her, and she smiled back. A lovely smile, to go with lovely eyes. 

Was she waiting for him to speak first? He couldn't. He was captivated by her beauty. He loved to see her smile, but he wondered what she was thinking. She was here, so she couldn't be mad at him. What was she thinking? A song popped in his head before he could stop it... 

_ It's written all over your face   
You don't have to say a word   
Just smile and smile and smile and smile for me   
It's better than any word I ever heard _

He shook it from his mind. He had no idea how many songs she'd listened to, but he knew she'd had enough. He had to speak now, in his OWN words. But how? 

She actually liked the fact that she seemed to make him nervous. She thought she'd never have that effect on any guy. His eyes were a sparkly bluish-gray, and she could almost see herself reflected in them. She couldn't help looking him in the eyes, since he was looking back. 

When he smiled, his eyes sparkled even more, and her mind started to go blank. She truly believed that what he felt for her was more than a crush, but she wanted him to say it aloud. No more notes, no more songs. She wanted to hear his voice speak the words from his heart. 

He reached for the duffel bag he had brought, and pulled out a box of tissues. He handed them to her without a word. He hoped she'd say something first, anything, he couldn't speak until the silence had been broken. He pulled two water bottles out of the bag, opened both, and handed one to Lizzie. The fountain was on the other side of the park, so had come prepared. 

She hadn't noticed the duffel before. She accepted the tissues and the water, and wondered what else was in there. Would he ever speak? She had been the one who kissed him, so maybe she should speak first. He had acted last by giving her the CD, and the note, so, she guessed maybe it was her turn. 

"Gordo, it's me, Lizzie. Like you said in the yearbook, we've always shared everything with each other, so you can tell me whatever it is, even if you think you can't. Just follow your heart." 

He looked at her puzzled. Was that just an offhand remark? She nodded at him, and he knew she'd figured out the whole "Confused Guy" thing... But what was in his heart? Music. He took a deep breath, and softly started to sing. 

_ You are so beautiful to me   
Can't you see _

You're everything I hoped for   
You're everything I need   
You are so beautiful to me   
You are so beautiful to me 

She kept smiling at him. She was flattered, but she wanted HIS words. 

He knew that said part of what he wanted, but why couldn't HE say it? A crazy idea came to mind, a scene from one of Lizzie's favorite flicks. He took another deep breath, and out came another song. 

_ You are my sunshine my only sunshine   
You make me happy when skies are gray   
You'll never know dear how much I love you   
Please don't take my sunshine away _

Her breath caught in her throat. Had he said he loved her? Yes he did, but she remembered where she'd heard that song before, and laughed. "Ok, Elijah! But what do YOU say?" 

He didn't know what HE had to say. He couldn't put it into words. It was one of those days where he couldn't open his mouth, without a song jumpin' right out, so even though he spoke in his normal voice, out came... 

_ I think I love you   
So what am I so afraid of?   
I'm afraid that I'm not sure of   
A love there is no cure for _

He stopped, and took a drink of water. Like the juice the day before, it worked in reverse, as his mouth was now as dry as it could be. 

She heard him say "love" twice there, but it wasn't him saying it, she knew it was another song. Three strikes and you're out was the rule, but she was willing to give him one more chance. "David Zephyr Gordon, I want to hear what YOU have to say, or I'm leaving!" She waited a few seconds, then stood up, and glared at him. 

Lizzie NEVER called him David, and he loved it. He just wished he had a normal middle name to go along with his first. Why didn't he ever use his first name? There was nothing wrong with it. Now, if his name was Zephyr David Gordon, then it would make sense to be called by another name. She hadn't taken a step away from the swings, but he didn't want to test her. Could it be as easy as just saying what was in his heart, on his mind? He took several deep breaths. He was beginning to feel like Mike Fetters. 

** A/N A few of you got that, but most of you went, "Huh?" **

In the episode Lizzie's Eleven, Gordo refers to the Arizona Diamondbacks as "Overrated, a bunch of banjo hitters, and journeymen," meaning essentially, they aren't very good. At the time the episode was filmed, they were celebrating a World Series victory from the year before. 

Either 1) Gordo hates them, and really thinks what he said or 2) Likes them, and won't admit it. (Since he likes Lizzie, and won't admit it, I'm going with #2. 

Mike Fetters, who played for the Dodgers for a few years, and now is with the Minnesota Twins, joined Arizona during the 2002 season. 

Mr. Fetters, a relief pitcher, is known for taking exaggerated deep breaths before each pitch. He says it psyches him up, and as a result he doesn't hyperventilate. He does this with EVERY pitch. 'Nuff explanation, sorry for the interruption, back to the story now. 

"Lizzie, I." 

"Lizzie, I." 

She softened her expression towards him, and like that night on the porch after the murder mystery, prompted him just a little. "Yes, Gordo?" 

"Lizzie, I love you!" 

There he'd said it aloud, for the first time, other than to himself. 

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she started to speak, but Gordo continued. "First, I loved you as a friend, but it's become more than that. I meant every word I wrote in your yearbook, and the only reason it took so long to write it out, is that I don't believe the words to express how I feel have been invented yet." He reached out, and pushed a stray hair out of her eyes, and wiped a tear away in the process. 

"G- David," she felt it proper to use his first name now, "David, I." Great, now she was stuck. She tried to think of how to explain it to him. 

"Remember back in 7th grade, we got paired together in a 'marriage'?" 

He nodded, it had been one of the few school projects he had enjoyed, until she tried to dump him for Ethan. 

"I'm sorry, but at first, I was just thinking about getting a good grade, but then I thought, "Best friend equals best marriage." 

He stopped swinging. Had she really thought that? She continued. "And then I got upset that I didn't get Ethan, and I ignored you, and I know that hurt your feelings. I'm sorry." 

He accepted the apology with a nod, and remained silent. "Do you remember when I freaked a couple of months ago when I said I should have a career lined up already?" 

Again, he nodded. He had a feeling where this was going, but he didn't think he wanted to hear it. "I thought of different paths my life could take, and then I saw myself as a stay-at-home mom and..." 

He was right. He didn't want to hear, but couldn't tell her to stop. 

"... I envisioned my 'gorgeous' husband" coming home from work, and I was right in the middle of describing it, when you..." 

Gordo couldn't take it anymore. "AHHHHHHHHH!" Here he was, revealing himself to her, and she had to bring up Ethan... 

"...did that... Why, didn't you let me finish? I was NOT seeing Ethan in my dream, it was YOU!" 

He couldn't believe his ears. "Me? You think I'm gorgeous?" He pulled a few tissues out of the box he had given Lizzie, and wiped at HIS eyes this time. 

"Well, yes, I mean, no, I mean..." What did she mean? She racked her brain for another way to say it... "Remember the movie the Lion King?" 

He nodded, he had NO idea where she was going with this... "Zazu tells Simba and Nala one day they will be married, and..." She trailed off... 

He remembered the scene... "And he says he can't marry her because she's his friend, and she says it would be too weird, right?" 

She nodded. "I think that's like you and me. I thought it would be strange. But I have thought of us together before, just not seriously. And I told myself I wanted Ethan, but deep down inside, I guess I knew I'd never get him. It's kind of like when you see someone famous, and you like them, but you know the chances are terrible for you to hook up, because chances are you aren't ever going to meet in the first place. What do you think about that?" 

He didn't know what to think. He'd come here expecting to shock Lizzie, and here she was surprising him. "How many of the songs on the CD did you actually listen to?" 

She thought for a minute... "Um, I don't know, a dozen or so?" Again, he was surprised. He had put about 150 songs on there, and she didn't even listen to 10% of them, but she was still here, talking to him? He didn't know if he should ask which songs they were, so he remained quiet.

"They were beautiful songs, but why are so many of them 'oldies'? I mean, there are songs there that were made before my parents were born!" 

"Because I think most older songs were better in many ways. Sure, there are still wonderful compositions being made, but most can't compare to the music of the 1950's, sixties, and seventies. Now, I'm against censorship, but a lot are talking about butts, or just getting into bed, and those that aren't, I don't know if I want to talk about them... None of those three types of songs are romantic!" 

She'd never thought of it that way before. He decided to give her an example of the latter type song. "Here's a great one..." 

Your one vice   
Is you're too nice   
Come around now can't you see 

I want you   
All tattooed   
I want you bad 

He stopped to take a breath, and found Lizzie laughing at him. If he wanted her to be bad, then she wanted him to be bad as well. She countered his song with yet another song. 

_ Bad, bad, bad, bad boy, you make me feel so good _

Gordo picked up the refrain. 

_ You know you make me feel so good, you know you make me feel so good _

She barely was able to continue with the next line, she was laughing so hard. 

_ Bad, bad, bad, bad boy, wouldn't change you if I could   
_

It was Gordo's turn... 

_ Wouldn't change you if I could, Wouldn't... _

He stopped. Wait, she WOULDN'T change him? Was that right, or was it just part of the song? "Lizzie, you wouldn't change me?" He sighed. "I would." 

"Gordo, you always say I'm perfect, and I never knew what you really meant, but now I'm thinking the same about you." 

"But I'm short." 

"Who cares? There are a million zillion kinds of people in the world. I like you for you!" 

He couldn't believe it. The girl of his dreams liked him the way he was. "I bet you think I'm crazy, don't you Lizzie?" He took a drink of the water, cleared his throat, and out came... 

_ You may be right,   
I may be crazy,   
But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for _

She laughed, but not as heartily as he'd hoped."Yes Gordo, you are a little crazy. But I wouldn't have it any other way. Now can we stop with the songs and try to get serious again?" 

He didn't know if he could, but he'd try. "Ok, since I'm here to tell you all my secrets, here's something you didn't know. I saw you when you and Ronny kissed." 

"What? How?" That was a very private moment, and now she found out they had an audience? 

"I didn't plan on it, I was bringing a CD to you, and you weren't home, so I decided to go to Miranda's, to see if you were there, and I saw you with him, so I kinda hid out, and watched to see what would happen. I just... I don't know." 

Now she understood why he acted like he did the next day. She tried to finish his sentence for him. "...felt like ripping out your intestines with a fork?" She made a face, ewwwww, that sounded awful. 

"Well, no, I found that song later... There's an episode of the Simpsons, when Bart falls for this tomboy, and she asks to meet him at his treehouse, because she has this big secret. When he gets there, she tells him she's just got a new boyfriend, and he has a vision of her reaching into his chest, and ripping out his heart. THAT is how I felt." 

"Oh, come on, you had a girlfriend before I had a boyfriend, so what about how I felt when I saw you kiss Brooke?" 

"What did you feel?" He'd always wanted to ask, but it was one of the many things he couldn't. 

"I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach. Not exactly because I wanted to be in her place, but because I thought it was strange for you to be somebody's boyfriend. Or that's what I told myself." 

"Is that why when I came to your house, and I told you I broke it off, you almost kissed me on the cheek then?" 

She blushed. It had been an accident. Both her and Miranda were teasing him about kissing Brooke, and making kissy faces at him, and leaned in, and if he hadn't put his arm up, she'd have kissed him on the right cheek... "I didn't think you remembered that!" 

"Remembered it? For a week I told myself how stupid it was to have put my hand up at that moment. Even a kiss on the arm was more than I expected, but I missed a kiss on the cheek? That's not something I should have passed up. I'm sorry I ruined the memory of your first real kiss, Lizzie, I shouldn't have told you..." 

"No Gordo, it's okay. Things are a lot clearer to me now. But I haven't been totally honest with you with you either... Yes, when Ronny kissed me it was my first 'boyfriend/girlfriend' kiss, but if you count an official kiss as "on the lips", it wasn't the first." 

Ronny not the first? Who then? "Remember when we went to see Aaron Carter make a video? I left my tape recorder in his trailer, and it was all decorated for Christmas, even though it wasn't, and there was mistletoe above the door, and he kissed me. Yes, I liked it, but it was just a kiss, no romantic feelings intended." 

Should he believe her? He didn't think, she would lie about that. But he needed to know the whole truth, and expose some truth of his own. 

Without him even asking, she knew what he was thinking. "I swear it's the truth. Miranda's cousin kissed me on the cheek twice when we were on that game show, and Frankie only kissed me on the cheek as well, also twice. Other than the two times I kissed you, the accidental one, and yesterday, that's it." 

He nodded, and sensed it was time to reveal a little. "I've been kissed five times. By your own definition, Brooke was the only one I considered a "romantic kiss." The two you mentioned when you kissed me weren't the ONLY times you kissed me, but I guess you don't remember." 

She had kissed Gordo and forgot? No way. 

"I don't blame you for forgetting, I did too, until my Mom reminded me yesterday. It was at this park, and we were six years old. We were on these same swings, and this big kid, probably two or three years older, came up and pushed you off." 

She could vaguely remember what Gordo was explaining. It was a memory that she thought she had long forgotten, but it wasn't really forgotten, just stored somewhere in the recesses of her mind. 

He saw her trying to remember, and stopped until she looked as if she could. He continued. "I jumped off my swing, and belted him good. I think I hit him three or four times, and your mother had to pry me off of him." 

Gordo had fought for her? She was impressed, even though it happened eight years prior. 

"I, I just got so mad, you fell in the dirt, and you even though you didn't cry, it messed up your new outfit, and he had no right to do that!" He was getting worked up just thinking about it. He worked to calm himself before he continued. "I went over and helped you up, and you bent down, and kissed me on the forehead, because then, you were taller than me." 

"Gordo, who cares which one of us is taller? Don't let that Randy Newman influence your thoughts!" 

Wait, he was supposed to delete that song. He forgot? He started to feel a little sick. 

"No, I didn't listen to it, because it said you were supposed to delete it, but I asked my Mom what it was about, and what she said, it just wasn't good. I don't care if you are two feet tall, or ten feet tall, as long as you are Gordo." 

He smiled at her. She truly did like him as is. He breathed a sigh of relief, but his relief was short-lived. 

"Gordo, that makes three times I kissed you, and one kiss from Brooke. You said you were kissed five times. I'm guessing you're ruling out when you were a baby, and got kissed by relatives and babysitters and stuff, like I did, so how did you get five? Who else kissed you?" 

The sick feeling he had just moments ago, again rushed over him. Should he tell her? They were both baring their souls, no use keeping secrets from each other any longer. "Promise not to get mad?" 

"I promise." Suddenly, she knew. "Wait, you don't mean..." 

** A/N ?????????? Guess whoooooo **

I told you this story would have plenty of 'flashbacks' in it, but it's still fiction. 

I switched around some things from the way I originally planned this chapter, hope it worked the way I meant it to. 

Since I find tons of mistakes when I post too quickly, I'm a little late posting this chapter, but the next SHOULD be up before Thursday. 

I almost wish I hadn't set the "post every three days" rule for myself, I don't think the story is suffering in its message, but before you know it, the story will be all online. 

Most of you would forgive me if I spaced out the last few installments more than three days apart, but others would say I should stick to my original plan. 

As always, thanks for reading, review if you like, or email me at either JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

All email will be replied to, and anyone who leaves a review with an email attached, whether on a profile, or written in on an anonymous post, will be contacted, unless you ask me not to. 

Thanks,   
JP 

List of songs used in this chapter: 

Rude Boys - Written All Over Your Face   
Joe Cocker - You Are So Beautiful   
Jimmie Davis - You Are My Sunshine   
Partridge Family - I Think I Love You   
Offspring - Want You Bad   
Mase - Feel So Good   
Billy Joel - You May Be Right 

March 31, 2003 


	18. If I Fell In Love With You, Would You Pr...

** A/N **

FICTION FICTION FICTION 

This chapter, as with the four previous, and any beyond, are what I MADE UP about what happens after Bye Bye Hillridge Junior High. Disregard the fact you know the movie prevents ANY of this from happening. 

The last chapter I wrote, "What I wish would happen", and that's not entirely true. I don't wish problems on the characters, just makes for good reading... Some of this refers to past episodes, MOST is my imagination. 

I'm way late posting this, but I wanted to get it right, and it's still confusing. I think I'll start posting weekly, instead of every three days. I know parts of the last chapter seemed a bit silly, but the two previous were very serious, and most of what's coming is serious as well. If Lizzie and Gordo seem "out of character" to you, a lot has changed the past two days. But I'll let them explain it soon. 

When I wrote the last chapter, I thought you'd all know who I was referring to. Then afterwards, I realized there were four or five possibilities, and two that most people would probably think of. I wrote two different versions of this chapter, then made a third with parts of each. 

All the rest of this story was written in one day, in a marathon-long writing session. But, it's not the same, I've tweaked parts of the story all along, so I'll mess with this a little as well. 

I read too much into things sometimes, and I may be over my head with this chapter. Don't expect a warm fuzziness to this. 

Disclaimer- Don't work for Disney/Ren-Mar, don't own anything related to Lizzie McGuire. 

On to Chapter 17. 

Chapter 17 

If I Fell In Love With You, Would You Promise To Be True? 

  


--------------------------------------------------------- 

She couldn't finish the sentence, it was simply too much to say aloud. She had been standing ever since she threatened to walk off, had paced a bit while trying to explain herself, but had not sat back down. She had better do it now. 

She held onto the side of the swing set for support, as she felt weak. She sat on the edge of the swing, adjusted herself, so she would not slip off, and tried to calm herself. She reached for the water bottle Gordo had given her, and attempted to take a small sip. She immediately started to cough, and set the bottle down, almost spilling it. Gordo lunged for the bottle, and made sure it was upright, then attempted to help her, but she pushed him away. He stood there, waiting. He picked up the water bottle in one hand, and the box of tissues in the other, and held them out to her. She waved away the water, but pulled a few tissues from the box. When she was able to stop coughing, she wiped her eyes, blew her nose, and took several deep breaths before addressing Gordo. 

The name caught in her throat, she choked it out. "Kate." She couldn't believe it, it wasn't possible, but at sometime it had happened. 

He couldn't sit back down now. Lizzie had the wrong idea. He began to pace as Lizzie had done a few minutes before. "No, no, it wasn't Kate, although things might have been different if it had been, because..." He trailed off, then at stopped his pacing, and stood firm. He was watching her intently, and she seemed shocked she'd guessed wrong. 

"It wasn't Kate? Then who would it be, that I'd get upset if I found out about it?," she thought, as she brought to mind all the possible suspects. Her face fell, as it hit her. 

"It, it was Miranda, right?" 

He nodded, and she was glad now that she hadn't had lunch, for she'd surely have lost it at that moment. It was clear to her now, at some time in the past, he had liked Miranda, and she had either not liked him in return, or it didn't last. He had stayed friends with both her and Lizzie, hoping to get back with Miranda at some point, but accepting Lizzie as second best, and now that Miranda hadn't been around for the past few weeks, he had stepped up his attempts to get Lizzie, so that when she returned, she'd be jealous, and they could be together. She began to cry once more. 

Gordo knew it would hit her hard, but he didn't expect quite this strong a reaction. He had no way of knowing what she was thinking, but he had to let her know it wasn't whatever she thought. "It wasn't a romantic kiss, Lizzie, and I didn't kiss her, she kissed me!"

She didn't quite believe him, but he wouldn't lie to her. It was hard to get him to reveal himself, but he never lied, at least to Lizzie. Wait, she could recall one time. When he said he was going to spend time with his father, and she and Miranda had seen him with Brooke. Was this the truth? She looked at him quizzically, like she wanted to believe him, but wasn't quite certain he was saying everything. But why would Miranda be so supportive of their new relationship when she talked to Lizzie the day before? She hadn't told her what happened with the CD and all... Maybe she thought she'd have Gordo out of her hair now, that he had Lizzie, he'd stop trying to get her... It was like a bad dream or something. What should she think? She was getting a headache... 

She looked over at Gordo, she'd never seen him so agitated, but she never remembered being this mad either... "I wouldn't lie to you about this, Lizzie! I've kept it a secret, but I'd never lie about a thing like this! Why don't you believe me?" An image of Brooke flashed before his eyes. He'd lied to Lizzie when he'd met Brooke, more than once in fact. "Just give me a chance to explain!" 

"Explain what? That you picked me after you couldn't have Miranda? That's why you want me to be bad, and that's why you want me to be wild, because I'm a goody goody, and you want me to be reckless like Miranda!" 

"Lizzie, please don't say that, you have no idea what she's been through!" 

"Oh yeah, I really DON'T care! And I don't want to know! I'm, I'm outta here!" She grabbed her water bottle, and threw the contents in Gordo's direction. He moved just in time, and when he saw she was getting up, he rushed over and kept her from doing so. 

"Argh! Gordo! Let me rrgghhh up, you no good lousy grrr HELP SOMEONE ahhhh!" 

She hadn't realized how strong he was. 

"Please calm down. I'm not going to hurt you, I just want to talk to you, please, give me three minutes, please?" 

She stopped struggling long enough to look at him. He was breathing hard from having to restrain her, but she saw in his eyes that he didn't like having to do so. The fact that he'd said please three times weighed on her mind. She'd give him three minutes, but that's all. "Alright, three minutes, on one condition, that you LET GO OF ME!" 

He backed off, and stood a few feet away. 

He hoped he could make her understand and believe in just three minutes. He came right to the point. "I think of Miranda like a sister, the sister I never had, and I didn't kiss her, she kissed me! I didn't ask her to!" 

"Two minutes and a half," said Lizzie. He'd have to do better than this if he wanted her to believe him. 

He tried a different plan. "Okay, I didn't know it until last year, but you had a crush on me in fourth grade. During that year, Miranda and I were at lunch one day, when you were out sick, and we started to walk back to class. She started to say stuff about how much you talked about me, and thought about me, and I didn't get it. Of course, you would talk about me, we were best friends." 

She yawned. "Two minutes," she chimed. 

"Okay, then she said you liked me. Again, I said so what, friends liked each other, then she said, no, you LIKED me, and she couldn't figure out why, and she said she didn't know what you saw in me." 

"Ninety seconds," said Lizzie. 

"She said falling for me would be like falling for her brother, if she had one. Then she said it must be because I was a good kisser. And before I knew it she kissed me. I didn't kiss her back, I was too scared to. I was just stiff." He waited for Lizzie, then said it himself. "One minute." 

"She begged me not to tell you. And no, nothing has ever happened like that between the two of us again. After that, I started to look at you a little differently, but I never thought she was correct when she said you liked me, until she blurted it out last year, and you confirmed it." 

She thought back to when Miranda had told her secret. Gordo had sure SEEMED surprised. But maybe it was like when Kate had told her about what Gordo felt, she had wrote it off as nothing serious, until Gordo would say it himself. But he'd mentioned something about wishing he had kissed Kate instead, what was up with that? "I know I'm going to hate asking this Gordo, but you said if you'd kissed Kate instead, things would be different. Care to explain?" 

"The three minutes are now up. You just used the last thirty seconds yourself. You'd have to give me more time..." 

The time. What was she was supposed to remember about the time? She looked at her watch. They had been at the park a little more than an hour. "I forgot to call my Mom!" She got up, worried, but there was no phone nearby, her mother would be frantic. 

"Lizzie, it's okay, I called your house before I left mine. Just be home by five to get ready for tonight, is all your parents are asking." 

Relieved, she sat back on the swing. "Alright, no more time limits, spill it Gordo." 

"When it happened, no one was around, at least we didn't think so. I heard a noise, and after Miranda ran off, I went to look. I found a girl's hair ribbon on the ground, the same type of ribbon Kate had been wearing that day. After lunch, she had her hair up with a rubber band instead. The four of us were all friends then, but she was cold to me that day. I think that's what started her breaking off her friendship with the three of us." 

Lizzie remembered how Kate had gone to cheerleading camp, and upon her return, had blown off her three friends with excuse after excuse, finally saying she now had "better things to do" than to be with them. She sensed their friendship wasn't as strong before she left, but it wasn't just that she had made new friends, it was that she wanted nothing to do with the old ones anymore. 

"I really don't know, because I never asked, but I think she may have had a crush on me too. And she saw how you were behaving towards me, and then Miranda kisses me, and she thinks it's hopeless, I'll pick one of you before I pick her. I think her becoming a cheerleader was so she'd have an excuse not to be around us anymore. Since she became popular, she could snub us and say we weren't good enough for her. Maybe she thought she'd impress me or something, but the only way I'll ever know is if she tells me, because I don't have any idea how to bring it up with her." 

Lizzie didn't know what to think. He kept right on talking, so she'd have to sort out her thoughts later. 

"She hardly ever insults me, or bothers me unless you or Miranda is around. I think if I'd just let her crush on me, that maybe she would have gotten over it, and the four of us would still be friends. While you aren't friends with Kate, you do try to help her with her problems. You don't provoke her like Miranda does sometimes. You don't back down, but she always starts it." 

Wow, this was all news to her. 

** A/N It's news to me too, and I wrote it! **

"I've forever been teased about being 'best' friends with two girls. At the time of your crush on me, I considered both of you as my best friend, but I had known you much longer, and I felt there was something more, but what it was, I wasn't sure. I don't think a ten year old can fully comprehend love as in a romantic situation. Love, like as in the love of a child for his parents, parents toward the child, sibling for sibling, etc., but not boyfriend/girlfriend." He needed a breather. "Do you have any thing to say here Lizzie, before I continue, or should I go on?" 

She didn't have any idea what to say. "Go on." 

"I think I was just starting to understand about LOVE love when Brooke showed an interest in me. I didn't know about your crush yet, and when you reacted the way you did, it got me thinking. I never acted on what I was feeling, because I thought if you didn't feel the same in return, it could ruin our friendship. It might be awkward to be 'just friends' with someone who you know likes you as more. 

Lizzie spoke. "I don't know, when you were going with Brooke, I just freaked. Miranda thought the whole thing was weird, but I kinda went crazy. I think she thought I was jealous." 

"She thought I was jealous too when I went off that you had Ronny for a boyfriend. I-I was." 

"I was too," she admitted. "But, if she knew what we both felt, why didn't she push us then?" 

"She wasn't sure. We both denied it, remember. She didn't know which of us to push, because if we pushed back she could lose us as friends." 

"If she had tried then we could have avoided a lot of heartaches, do you realize that? Look at all that's happened the past two days. Everything has snowballed at me... Why tell me EVERYTHING now?" 

"Because I had to before high school. You said you were 'going to get rejected by a whole new group of guys'. Well, I bet quite a few would accept your attention. You've got to stop believing that you are a nobody. People like you, you are a good person." 

Yeah, yeah, he'd said all that before. Except for the first part. "You really think someone else would like me?" 

He nodded. "It scares me to pieces that I'd lose you because I was too stupid to open my mouth." 

"Lose me? I thought you said we'd always be friends no matter what?" 

"I said that, I meant that. But if I never tried to tell you, and you ended up with someone else, then I don't know what that would do to me. At least if things don't work out, you know how I feel. How do you feel?" 

"I-I, I don't know. I tried to tell you a few minutes ago, but it didn't come out right. I do like you a lot. I know I really do like you, but I don't think I LOVE you, at least right now. I'm sorry." 

To Gordo, those words hit him like a block of concrete. She didn't love him in return? "Don't get me wrong, I didn't say I couldn't feel that way at a later time. It's just I've been in love before, and I've found that love is more than just holding hands. If I say I love you, doesn't that open a whole new door for the future? We have our whole lives ahead of us, aren't we kind of rushing things?" 

That was precisely the reason he couldn't open up to her the day before. "I respect your feelings, and if you can't say you love me now, it's alright. At times, it does frighten me to think of how strong my feelings are for you, but I never want to lose you as a friend. If I was to ever do anything to hurt you, it would kill me inside." 

He truly did love her, and not Miranda. She knew that now. "Just promise me that if your feelings for me change, that I'll be the first to know. If I can start to think of you as more than a friend, but then you want to go back to the old way, you won't string me along." 

"I just told you I would never do anything to hurt you. I'm not planning on asking you to be my girlfriend now, then going out with other girls later. I want to be with you. My best friend." 

She winced. "But isn't it strange for best friends to be in this situation? Do we have to stop the way things have been, and change everything? 

"When I broke up with Brooke, I told you I didn't like having to wait at her locker, and pay for her lunch, and all that, but I already do that for you, usually without you ever asking. We can still do everything we have always done, just with a few extra perks..." He rushed on before she could comment. 

"Ask your mother, and she'll probably say your father is her best friend, and vice versa. When you see old married couples on TV, and they ask what their secret is, they usually say that their spouse is their best friend." 

"Spouse? That's just what I mean! Rushing things! I don't know if I'm strong enough to handle all these changes." 

"I told you, nothing has to change for now. I'm sorry if that last comment I made was a little too much. I have to say I'd like very much to be with you for my whole life. But this is not the time to talk about it. We've said so much, maybe we should go slowly from this point on." 

"That's what I want. Give me a little space, and let me figure out where we should go from here." She laughed. "Even Matt told me you were good for me. He called you a catch, can you believe that?" 

"I knew he was a smart kid. He's got brains, if he'd just use them, and quit goofing off so much." 

"Matt also said you'd make an excellent brother-in-law." She blushed. 

"Like I said, the kid's got smarts. But don't worry, I'm sure he'd love being 'Uncle Matt' but I can promise it won't happen anytime soon." 

She sighed. "But no matter what happens between us, one thing WILL change. Our friendship with Miranda." 

"Why? I told you there are no romantic feelings between us. We can have a 'mutual' friend, and still be together. Would it be any different if Miranda was a guy instead?" 

She guessed not. 

"We should thank Miranda. You said she didn't push us, well she pushed one of us. Me." 

What? "When you got that busboy job for awhile, you weren't able to hang out with us as much, and we started to talk about all sorts of stuff, and I didn't tell her then what I felt, but I wanted to. I thought maybe I could see how things were from a girl's point of view or something. I found myself telling her things that I couldn't tell you. She could ask me about why boys are they way they are, and I could figure out one of life's greatest mysteries. Girls!" He said the last part, as he looked up to the sky, while throwing up his hands. This earned him a punch in the arm from Lizzie. 

"Have you talked to Miranda lately?" 

"Yes. A lot. I set up a private chat area, and we've talked many hours online." He reached for his duffel bag, and extracted two large manila envelopes, and handed them to Lizzie. 

She hesitantly accepted them, and wondered what else the bag held. He seemed to sense her question, and he turned the bag upside down, showing it was now empty. "What are these?" 

"I printed out every time we talked, so you can see that I was helping her, and we weren't having a secret rendevous or anything." 

She opened one envelope. Inside were about 150 pages of emails and chat sessions with various dates and times, dating back for months. The earliest it looked was about mid-January. "It started at Christmas, just so you know." 

"Christmas? You talked to her at Christmas? Do you know what was the matter then? Can you tell me?" 

"Yes, I know. And I was told to keep it quiet all this time, and I begged Miranda to tell you, but she wouldn't. She gave me permission to tell you now, but if you want to start taking things slowly, I'm not sure how much I should tell." 

"Is it that bad?" 

"Well, it's not the worst that could happen, and things are much better now, but..." He stopped. Lizzie had been told about so much, could she handle it? 

"Gor-DO! I'm sorry I said I didn't care what she'd been through, I do. Tell me! Please?" 

He really didn't want to get her upset again. He'd better sit back down for this. "I don't know everything, but I'll explain the best I can... It all goes back to the first day of eighth grade..." 

** A/N You can all flame me now. Wouldn't be surprised if I got some neg comments here, or lost some readers. I warned you all along this story wouldn't be all fluff. **

Hope I have enough stuff to use for a sequel. 

Reviews appreciated, not required, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

All email will be replied to. If you include an email on a review, I will contact you, unless you ask me not to. 

Next chapter up don't know when, sorry... I'm kinda bummed. This wasn't exactly a happy chapter to write/post. 

Thanks,   
JP 

April 4, 2003 


	19. She's Solved Her Problems, And She's See...

** A/N FICTION FICTION FICTION **

This chapter, along with the previous five, and any beyond, are what I MADE UP about what happens after Bye, Bye, Hillridge Junior High. Disregard the fact that you know the movie prevents ANY of this from happening! 

Wow! Can't believe that! No flames! Thought for sure I'd get some for four or five different things... I can't figure you guys out, unless everyone who read the chapter, but didn't review, hated it. 

I hope not, but if so, 

WHATEVER! 

Yes, I AM my own worst critic. When I said I read too much between the lines, I was referring both to the fact that I was anticipating some negative feedback, and that some of you might wonder where I came up with parts of what I wrote. 

Okay, here's one chapter a lot of you have been waiting for, "What's Up With Miranda". I have NOTHING against LaLaine or the character of Miranda. I just thought maybe there was a bigger reason for her being gone for a few episodes than "She's sick", "She's out of town", etc. 

I did NOT wait to post this just to keep you interested, or to make anyone mad. If I wanted to, I could have made an entire story from Miranda's point of view. I waited because I wanted to tell all of the story here, at once, and to show that things were better now than they had been.

It took me a long time to find a lyric to use for the chapter title here... 

Since everyone else seems to be doing it, I'll follow the crowd. I'm working on a list of my favorite Lizzie stories. Don't want to leave any out, so I'm not posting it just yet. 

To Reviewers: 

Thanks, thanks, thanks. In a story, I feel that you have to describe a lot of the 'action', because you have to be able to 'see' the characters, and typos and grammatical errors really bug me. Use of slang is ok, but I want things to be just so. Not that it's 100% perfect, by any means. 

As for all the songs, I really did do quite a bit of research, and I'm still adding to my list, close to two hundred songs I'd like to use, but this story's almost over... If you can't find any one of these online, I have all of these on MP3's, just email and ask me. 

For everyone that says "Please email me when you update!", or "When are you going to update?" I'm registered with 'Support Services', if you want, on the button where you review, there is an option for "Author Alert", which will let you know automatically the SECOND I update. 

Answers to two questions no one has asked yet about Chapter 17 (16)... 

1) the Simpsons episode Gordo refers to is "New Kid On The Block", which I also used to write the chapter title for chapter 7 (6) "Hertz Donut" 

2) The movie from which Gordo re-enacts a scene, is "Forever Young" starring Mel Gibson, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Elijah Wood. 

Just in case anyone wanted to know... 

I'm sure that this story will fall off the 'recently updated' list rather quickly, as most stories here are updated on Fridays and/or Saturdays, but since there is no 'new' Lizzie episode tonight, here goes... 

Disclaimer - Don't work for/with Disney/Ren-Mar, don't own the characters of Lizzie McGuire. 

All songs/lyrics used are property of the respective arists, labels, agents, writers, etc. and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 18 

Chapter 18 

She's Solved Her Problems, And She's Seen The Light 

  


--------------------------------------------------- 

"Wait. First, you said it STARTED at Christmas, and now you say it STARTED the first day of eighth grade. Which is it?" 

He sighed. This wouldn't be easy to explain. "Well, I have to go back a little, for it to make sense. Just hear me out, and if you don't follow, let me know, alright?" 

"Alright." 

"Before I start again, what do you know?" 

"You mean, what did she tell me? Not much. She just said she knew what was going on around here, I asked her how she knew, and she said you'd told her, and beyond that, she said I'd find out." 

"Well, I've been keeping her up to date with stuff. I really wish she had told you SOMETHING, but I guess that means I'm free to tell the story the way I want. Remember all those times you got upset that I wasn't online? I was, and I was helping Miranda. I found out most of the story after Miranda left. It's all related." 

"You mean, Miranda didn't go on vacation to Mexico?" 

"I wouldn't call it a vacation. If they wanted to take a vacation, you think they coulda waited a week or so. But she is in Mexico." He stopped. "Now you're making me get ahead of myself. Major stuff happened at the end of last year, but it had been building up since September. Remember all the stuff that happened the first week of school?" 

"Yeah, you went to high school, and I got a clone." She shuddered involuntarily, remembering the experience. She intentionally left out the part about her first real kiss, since they'd already discussed it. 

"Well, I guess she wanted one too, and that kinda made her a little depressed that no one was following her around like Andie was following you..." He remembered how much Andie had imitated Lizzie, she almost became her double, but her 'becoming' Lizzie was just a mirage. 

She noticed the way he trailed off, and called him on it. "Gordo, did you like Andie?" 

He suddenly became flustered. "Well, I don't know, uh, yes, and no, well, not really, uh..." 

"You liked her when she tried to be me, didn't you?" He didn't know what to say. He was looking at the ground. 

"I-I thought it was great when she started to be more like you, I could have the best of two worlds, a Lizzie to go out with, and a Lizzie to be friends with. That sounds dumb, but that's what I was thinking." 

"But I got so mad you were paying so much attention to her, that I asked why you would ask her out, and not me, and you didn't want to ask me. Why not?" 

He had to ponder that a minute. It was like when someone said, "I knew that you knew that I knew that you knew that I knew", or whatever THEY said. Who were THEY anyways? "Y-You wanted me to ask you out? What would you have said?" 

"I didn't want you to, I was just upset that you'd pick her over me. Wait, would you have asked me?" 

"I don't think I would have had the guts then... I DID ask you once later, remember?" 

She couldn't recall. She looked at him, puzzled. He filled her in. "Remember when Parker turned me down? I asked you to go with me to the dance, and you made some lame excuse about not dating blue-eyed boys. Then what do you do? Go out with Frankie Muniz, who has big stupid blue eyes!" He was getting himself worked up. He paused and took a small drink of his water. Since Lizzie had wasted hers, he offered some to her, but she shook her head. 

"I had no idea you were serious! Why didn't you tell me?" 

He laughed. "And how was I to make you understand? We've always gone to school events together. And if you COULDN'T go, I WOULDN'T go." 

She thought for a second. He was right. "Gordo, I'm sorry. In the future, I'll try to better determine when you are joking and when you are serious." She suddenly remembered they were supposed to be discussing Miranda. 

"This isn't what we are supposed to be talking about here", said Gordo, as if he could read her thoughts... 

"Sorry. Are you stalling?" 

"Well, no, well, maybe... How 'bout if I just skip ahead a little?" 

She nodded. "Okay, so here we were, it was the first week of school, and yadda, yadda, yadda. You go nuts when I leave, I come back even though I didn't have to, etc. etc. Anyways, this and that, and then came the music video you guys did..." 

She had missed him terribly when he'd left. She understood now why she did. As for the video, that was lots of fun. She loved it... "Gordo, why don't you use your camera much anymore?" She'd wanted to ask for sometime, but didn't want to pry... 

He sighed. "Okay, real quick, I'll tell you, then, on to Miranda's story? Please?" 

She waited, as yet another secret became known. "I felt I was misusing my camera. I mean, I love filming stuff, but when we did that video, I had a terrible time keeping it focused on other things besides you." He blushed, and dropped his head yet again. "It was getting too much for me... You know how many hours of tape I've got stored from all the projects I've done? She shook her head. And how much footage is of you?" Oops, maybe he shouldn't have said all that. 

She was flattered and embarrassed at the same time. "Sometime, show a little to me. As long as I'm not too klutzy, or you didn't focus just on, you know, 'certain' parts of me, it's ok, really." 

Whoa. He wouldn't have had the nerve to just focus on part of Lizzie, besides, he liked to see all of her. "No, no, nothing like that... Now can I continue with my story?" 

"Sorry, go ahead." 

"Anyways, while we were making that video, Miranda went on that weird crash diet thing, and we both freaked, remember? She said she was okay, but I guess it was just temporary." 

??? What did he mean, temporary? "Well, I guess everything continued to weigh on her, and she just couldn't stand it... You got a boyfriend before she did, and the only one after her was Tudgeman. She tried to get Ryan what's-his-name interested in her last year, but that didn't work. You keep trying to help Kate, and she can't. All three of us get in a big fight, and she gets paired in a class project with who? Tudgeman." 

"You keep saying 'Tudgeman' like he's something bad, he's just different." 

"I know that, you know that, but that's not the point. I think she sees Larry like Ethan sees you, just a friend. Let me finish, please." 

He waited, and she was silent, so he continued... "Anyways, it was a couple of days before Christmas. Miranda was kinda depressed, thought she needed more friends. Not different friends, but just needed to expand her 'circle' a little. She was absent the few days before vacation. You were busy with your float for the parade, and I wanted to help, but it was kinda awkward for me being near you without Miranda around." 

"Is that why you didn't come around much during Christmas break? You felt weird hanging around me without Miranda?" 

"Yes! Now, please! Let me tell you!" She apologized. It wasn't like her to be interrupting like this. Of course, it wasn't every day that she heard stories like she was hearing today. She made a motion of running her thumb and finger across her lips like a zipper. 

"Okay, anyways, we were both busy or preoccupied, or whatever you want to call it. For some reason, neither of us called her or went to see her to find out if she was really sick, how she was doing, if she needed anything or whatever. You know that dance club downtown?" 

She nodded. If she opened her mouth, she'd probably babble. A nod was safe. There was more than one club in the area, it was better to say she understood... 

He knew her better than that. "The one that opened last fall." Suddenly, she knew where he was referring to. She was a little embarassed at him catching her in a half-lie. It was like he could see inside her brain, right to her thoughts. 

This was taking longer than he thought. He'd have to try to sum things up as much as possible, or they'd be here all day. "Anyways, they had only been open like a month or something, and school was letting out for the holidays, and they had this promotion thing where instead of letting just those over eighteen inside, they dropped the minimum to sixteen. Even though she was barely fourteen, somehow Miranda made it in, I don't know exactly how. Nobody seemed to question that she wasn't supposed to be there, so she just let loose and had a good 'ol time..." He stopped himself this time, without any interruption from Lizzie, and swallowed hard. This was one of the parts he dreaded revealing. "I guess they didn't have enough people watching to make sure that the party was 'under control' and someone spiked the punch they were serving, and Miranda had a cup, not knowing anything was wrong." 

"Wait, you don't mean?" He said it had started at the beginning of the school year, and the year was now over. She calculated the time from beginning to end of the school year, and the time from Christmas to now, and she suddenly imagined the worst.. 

She could be thinking of a few different things, but which? Just tell her what happened, and she'll know she guessed wrong. "No, all that happened was she started to feel a little sleepy, and she left to go home." 

Lizzie exhaled sharply. She didn't realize she had been holding her breath. 

"I guess it whatever it was it really took effect, because she said the next thing she remembered was waking up at Mr. Dig's house." 

"Huh? What does Mr. D--" He held up his hand to cut her off. She had to let him explain. 

"Seems being a substitute teacher doesn't pay all the bills. So he took a second job, some kind of security thing. He was on his way home, when he passed by a bus stop, and there was Miranda, asleep on the bench. Of course, he knew something was wrong. When he tried to wake her, she mumbled at him, but didn't want to wake up. He didn't know her address, so he took her to his home. From there, he looked up her number, and called her parents. When she got home, and told them what happened, they thought it best to keep her inside the house awhile, so they could watch her. Remember that blue car you didn't recognize that was outside her house when you went to visit on Christmas Day?" 

Wait, how could he know that? Duh, he'd visited Miranda like thirty minutes later. Again she nodded. She still had a hundred things she wanted to say, but they could wait. 

"That was her aunt's car. Her aunt is a psychiatrist, just like my parents. Basically, she came to ask Miranda why she did what she did. And when we showed up to visit, she partially blamed us for what happened, like if we had been better friends, one of us might have been with Miranda, and she wouldn't have gone to the club. Her mother convinced her it wasn't our fault, and that's how we got in to see her." 

"Then why didn't she tell me what was going on? She said she was fine!" 

"But she wasn't. You accepted her answer, and I didn't. We used to be able to sense things about each other. I sensed there was a problem, you just started telling her your dream." 

The dream. Had Miranda told him what she'd dreamed? She knew now what the Gordo in her dreams was trying to say.... "No, she didn't tell me what the dream was about, just that it was silly. See, what I mean? You didn't say a word, yet I knew what you were thinking..." 

It was eerie. Was she that transparent? Appearantly, her friends could see through her, but not the other way around. She'd been oblivious to both Gordo's feelings, and Miranda's problem... "So, she stayed at home during Christmas vacation. She seemed fine when she returned. What happened then?" 

"Well, she guessed then what I felt for you, and she encouraged me to act on it. I tried, but after the bomb she dropped on me, I couldn't. If you remember I acted a little odd on Christmas Day..." 

Boy, did he ever... She had to ask him one more question before he continued. "Gordo, what was with all the stuff you gave me for Christmas?" He sighed, she'd interrupted him again. "Just tell me real quick, then you can get back to the story?" She looked at him, with those sad eyes, and he just melted. Oh well, he'd kept Miranda's story a secret for months now, he could wait a couple more minutes. 

"I wanted to give you everything you wanted. I always have. I don't know what it is with you and sweaters." He thought back a little.. "Remember 'class picture day' in seventh grade?" She did, and it brought a smile to her face. Yet another time when he had come through for her."Anyways, you wanted that sweater so much. You look good in sweaters. I saved some money on it, it was kinda on sale, so I bought the other stuff for you too." He suddenly realized one of his remarks could be taken in an inappropriate manner, and he apologized if it had sounded dirty to her. 

"Don't worry Gordo. I didn't think anyone was paying attention to how I looked, you know, in THAT way." She started to laugh. He was very uncomfortable now, and she thought it was hilarious. She wasn't even TRYING to flirt with him. What would he do if she did? 

"Well, uh, getting back to the story of Miranda...." He tried to compose himself. He couldn't look directly at Lizzie when he talked, she threw off his train of thought. "...I'll try to tell you just a few highlights before I get to the recent stuff." Once again, he made like Mike Fetters. 

"When school started up in January, she promised to let me tell you how I felt, by myself, but she was trying to give me a little help here, and there, and none of it was working. She got a date to the Spring Fling, but after she asked him to go to your house instead, he didn't want to go out with her again. A couple of months later, she finally accepted a 'date' from Larry, due mainly to the fact you said he was fun, and harmless, and she actually had a good time. Then, she started to think how he had gone after you at first, and it made her feel second best, like he couldn't have the gold medal, so he had to settle for the silver." 

She had no idea. She thought Larry and Miranda might be a good match. So Miranda had thought she was 'second best'? Interesting how she had, in a way, jumped to the same conclusion, thinking she was 'second best' to Miranda, when Gordo had told her of his 'first' kiss. Did that mean that Tudgeman felt the same about Miranda that Gordo felt for her? 

"She was kinda upset at me, said I wasn't trying hard enough. When Frankie visited Hillridge, she encouraged you to go out with him. She was a little upset I had encouraged you to try for Ethan. I knew you weren't going to change Ethan's mind, I had no idea what to think about Frankie. Then I realized you weren't going with him just because he was famous, and he turned out to be a pretty nice guy." 

"He was a little insecure, but it's hard to be in the spotlight, then go back to being a regular person. I wonder how he's doing?" 

"Fine. His show's going strong. I actually gave him copies of a couple of the tapes I made, and he's put a good word in for me with some TV execs, so if I want, I might get some sort of scholarship in a few years." 

How odd. A former flame of hers keeping in contact with a 'spark' trying to be a flame. No, that wasn't quite right. Gordo wanted to be more than just a 'flame', he was seriously head over heels for her. But why couldn't she return the feeling back to him just as strong? He'd stopped talking once again. Either he didn't want to tell her anymore, or he sensed that she was deep in thought. She waved her hand in front of his face, to snap him out of it. 

"Uh, anyways... Miranda had me set up that chat area a few months before, because once, we were IM'ing each other, and you jumped online, and I almost sent you a message meant for her. So with alternate handles, you couldn't stumble onto the conversation. We really didn't use it a whole lot until Miranda left town." Whew. He was almost to the interesting part. 

"It seems that one day, on the way home from school, she ran into some guy that used to go to school at Hillridge Jr. High, but he graduated last year. They hit it off, and he said his brother had his own apartment, since his brother was in college. They went to his brother's place, and..." 

She gasped. "No!" 

He wished she'd stop jumping the gun. "Cut that out!" She was visibly shaken. "He wanted to do more than she did, and she just left." 

Relief poured over her. Why did she keep envisioning these horrible things happening to Miranda? She mumbled a quick "I'm sorry", to Gordo for her outburst. 

"She went home, and she was confused. Here some guy seems to like her, and she rejects his 'advances'. Even though she didn't want to do what he did, she was upset that she had lost another potential suitor. She printed up some kind of phony ID thing on her computer, dressed up to look as 'old' as she could, and went out. She found herself at a different club than before, and amazingly, the ID worked. She wanted to show that she could take chances and win over any guy she wanted. This club served alcohol, and she found a couple of abandoned drinks, and downed them, thinking maybe they'd give her some courage, or something like it." 

He paused. He tried to remember things as Miranda had told him they had happened, but he hadn't been there, he was just trying to paint a better picture for Lizzie. "She must have felt real brave or something, after those drinks. She walked up to some guy she thought was cute, and, who was there WITH his girlfriend, and asked him out. Not just to dance, but on a date. In front of his girlfriend! He basically told her to go away, but she wouldn't. The girlfriend kept getting more and more upset, and they started to fight, and all three of them were kicked out of the club. The fight continued a little into the parking lot, but the girl left her alone when Miranda stopped fighting back. She was feeling woozy from the drinks, but she knew what she was doing was wrong. She knew she shouldn't be there, and she should have told you what was going on the whole time. She left the club, planning to go to your house, but she was SO out of it, she couldn't FIND your house." 

He started to cough. He was talking a LOT. He took a small sip of water. It was almost gone. He'd have to ration what remained, or they'd have to leave soon. He started his explanation again. He shouldn't have cut off his story there, Lizzie's eyes were bugged out, while she was trying to think of what happened to Miranda next. "She almost made it, but basically, what happened next was pretty close to what happened once before. She fell asleep on the same bus bench, and was again rescued by Mr. Dig. This time, he knew where she lived, but hadn't heard the story of her problems before. Later, she told him part of it, and that I was helping her. He asked me to stay after school one day, and I told him a lot of what was going on, and if nothing else, he was an ear for me to talk to." He laughed. "Yes, I also told him a little of things that were going on between you and I. I had asked him for advice when the whole 'Parker' incident happened, but I didn't tell him who I was talking about then, and he thought YOU called me short, and stuff. I told him that wasn't so, and he's also been a great help, convincing me that my feelings for you were a good thing, and giving me tips on what I should do." 

"God bless Mr. Dig. I'm going to miss him next year. Even though he's not a regular teacher, he's always been my favorite. I wonder if any teacher in high school will be as 'interesting' and understanding as he was." 

"Don't worry, he'll still be around." He smiled. He knew something she didn't. "Seems it's too expensive for Hillridge Junior High to keep two subs on the payroll. Mrs. Dew is paid at a lower rate, than he is. so they decided to let him go. He applied at the high school, and he hasn't heard back from them yet on his application, but the fact that there are four grades there instead of two, and he can teach most any subject, he might even become a real teacher next year, having the same class every day for a change." 

Mr. Dig a real teacher? At least one thing in high school could be fun. Two, if she and Gordo could pull off their new 'friendship' or whatever they would eventually settle for. 

"What happened to Miranda, right? I'm getting to it... She did leave to go visit her aunt, but because she was sick, not her aunt. She was a little more understanding of Miranda's problems this time, and told her repeatedly that she was just fourteen, it was okay for her to be without a boyfriend at this time, just to be a teenager for now, don't rush to grow up so fast. She was sent to Mexico to be with her extended family, to try to help her. Her grandparents have a HUGE house, and there are lots of relatives always there, more coming in and out all the time. She hasn't been allowed out alone, unless it's with a chaperone. But she is doing her school assigments, much as we have been doing. Even though she won't be at the graduation exercises, she'll still graduate. She'll be a little late in doing so, but if all goes according to plan, she'll be starting high school with us next year, right on schedule." 

"So, she's doing good?" 

"Yes. If everything continues to fall into place, she'll return about a week before school starts. Being with her family has helped quite a bit. Since there are so many people in the house, she usually doesn't get to use the computer except for late nights. She has a one-and-a-half year old cousin that she's been taking care of the past month or so, while the mother is finishing school herself, seeing how she just turned seventeen last month." 

He let her do the math in her head, then went on. "Yes, she was just about Miranda's age when she found out she was pregnant. Like Miranda, she thought she should 'grow up' a little, and she jumped ahead real fast. The guy cut out, left town, and her parents sent her to Mexico, so her neighbors wouldn't gossip about a pregnant fourteen year old being around. Of course, her leaving so abruptly made them talk anyways. She's doing much better now. She's allowed to come back to her home in the United States when she turns eighteen. She met another guy, who geniunely loves her, and knows her complete story. He plans to come back home with her, and they are talking of marriage. Miranda said it showed her that her life the way it is, or was, is alright after all." 

"But, why did she push you so much to tell me how you felt?" 

"Because she felt it wasn't healthy to keep my feelings a secret, like maybe I'd get sick keeping them hidden. Not sick physically, but mentally. We might have continued to pair ourselves up with other people, only to see our efforts fail, and that would be only hurting us even more, and I HATE to see you in pain." He laughed at how Miranda had explained the next part to him. "She said just because 'Mr. Right' hadn't popped up in her life yet, was no reason it couldn't happen in her friend's life. But she's even thinking of giving Tudgeman another chance, to see if he's serious about her or not. Believe me, Miranda is genuinely happy for us, And she will remain our friend no matter what. She'll be the glue that holds us together. If things don't work out, and we fight, we'll probably still talk to her, and she'll figure out a way to get us back together, or die trying. She told me everything that happened, because she knew she could count on me." 

"That's it!" 

"Huh? What?" 

"I've had a song stuck in my head all day. That's the song!" Seeing how he still looked lost, she started to sing softly. 

Count on me through thick and thin   
A friendship that will never end   
When you are weak, I will be strong   
Helping you to carry on   
Call on me, I will be there   
Don't be afraid   
Please believe me when I say   
Count on... 

She stopped. She didn't know the first verse. She was surprised she remembered the complete opening... She couldn't help smiling, from 'ear to ear', was the expression she'd heard often, but not understood completely until now... She looked at Gordo, and he was giving her those 'puppy dog' eyes. He quickly turned away. 

His turning from her broke the spell, and she explained what the song meant to her. "If only I could have told Miranda what that song says, no matter what trouble she gets into, I'll be there for her." She paused. "Just like you said you'll always be there for me, and I will always be there for you as well." 

Oh boy. He wanted her to be there for him, always, and forever. He also loved to hear her sing, and then there was that smile. It couldn't be described as anything other than perfect. It was much more, but it was definitely perfect. He suddenly had those other, much stronger feelings again toward her, but he worked hard to control them. He was also stiff from sitting so long. He got up and stretched. He'd told Lizzie a LOT of what he wanted to say, but not everything. Did he have enough courage to continue to open up to her? 

Lizzie watched as Gordo stood up, and decided she should also get a little more comfortable. She stretched her legs out, and then, threw out her arms, stretching them in a similar manner. When she realized he wasn't making an attempt to sit down again, she stood as well. So many secrets and repressed feelings had been discussed in such a short time. He'd said so much, yet, she knew there had to be more. All of a sudden, he seemed so restless, and she assumed he still had more to say, but was afraid. Afraid? After all he'd told her? That was crazy. "Um, so is there anything else you want to tell me or ask me right now?" They each had the other's complete and total attention, might as well find out if he was holding anything back or not. 

He muttered, "No, nothing else", and started to walk off... The last time he said it was 'nothing' was after the murder mystery party. She had to find out what, if anything, he'd hadn't said yet. She stepped in front of him, and refused to let him walk any further. 

"Hey, come on! It's getting late!" He stepped off to the right, so did she. He stepped to the left, she followed. 

"No! Tell me what else is on your mind!" 

He sighed. Could he tell her? He had such a problem saying things like this out loud. He'd give it his best try. He opened his mouth and... 

** A/N Cliffhangers are fun! **

This is the second longest chapter I've posted, but a few more words, and it would be #1. 

Okay, now you can: 

1) flame me 

OR 

2) (I hope) tell me that it was good, and somewhat believable. 

Sorry if you think I used too many ' ( single quotes) in this part. Next chapter will be up by this time next week. 

It's the other chapter you've been waiting for, (maybe), which will be (maybe), L/G to the max. 

As always, reviews are appreciated, but, are not required. You can also email me at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

All emails will be replied to, and anyone leaving an email in a review will be contacted unless you instruct me not to. 

Thanks,   
JP 

Song in this chapter: 

Whitney Houston & CeCe Winans - Count On Me 

April 11, 2003 


	20. What Lies In The Future Is A Mystery To ...

** A/N FICTION FICTION FICTION **

This chapter, along with the previous six, and any beyond, are what I MADE UP about what happens after Bye, Bye, Hillridge Junior High. Disregard the fact that you know the movie prevents ANY of this from happening! 

I don't know why I thought you'd get really mad two chapters ago, and only somewhat mad after the last, but everyone that posted thought it was alright. I hope only a small number of the 'silent' readers thought otherwise. 

Sesen, hope your head didn't explode. I just couldn't do this in three days. When I was posting in that manner, I didn't have much time for rewrites, or proofreading. Good things take time. Patience is a virtue. Etc, etc, blah blah blah. :-) 

For everyone else, thanks for your patience as well. Tried to post this Friday evening, it's now Saturday morning, technically. I redid this chapter so many times I could recite it in my sleep. 

Once again, regarding this entire story, and the last chapter especially, I have NOTHING against LaLaine or the character of Miranda. 

Disclaimer - I do not work for Disney or Ren-Mar Studios, or whatever involved with Lizzie McGuire, so I don't own the characters, okay? All lyrics used are property of the respective artists, labels, writers, agents, etc, and ASCAP/BMI. 

On to Chapter 19 

Chapter 19 

What Lies In The Future Is A Mystery To Us All 

  


---------------------------------------------- 

...burped. Loudly. He turned red, and tried to apologize, but his voice was absent. He felt like Lanny, he could make no sound. He was puzzled by Lizzie's reaction. First shock, then amusement, then concern. Here he was trying to be serious, and he failed. 

He couldn't look at her. He turned, and again, started to walk away, head down. It took her longer than before, but like she just did a few moments ago, she stopped him. This time though, he wasn't upset. He didn't know what to feel. What could she possibly think of him now? 

"Gordo. Look at me!" He was able to only for a second, then he quickly looked down at the ground again.... "Come on, let's sit down and we'll talk this out." She led him to one of the many benches in the park. They could have been sitting at a bench this whole time, but chose the swings because of their sentimental value... 

They sat on opposite ends, not too close, but not too far apart. A very thin person could fit between the two, but these seats weren't meant for three. "Tell me! It's not like anything you are going to say is going to shock me any more than anything else that you've already said! We've lost too many moments where we couldn't talk about things, and I'm not going to give this one up that easily!" 

Boy, she was really worked up now. He wished he could have better anticipated her reaction to everything that had happened. If he could go back and do it over, he would do things in a much different order, and not draw things out so much. He was sorry for the way he had behaved a few minutes ago. He should have known that she was going to interrupt him during his story, it was a little much to take in all at once. All she'd really asked for was some clarifications here and there. A couple of times she was just thinking aloud, he couldn't blame her for that. Did he actually think he could tell her all of these 'earth-shattering' tidbits of information, and she'd just sit back and listen? Of course not, if he was the one listening, he'd probably react in much the same manner. No, strike that, he'd be a wreck by now. She was taking this much better than he thought possible. But, what how would she feel about the rest of what he wanted to tell her? Only one way to find out. He took his ninety-seventh deep breath of the afternoon, give or take, opened his mouth, and this time, words actually came forth, a little hesitantly at first, but that was alright. 

"L-Liz Liz" Whew. Breathe. In, out. In, out. What's so hard about that? "L-Lizzie, uh," 

Oh great. Now he was reduced to saying just her name. For a guy who had a 4.0 average, he was earning an 'F' here. Slowly, calmly, he tried again. "Elizabeth Brooke McGuire," Wow, what a beautiful name for such a beautiful girl. He couldn't ever remember saying it all before out loud. He didn't even know her middle name for a long time, it was like a little secret she had kept. Brooke, that was her second name. Brooke! He had dated a Brooke! Coincidence, or did it mean something deeper? He shook it off. 

"Elizabeth Brooke McGuire, I have just two questions for you." Well, that much he could say, and that much was true, but could he actually ask them? 

Lizzie sat there waiting. At first she was a little impatient, but she then realized that whatever he had to say must really be something big. Questions? What was so hard about asking a question? When he spoke her name, it sounded so elegant. She never liked her full name before, but it sounded different now. She'd read a list somewhere about the most pleasant and least pleasant sounding words in the English language. 'Jazz' was one of the worst sounding. 'Lizzie' had two z's, did that mean it sounded worse than 'Elizabeth' which had only one z? Why was she concerning herself with something so trivial? Was she afraid to answer a direct question? 

"Okay, first question. Would you go with me to the Digital Bean after the graduation? I mean, it'll kind of be like a 'test' date, and we go there all the time anyways, so it wouldn't seem too strange. If anyone sees us, they wouldn't think anything of it. I'd like to be able to take you some place better, but with the class trip coming, I have to save my money. If I don't make a total goober out of myself tonight, and you'll let me, I'll take you wherever you want, as soon as I can. I've wanted to ask you out for a long time now, but I couldn't. I almost said something when you broke up with Ronny, but I thought maybe you'd think I was trying to get you 'on the rebound' or something. After the murder mystery party, I didn't know what to do. I thought if I asked you out, you'd say no, and if I tried to kiss you, I'd get slapped. I never wanted to push you to do something you didn't want to do." Oh! He felt sick. He felt light-headed. He was going to pass out. He tried to continue, but Lizzie reached out, and put her hand on his shoulder for just a second, then removed it, as if to silence him. He tried not to hyperventilate. Slowly he calmed down, and waited to see what she would do. Was she going to answer his question? 

"Gordo, Gordo. Shhh! It's ok, really it is. I'll go with you to the Digital Bean later tonight. To be honest, I forgot about the trip, with everything else that's been going on. I understand you have to save your money, but wherever we go is okay with me. Don't think we have to go there because being somewhere else will make people talk. It's perfectly alright with me if we are seen together. As for going out again, let's just get through the first date and see how it goes." 

Whew. She continued to talk, faster than he thought was humanly possible. "And I'm sorry I kept interrupting you, but you did just tell me a bunch of stuff that was pretty serious, and I wanted to make sure you weren't making it up, and were telling me everything. I said I couldn't say that I love you now, because that would have to come later. I'm still saying that, but 'later' just may be sooner than I thought. I never realized how much you've done. For me, for Miranda, for everyone! You said it to me, I'll say it to you. You're just great!" She stopped. 

"You are very special to me, and I wouldn't be the person I am today without you and your friendship." Weird, she kept using what he said to her, to talk to him. "I think maybe things were meant to be the way they are, and we have no real control over them. Maybe our lives are pre-determined, and our choices aren't as random as they seem. If what you suspect is true, it's not your fault that Kate had a crush on you at the same time I did. It's also not your fault that she saw you kiss Miranda and came to the wrong conclusion. It's not your fault that I came to a similar conclusion. It's not your fault that Miranda had a few problems, but it is her fortune that you were there to help. It's not your fault that she wouldn't tell me what was going on. It's..." 

He was listening, but couldn't stop thinking about one fact... She had agreed to a date with him! Even though she said it was alright if they went someplace other than their normal 'hangout', he'd probably take her there anyways. It was comfortable for both of them, and even though she said it wouldn't be awkward for her, who knew if that would be the case when they got wherever they were going? What if it wasn't awkward for her, but for him instead? Deep in thought, he'd missed the last few words she'd said. He tried to 'tune' back in. 

"... not your fault how tall you are. It's not your fault that I couldn't see how you felt about me. It's not your fault that..." She stopped. Why wasn't he cutting her off? After all, she'd stopped him from rambling. She looked over at Gordo. He had a smile on his face, as he just sat and watched her go on and on. "Aren't you going to stop me from making a fool of myself?" 

"Lizzie, from my viewpoint, nothing you do could make you look like a fool. I love you, now and forever. He softly sang a few words. 

_ Whenever I'm weary from the battles that rage in my head   
You make sense of madness when my sanity hangs by a thread   
I lose my way but still you seem to understand   
Now and forever I... _

He didn't dare say the last four words of the verse, she might think he was being too forward. He altered them slightly. 

_ ...will do all I can _

She smiled at him. She knew the real words, but understood the change. He continued to seranade her. 

_ I don't remember what day it was   
I didn't notice what time it was   
All I know is that I fell in love with you   
And if all my dreams come true   
I'll be spending time with you _

He skipped ahead to the chorus. 

Oh, I love you more today than yesterday   
But not as much as tomorrow   
I love you more today than yesterday   
But, darling, not as much as tomorrow 

He was on a roll now. One more, that was it. 

_ No matter what you are   
I will always be with you   
Doesn't matter what you do girl, oh girl with you   
No matter what you do   
I will always be around   
Won't you tell me what you found girl, oh girl won't you _

He had sung to her before, but now he seemed to have more confidence, and was enjoying himself. Still, something was missing. He stopped and just smiled at her. 

"Uh, Gordo? The second question?" 

Second question? What second question? Oh! THAT second question. Slowly, calmly, he asked what he'd wanted to ask for so long. "Lizzie McGuire, three times in my life you have kissed me. Can, no, MAY I kiss you?" 

She was genuinely surprised. Not that he wanted to kiss her, but the fact that he'd asked for her permission. He had just admitted he almost kissed her after the party. No one had asked her before, they just did it. "Yes", she said softly, as she closed her eyes, and waited. 

He smiled, and leaned toward her, to give her a peck on the cheek, like she'd given him. At the last possible second, she opened her eyes slightly, and realized what he was about to do. She turned her head just a bit, and they kissed on the lips. He didn't know quite how to react. At first he was stunned, then he kissed back, but only a few seconds later, the kiss was over. They parted and looked at each other. 

Wow, he felt like he had just been pumped full of sodium pentothal. He was walking on air. Whoo hoo! 

Lizzie once again felt many emotions all at once. Should she be happy? Shouldn't she feel disgusted kissing her best friend? She had kissed him before, but this time it was different. Not just a little peck. She adopted what Christina Ricci's character had done in 'Now and Then', she downplayed it as being 'no big deal', but deep inside she wanted to tell the whole world how wonderful she felt. But was it alright for her to feel this way? 

He realized that Lizzie was keeping part of her feelings from him. Why? He had to tell her once more how much she truly meant to him. He cleared his throat and again, began to sing. 

_ You're my peace of mind   
In this crazy world   
You're everything I've tried to find   
Your love is a pearl   
You're my Mona Lisa, you're my rainbow skies   
And my only prayer is that you realize   
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes _

Well, so much for surpressing what she felt. She'd heard this song many times before, but never dreamed it would be sung to her. She locked eyes with Gordo as he continued. 

_ The world will turn   
And the seasons will change   
And all the lessons we will learn   
Will be beautiful and strange   
We'll have our fill of tears, our share of sighs   
My only prayer is that you realize   
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes _

You will always be - beautiful in my eyes   
And the passing years will show   
That you will always grow ever more beautiful in my eyes. 

She couldn't help it. Tears were running down her face, but she didn't speak. This was the sad part coming up. She let him continue, no way could she, or would she, interrupt him now. 

_ When there are lines upon my face   
From a lifetime of smiles   
When the time comes to embrace   
For one long last while   
We can laugh about, how time really flies   
We won't say goodbye 'cause true love never dies   
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes _

She joined him on the chorus. Softly they sang the last five lines to each other. 

_ You will always be - beautiful in my eyes   
And the passing years will show   
That you will always grow ever more beautiful in my eyes   
The passing years will show   
That you will always grow ever more beautiful in my eyes. _

They were both silent for a short while, then Gordo started to lean into Lizzie, and without realizing it, she started to lean into him. They closed their eyes and kissed, a long, soft, glorious kiss, it was just perfect. They slowly pulled back from one another, and opened their eyes carefully to catch the other's reaction. 

He thought of a scene near the end of one of his favorite films, 'the Princess Bride'. 

_ Since the invention of the kiss, there have been five that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind. _

He didn't tell Lizzie what he thought, but if he had, she might be inclined to agree. He couldn't speak. Once again, he leaned into Lizzie, and they kissed. They were about to kiss a fourth time, when they heard voices not far away. They both turned to look. 

A small blond girl, no more than six years of age, came running by and squealing, as she was chased by a small dark-haired boy roughly the same age. The mothers of the children were not far behind. The young boy helped the girl onto the swing, gave her a push, and climbed on to the swing next to her. The parents settled themselves on a bench across from Lizzie and Gordo.

Gordo and Lizzie sat there, just watching, waiting. They saw two children who seemed very similar to who they themselves had once been. When they realized the mothers and their kids planned on staying for some time, they felt it was time for them to go. It was now just past 4:00, neither of them had eaten a bite since breakfast, and Lizzie had just an hour before she had to be home. They decided to go across to Gordo's house for a quick sandwich or something, then they'd just relax for awhile... 

They got up, and started to walk away. They were halfway up the path, when they heard a scream, and a shriek. They quickly looked back and saw the boy had fallen off his swing. The boy's mother was racing towards him. Just before she reached him, the girl stopped her, and looked the boy over herself. Finding no blood, and loudly declaring that he had no broken bones, she waved his mother away. He dusted himself off, and she started to help him back onto his swing. At first he did not protest, but when he realized the two teenagers were watching him, he began to fidget. Lizzie and Gordo laughed, and again started to walk away. 

They hadn't gone more than three steps, when Lizzie stopped and said basically what Gordo had thought but didn't dare say. 

"Don't fight it kid. Enjoy life now while's it's easy. As you get older, things just get more difficult." 

He smiled at her. "Lizzie, I love you just the way you are. But, I love you too much to let you stay that way." 

That last comment earned him a poke in the ribs. He put his arm around her waist, and she leaned against him, as they crossed to his house. 

Gordo's 'internal' radio started again, and the song he heard made him feel better than he had in a long time. 

_ For once in my life I've got someone who needs me   
Someone I've needed so long   
For once unafraid I can go where life leads me   
And somehow I know I'll be strong _

For once I can touch what my heart used to dream of   
Long before I knew   
Someone warm like you   
Could make my dreams come true   
For once in my life I won't let sorrow hurt me   
Not like it's hurt me before   
For once I've got someone I know won't desert me   
And I'm not alone anymore 

For once I can say: "This is mine you can't take it"   
As long as I've got love I know I can make it   
For once in my life I've got someone who needs me. 

While they both honestly meant what they had said about always being there for each other, no matter what, neither knew whether this new 'partnership' would work, or if they could actually remain friends if it failed. They both knew that times change, people change, and there are always circumstances beyond your control that can alter everything in an instant. But they felt that together, they were strong enough to do the best they could to endure any hardships and trials that might try to tear them apart. They both wanted everything to be as perfect as could be, but they knew it was impossible to think everything in life would be smooth. Neither of them could predict what the future would hold. They did know that together, and with Miranda to help, they'd do their best to survive whatever life gave them. 

** How it happens? ** They don't care... They know today is taking them exactly where they're meant to be. 

_ The End? Or simply a new beginning? Only time will tell... _

** A/N Awwww! Like you didn't see that coming! **

But, you may not have seen THIS coming. When I wrote this, I intended it to be the finale, but I keep changing my mind. 

I don't know, I'll have to ponder it for awhile. Let me know what you think. I may add to this, may start a new story, I may temporarily leave the universe. Who knows? Not even the Shadow knows. 

Whatever I decide, thanks for your support with this story, for reading it, for reviewing it, for all the suggestions, even for the complaints.. 

Reviews much appreciated, never required. You may also email me at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

All email will be replied to, all who include an email in a anonymous review, or have their email on their profile will be contacted, unless you instruct me not to. 

Thanks,   
JP 

List of songs in this chapter: 

Richard Marx - Now And Forever   
Spiral Staircase - More Today Than Yesterday   
Badfinger - No Matter What   
Stevie Wonder - For Once In My Life 

April 19, 2003 


	21. Author's Note Part 44

Author's Note Part 44 

  


----------------------------- 

Thought I better say something here... I'm glad so many of you liked the last chapter. I worked and worked to make it just right, and I still wasn't sure about a couple of things. But that's the way it's been all along, I re-read what I've posted previously, and I think of things I should have or shouldn't have done, but too late now. 

Yes, this really is the forty-fourth note I've posted in this story... I'm very verbose... 

I don't know how many of you 'got' the last few lines of Chapter 19, but now you know how I got the title. It was just 'Lizzie fic' until like two days before I finished writing. 

I did write the last three chapters in one day. Six hours non-stop. It was kinda stupid how I wrote this whole thing, I would take a piece of notebook paper, write on both sides, and when I got near the bottom of the backside, I'd try to sum up and cut it off for the next chapter.. So on paper, each chapter was like 1,000 words, but I 'intensified' them... 

Like I said, not entirely sure what's next... Wasn't even sure I was going to post this 'chapter' here. I may add more to this after I see the movie, or I may start another story, don't quite know yet, but won't decide until I see the film. I have an outline for a possible second Lizzie story, but I still don't know if it should continue from here, or be seperate. I just might pull a "Miss Dew" and take a little sabbatical. Most of you seem to think it wouldn't matter if I continued or not, it's good as is, but more wouldn't be bad, but I don't know...

I've gotten plenty of compliments about the way I write, but I may try my hand at another TV show before I do another Lizzie fic. 

There is not a 'real' chapter here, or at the next part, which is just a list of songs used and my favorite LM stories here at fanfiction.net. I really don't expect to many people to read this, or review, but I never know with you people. 

No one ever asked, but the fanfic I wrote in ninth grade was about "the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air". I still have the notebook I used, but there is no section on this site for that show. 

It's pretty bad anyways, I think I got a 'B' on it, not for the story so much, but I used a bunch of that week's spelling words. 

When I wrote this, I never thought it would get so much of a reaction. I never anticipated all the praise, or all the flames. 

I never thought I'd be on someone favs list. I would have kept posting if I had received five reviews or five hundred, but I love all of my reviewers AND those who have added me to their favorite author, or favorite stories lists.

I hope everyone that was posting negative remarks changed their minds later on, either that, or they gave up, or just decided to stop reviewing... Not that negative criticism is a bad thing, but there is a difference between criticism and rudeness. 

So... Thanks to (in no particular order): 

Sesen ObsidianMoon, TasChiBandGirl, theRealXenocide, kidcomm, Jaime Sumner, BlackMage, adam4me, spikeslittledevil, starcraze, love-fool, keeponwritin, ninjamonkey, ThePopGurlz, JessObessed, Black Knight, Tano, macdeniken, CaptainLavender, KitKat, December Everett, SSJGoten, The Sharminator,ladyravan99, TigerLily, , PezHound, britfan1, ne2wo3hree, Matt, Moo, Mandie, AngelicDemon16, Crono, EmilyFairy, I3ItterSweet, GordoLuvr4Life8988, AH, archforge, Andy, Kat, Lara, NekoRamna13, Roxie-Albright, Lisa, Chelsea, Laura, Britt, Jommoov, becky, Emily, Katie Tann, swim6516, Georgie, Emma, joe, political princess, Beth, Sum41bl1nker, samantha 

Hope I didn't leave anyone out, if I did, I sincerely apologize. 

Thanks to all members of the Yahoogroups I'm in, along with all the posters at TVTome. Thanks to all the other writers here at fanfiction.net. 

Thank you Thank you Thank you.   
JP 

Email at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

April 23, 2003 


	22. How It Happens: The Soundtrack plus My F...

Complete List Of Songs Used In This Story 

  


----------------------------------------- 

Below is a 'complete' list of songs that were used in my story. I have every single one of these on MP3, so if you are looking for one, and can't find it, let me know... 

+ Used For Chapter Title Only   
/ Seperates Artists when two (or more) have recorded the same song. 

** Chapter 4 (3)   
What It Feels Like For A Gordo **

+ Madonna - What It Feels Like For A Girl 

** Chapter 6 (5)   
Exchanging Gifts And Maybe A Little More **

"Weird Al" Yankovic - One More Minute 

** Chapter 10 (9)   
Chat Sessions And Sad Songs **

Backstreet Boys - As Long As You Love Me   
Clarence "Frogman" Henry - I Don't Know Why (But I Do)   
Tony Rich Project - Nobody Knows   
Everly Brothers - Crying In The Rain   
Smokey Robinson & the Miracles - Tears Of A Clown   
Smokey Robinson & the Miracles - Tracks of My Tears 

** Chapter 12 (11)   
Everybody Hurts, And Sometimes, Everybody Cries **

+ REM - Everybody Hurts   
The Deele - Two Occasions   
Main Ingredient/Aaron Neville - Everybody Plays The Fool   
New Edition - If It Isn't Love   
Linda Scott - I've Told Every Little Star   
The People - I Love You   
Carpenters - Goodbye To Love 

** Chapter 13 (12)   
Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Make Me Say That I'm In Love With You **

+ Mel Carter - Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me   
The Heights - How Do You Talk To An Angel   
Abba/Erasure/A*Teens - Take A Chance On Me   
Beatles - You've Got To Hide Your Love Away   
Ricky Nelson - Fools Rush In   
Billy Joel - Tell Her About It 

** Chapter 14 (13)   
One Day They're Just Friends, Then Somebody Bends, Unexpectedly **

+ Celine Dion & Peabo Bryson/Disney - Beauty And The Beast 

** Chapter 15 (14)   
Guess I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song **

+ Jim Croce - I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song   
Reo Speedwagon - Can't Fight This Feeling   
Londonbeat - I've Been Thinking About You   
"Weird Al" Yankovic - One More Minute   
Mr. Big - To Be With You   
'N Sync - It's Gonna Be Me   
Randy Newman - Short People   
Rene y Rene - Lo Mucho Que Te Quiero   
Penguins - Earth Angel   
Cars - You Might Think   
Stevie Wonder - My Cherie Amour   
Savage Garden - I Knew I Loved You Before I Met You 

** Chapter 16 (15)   
How Can I Tell You That This Is Not A Puppy Love? **

+ Paul Anka/Donny Osmond - Puppy Love   
Monica - For You I Will   
Jon Secada - Do You Believe In Us   
Mariah Carey - Can't Let Go   
Flamingos - I Only Have Eyes For You   
Sam Cooke - Cupid   
Doris Troy - Just One Look   
Cornelius Brothers & Sister Rose - Too Late To Turn Back Now   
John Michael Montgomery/All 4 One - I Swear   
Jackson 5/Mariah Carey - I'll Be There   
Maureen McCormick - Just A' Singin' Alone   
Katrina & The Waves - Walkin' On Sunshine 

** Chapter 17 (16)   
If You Really Love Me, Won't YOU Tell Me? **

+Stevie Wonder - If You Really Love Me   
Rude Boys - Written All Over Your Face   
Joe Cocker - You Are So Beautiful   
Jimmie Davis - You Are My Sunshine   
Partridge Family - I Think I Love You   
Offspring - Want You Bad   
Mase - Feel So Good   
Billy Joel - You May Be Right 

** Chapter 18 (17)   
If I Fall In Love With You, Would You Promise To Be True? **

+ Beatles - If I Fell 

** Chapter 19 (18)   
She's Solved Her Problems, And She's Seen The Light **

+ Frankie Valli - Grease   
Whitney Houston & CeCe Winans - Count On Me 

** Chapter 20 (19)   
What Lies In The Future Is A Mystery To Us All **

+ Carpenters - Goodbye To Love   
Richard Marx - Now And Forever   
Spiral Staircase - More Today Than Yesterday   
Badfinger - No Matter What   
Stevie Wonder - For Once In My Life   
Hilary Duff - I Can't Wait (paraphrased at chapter's end) 

** Other Lizzie Fics You Should Read **

--------------------------------- 

Below is a list of my '21' favorite LM stories on fanfiction.net. Three of these are in two parts. Some of these are incomplete, two are 'R' rated. The number next to each is the story id #. (You can alter the URL of my story to get to any of these, change the '1254299' to the numbers below.) Here, these are in no particular order, but they ARE in update order on my 'favorite stories' page on my profile. Some of these are not for everyone, and not being on this list does not mean I think that the other one-thousand (yikes! that's a lot!) or so other Lizzie stories here aren't good, but, in my opinion, these are just the 'cream of the crop'. 

** "No Time to Waste" ** by ** TheRealXenocide ** (936847)   
** "Nightswimming" ** by ** EmilyFairy ** (1252703)   
** "I'm Not Single Anymore" ** by ** Mr. BC ** (1194225)   
** "Ready To Fly" ** (Part 1) & ** "Perks On The Side" ** (Part 2) by ** EmilyFairy ** (1237081 + 1238055)   
** "My Bloody Valentine" ** by ** keeponwritin ** (1233707)   
** "Buildup" ** by ** BlackMage ** (1259445)   
** "Defining Love" ** by ** BaByGuRL ** (611702)   
** "Someday We'll Know"  ** by ** HipHopMarmalade ** (1290484)   
** "Clean Slate" ** by ** Jennifer ** (958086)   
** "Everything" ** by ** SesenObsidianMoon ** (1229024)   
** "The One I Left Behind" ** by ** BlackMage ** (1221368)   
** "Things I'll Never Say" ** by ** Diva ** (1231540)   
** "A Normal Life With Me" ** by ** Sammy the Story Magi ** (1243658)   
** "Unexpected" ** + ** "Still Unexpected" ** by ** KarasumaFirestorm ** (1271623 + 1310927)   
** "Please, Gordo" ** by ** Lisden ** (1262481)   
** "I Left My Heart In Boston" ** by ** MissAngel ** (1158236)   
** "Then And Now And Forever" ** by ** Britfan1 ** (932013)   
** "Dear Santa" ** by ** FictionMac ** (1129211)   
** "I'm With You, A Best Friend, And More ** by ** LittleGypsy25 ** (1221829)   
** "Oh, The Places We've Been" Parts 1 and 2 ** by ** Jennifer ** (1243674 + 1302574)   
** "Obituaries" ** by ** keeponwritin ** (1008486) 

** Thanks,   
JP **

Email me at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

April 23, 2003 


	23. Reality Used To Be A Friend Of Mine

** A/N What? A new chapter? Read on... **

Disclaimer- This is the 23rd 'part' to this story, and I still don't have anything to do with Lizzie McGuire, Disney or Ren-Mar Studios.. 

On to Chapter 20. 

Chapter 20 

Reality Used To Be A Friend Of Mine 

  


----------------------------------- 

  


"He's waking up!" 

"Well, then BACK OFF! You think he wants to see your face right now?" 

"I guess not, I mean he didn't like it when I tried to wake him. The last time, he said to give him three minutes, well, it's been almost ten." 

Gordo heard the voices as if in a dream. Kate and Larry, arguing. What was real and what was a dream? He tried to go back to Lizzie, but the voices wouldn't go away, and they were pulling him farther and farther away from his 'shangri-la'. He slowly opened his eyes, raised his head, and looked around. Gone. It was all gone. He was back at school, and he hadn't told Lizzie a thing. Or had he? He laid back on the grass. Several of his other classmates were nearby, and Ethan was with Kate and Larry. They were closer to him than the rest of the student body. He addressed the trio. "What happened?" 

Ethan spoke up first."Dude! Lizzie kissed you when they took the picture, and then you passed out when you were leaving the lunchtables." 

He tried to remember. He'd realized Lizzie had read what he put in her yearbook, then everything after that was a blank. Had he freaked out that much? He must have, but what a scene it must have caused. Why didn't they wake him up? Again, he asked a question for whoever was willing to answer. "How long have I been out? Why didn't you wake me?" Ok, that was two questions. 

This time Larry chimed in. "About fifteen minutes I guess." He frowned, then corrected himself. "Actually, closer to twenty. You weren't really asleep, kinda like a sleepwalker, and it's dangerous to wake up a sleepwalker. We did try to wake you up a few minutes ago, but you put up a struggle, and asked for three minutes, then more time after that." He looked apologetically at Gordo. I hate to wake you up, but we're all late for class." 

Kate hadn't said a word to Gordo, and he guessed it was now her turn. "You had this big smile on your face, and it sounded like you were singing most of the time, and when you weren't, you were talking about Lizzie." 

Lizzie? Where was Lizzie? Was it possible? Could he have dreamed more than twenty four hours of life in less than thirty minutes? 

Ethan and Larry both spoke at the same time. "Lizziesoverthere" 

Gordo shook his head. It was like they had taken a funnel and poured the alphabet into his ear. He looked at them quizzically, and Kate easily pushed them both away. 

"What they are TRYING to say, is Lizzie is over there." She pointed to the school entrance. "That's what you wanted to know, right?" 

Of course he did, but he hadn't said it. He nodded to Kate, too surprised at her help to speak. He rolled onto his side, and set one elbow on the grass, and rested his head in his hand as he scanned the area. Lizzie was sitting just off to the side of the doors, her back to the wall, knees up to her chest, head in her hands. He guessed she had been occasionally looking in his direction. At least he hoped as much. She looked up for a second, and was about to look down again, when she saw he was watching her. She straightened up a bit. She had been crying, and a few strands of hair were in her face. She pushed them aside, and concentrated on her four schoolmates. No way could she hear what was going on at this distance. He had to talk to her. NOW. He sat up indian-style, took a deep breath, and said a quick prayer. He attempted to stand, but his legs wouldn't cooperate. He was too stiff. 

"Need help?" Larry reached out his hand. He gave Ethan a quick punch in the arm, and when he reacted, motioned to Gordo. 

"Ow, huh? Oh yeah, here Gor-DON, grab on." Ethan took one hand, and Larry the other, and Gordo was standing up. He stretched his legs several times, and popped one knee... He pushed away Ethan and Larry, he could walk on his own... Slowly, he walked over to Lizzie. Everyone else was going back to class... Several passed by her,as she was there, still sitting, waiting... He stopped just short. What could he say? He tried to recall something, anything, from his dream. He could remember bits and pieces, that's all. He had to hold on to what he could. 

Lizzie sat there, just waiting. When Gordo passed out, she didn't know how to react. She had panicked, and ran off. She had been by the school entrance almost the entire time. Close enough to see what was going on, far away enough so she would be out of the chaos. 

He stood over her for just a second, then sat next to her. "Lizzie? Are you alright?" 

"Am I alright? Are you alright? I thought... I thought..." She couldn't finish. She started to cry again... 

He gave her a gentle hug... "Shhh, it's okay. I guess it was just the shock of everything. I mean, not only did you kiss me, you did it in front of everyone..." He held her for a few more seconds then released her... 

"Well, I read what was in my yearbook, and I wanted to say something, but they called for the pictures, and I had to do something, I felt like I'd bust otherwise!" 

He knew she'd read it, but how would he explain it? He opted not to, for now. "Uh, Lizzie? Don't you think we ought to get to class?" They looked around, they were alone. 

She sighed, and smiled, as they got up and started inside. "We're already late, a few more minutes won't hurt." She paused. "D-did you really mean what you wrote?" 

She was looking at him intently, not angrily, but admirably. He nodded slowly, unable to speak. 

She exhaled sharply. "I can honestly say I wouldn't be the person I am either, without your friendship. You are sweet. As for the 'friend and more' part, we'll see. Let's give it some time..." 

He could handle that, as long as she knew what he felt was more than a crush, and maybe, just maybe, she'd return the sentiment later. They were almost to their classrooms. Suddenly, his face lit up. 

"Lizzie, would you like to come over after school and listen to some music?" 

"Sorry, I can't. Have a ton to do to get ready for Friday and the class trip. Don't worry, we have all summer." 

His heart sank just for a second. Oh, well, he tried. They split to go to their respective classes, then turned back, and smiled at each other. Gordo blushed, and she laughed. 

"I have a feeling things are going to get really interesting," thought Lizzie, as she entered her classroom. A lot could happen, but what? And how? 

** How it happens? ** She didn't care, she knew today was taking her where she's meant to be... 

** A/N Have a bunch to say, but I'll wait a bit to see what some of you think. **

Thanks to all who thanked me for thanking them a couple of chapters ago. (No problem) This story needed people to read and review, and that's what it got... 

Review or email me at JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

Thanks,   
JP 

'Reality Used To Be A Friend Of Mine' is a song by PM Dawn. It's also a lyric in the PM Dawn song, 'Set Adrift On Memory Bliss',(yes it's a completely different song than the one by the Backstreet Boys), both tracks are on the album, "Of The Heart, Of The Soul, Of The Cross: The Utopian Experience". 

May 2, 2003 


	24. All I Have To Do Is Dream

** A/N Huh? Think of this as another 'possible' ending... **

Disclaimer - Do not work for Disney or Ren-Mar Studios... 

Chapter 21? 

All I Have To Do Is Dream 

  


------------------------- 

"Gordo?" What? Who? Someone was invading his thoughts... A girl, but not Lizzie... He raised his head and looked up. It was all a dream, a wonderful, lovely, intricate dream. He sighed deeply. Veruca was in front of him. What did she want? 

"Uh, you've got the desk I usually use, and this isn't your class..." 

What? Of course it was his class. He glanced at his watch. No, wait... he must have fallen asleep and no one had told him class was over. Slowly, he got up, gathered his books, apologized to Veruca, and left... 

He paused in the hall for a drink of water, then stopped to think... the halls were just about empty... someone scurried past him, and ran to class, late. He knew he was late, but he had to think a bit... 

It had all seemed so real. All along, he kept thinking it was a dream, and it was... Some parts were so vivid, and others were a blur. Now he had to do the unthinkable. Go through all that for real this time. He couldn't. The Gordo in the dream spilled, and spilled, and spilled, until all the secrets were revealed. He couldn't do that. He had to get to class... NOW...

He sped to his class. Study hall. Who needs study hall the last week of school? Not Gordo. He slowly opened the door, trying to sneak in... 

_ C-rrrrr-eeeeee-aaaa-kkk!_

All eyes turned to him. He knew now why they never oiled the doors. They were a primitive alarm system. He took a seat near the back. He had interrupted Mr. Dig, and now he was continuing. Wait, what was Mr. Dig doing here? 

"Your classes are pretty much done, so all your assignment is for this hour is to write." 

Half the class looked puzzled. Mr. Dig sighed and explained further. "Just write. ANYTHING. Your life story. Names of people you know. Lyrics to your favorite songs. A dream you had. Just write. I won't read it, I just want to see you making an effort." 

A dream huh? Gordo pulled out his notebook, and found a few empty pages. Better remove them, he didn't want Lizzie to read these, yet. His pencil seemed to be on fire, he was jotting down everything he remembered from his dream, the good, and the bad. His lead ran short. Argh! Why didn't he use mechanical pencils? He found a pen, and continued. He had a full six pages, and wasn't half done... Ow! Cramp! He dropped his pen, and flexed his fingers. No one was paying him any attention. He tore a few more pages out of his notebook, and continued. 

He filled out three more pages, then the bell rang. Why couldn't he work like this when it counted? It DID count. Everyone was leaving. He covered his work. "Can I stay a few minutes to finish?" 

Mr. Dig looked at him strangely. "Sure, Mr. Gordon. I have no other classes. You have thirty minutes, if you can't finish by then, you'll have to do it at home." 

He nodded, and looked for Lizzie. She must have already left. He finished his writings just over twenty minutes later, and left for home. He wanted to see Lizzie, but thought maybe it best to wait. 

Wait wait wait. All he did was wait. The class trip was coming up soon. Rome was a city of romance. Could he do something special for Lizzie then? He entered his house, went to his room, and flipped on his PC. He had a lot of research to do. This would be the summer Lizzie noticed him. But how? 

** How it happens? ** He didn't care, he knew today was taking him where he's meant to be. 

** A/N Another way to end this story. Why three endings? Because I felt like it... Uh, post your thoughts, then I'll post my reasons after... **

I like all three endings, but this is the most realistic. 

"All I Have To Do Is Dream" is by the Everly Brothers. 

Review or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net 

Thanks,   
JP 

May 2, 2003 


	25. FINAL Author's Note: Rants, Raves, Reaso...

**

FINAL Author's Note: Rants, Raves, Reasons, and Even MORE Thank You's 

  


--------------------------------------------------------------------- 

**

First off, if for some strange reason you came to this page, and skipped over ANY of the story, PLEASE go back and read the other parts first. 

Second, this is VERY long. I have been dubbed "The King of Author's Notes", and I guess this 'chapter' confirms it. 

Third, thanks to new reviewers since I posted the mega-list at the end of installment 20: Jillybean, smart-cookie, MsJML, Dreamcatcher, nightshadow67, Kami Potter (meaning they had never reviewed previous) 

Fourth, thanks to ALL readers, and ALL reviewers from the past ten weeks. If you review after this chapter, and you haven't before, thanks to you as well.

AH! The "King of Author's Notes" is back, one last time. Yep, this is the end. Any more posted will be in story #2, and beyond. I was planning to post this Saturday or Sunday, but life has been crazy of late. Also, if this is the last installment, I wanted it to cover everything. 

Why the alternate endings? Because as good as the first ending was, it is way off from where the movie took things. If I was to write more, it would be a) from this 'alternate universe' I created, b) far off in the future where things changed c) in the past before 'stuff' happened... Unless I made it a dream... 

I had that first 'dream' chapter ready two months and was going to post it as the first chapter of story #2, or as the 'real' ending to this story, but had no idea at the reaction my story would get. So I posted it as an 'alternate ending'. I created the second 'dream' two days before I posted it. Right now there are talks of a sequel movie, or a new series, but nothing solid. I don't HAVE to follow the way Di$ney writes things, but it's tough not to. Several authors here have stories that have conflicting plots, meaning one story cancels out another as being possible, unless you ignore the first.

When I started my story, I knew two things. 1) I wanted to invent a bigger reason for Miranda's absence 2) I wanted to extend what we saw in Bye, Bye, Hillridge Junior High. 

I wasn't really planning on taking the story THAT far, it just happened. When I wrote the first few chapters about Christmastime, not many questioned it, because none of that happened on the show. When I started re-covering ground that the show had done, I got complaints if I stuck to close to what the show had done, and complaints if I changed it. 

I never anticipated getting as much feedback as I recieved, both the good, and the bad. With every review, every email, I felt a little better. I even memorized the URL for the reviews, and checked it via my cell phone when away from my computer. A couple of people told me never to stop writing, one said they quoted lines from my story to their friends. Sorry friends! Kidding... What lines? 

This story is far from perfect. I used to get straight A's in English, but could have done a lot better in some places. One thing I'm surprised NO ONE complained about is that in Lizzie's thoughts about her body-switching with Matt, I referred to the mess that fell on Kate as baked beans, even though it's said about three times that it's chili. Funny looking chili, if you asked me. Most, if not all of you, probably thought/think the same. 

In some ways, I 'wrecked' a beautiful story, but I was at such a high point, what could I do for an encore? Even the second ending is impossible, though it shouldn't be. So now, I have three possible starting places for a new story, which I haven't written yet.. 

If you look at the last few chapters, there are hints of it being a dream. Many, but not all, are below, and not in any order. 

HINTS? 

Most of Lizzie's thoughts are just written out, not as "she thought" and "she wondered" and the like. Meaning they could be what Gordo wants her to think.

A long rambling part of a chapter devoted to a coffee spill. 

Lizzie suddenly being able to remember lyrics when it's stated before she doesn't pay attention to them much. 

Gordo intentionally aggrivating Miranda online. 

Gordo wanting to meet Lizzie in the park, a more public place, and then when she yells when he tries to keep her from leaving, no one hears her and tries to help? 

More pronouns, (He, She, They) and less "Lizzie, Gordo" in the story from chapter 13 on. Gordo is a better student than Lizzie, would use more 'proper' terminology. 

Things are much, much more detailed after 'the BBHJH kiss'. See previous clue. 

Mr. Dig popping up everywhere. Oh, wait, he does that already. 

Gordo suddenly can't talk but only sing when he meets Lizzie at the park? 

Gordo wouldn't want Lizzie to be bad, she tried to be bad in seventh grade, he and Miranda talked her out of it. 

She just gets a little upset when she thinks he kissed Kate, but goes ballistic when he says it was Miranda instead? Why? 

Did Kate have a crush on him, or does he just maybe wish she did? 

Suddenly, when he's explaining Miranda's problem, he can almost read her thoughts? Why couldn't before? Then he could see she liked him back, and he could have just admitted his feelings? 

Miranda, 14, can get into clubs twice? 

He DID tell Mr. Dig it was Parker who called him short. He didn't try to hide who it was so that Mr. Dig might think it was Lizzie he was referring to. 

He wouldn't get that mad at Lizzie for interrupting his story, it's not an easy story to hear. 

The little kids in the last chapter could be Lizzie and Gordo, and he's seeing how things were... 

Lizzie can't say she loves Gordo in return, because if it is a dream, he needs to hear it from her, not in a dream. 

QUESTIONS: If it's a dream how come he knows two things? 1) She was kissed by Aaron Carter, 2) Kate told her Gordo liked her during the murder mystery party. 

ANSWERS: Lizzie could have told Miranda, and she could have told Gordo in one of their 'chats'. 

If I write anymore from the standpoint that the last few parts are a dream, then it erases many things. Mainly, is that really Miranda's 'problem' or is it something different? 

I've read lots and lots of stories on here, and still think I have ideas that haven't been done before, but that story was a LOT of work. Some people on here juggle multiple stories, and they are all excellent. I don't think I could do that... 

I may start a new story tomorrow, I may never post another. I honestly don't know. I wrote this whole story ahead of time, then posted. It's too difficult for me to sit and try to figure out what to type without having at least 'some' ideas on paper... 

With all the new fans, this area of fanfiction.net is growing faster than before, and considering the amount of material here before the movie, that's amazing. This story will slowly slip down the pages, as more and more stories are created and updated. Please pass on the word about my story. Don't let it just sit here, and not get any more attention after it falls out of the first few listings... 

The two stories I've been asked to write are: 1) Miranda's side of this whole story, and 2) a continuation from where the movie left off. The first would be a real challenge, but would be interesting to try. Notice that Miranda wasn't really in this story much. No three way calls or anything. The second I will probably do, but there are plenty of 'continuation' fics already posted. most are very good. 

I covered a LOT of ground in this story, but a lot I skipped over. I STILL have yet to see about half of the first season. If the last few chapters ARE a dream, I could re-do a lot of what's written there. 

I started making a list of more songs for this story after I had written it, it previously only had about ten. The first list had roughly one hundred fifty songs, by story's end, it grew to two-fifty. I used just over fifty here, but a good deal of those 50+ I just named, or paraphased in chapter titles. If anyone wants to see the list, email me, and I'll forward it. If you have suggestions for possible additions, I'll look those over as well... 

If I was in the show's 'target range', I don't think I could have written a story like this, I probably wouldn't have even attempted it. I thank each of you for taking the time to read my story, and post your thoughts. There are other 'older' viewers, most don't want to admit it. Only about four people offline know that I've written this story, or that I'm a Lizzie-o-holic. 

I gave this story a 'PG' rating, and hope that was correct. Some parts could have been PG-13 but I censored myself a little. 

Some of this story is very personal. Things that happened to me, or that I tried to make happen. Sigh. One of my best friends said I look like Jack Osbourne, maybe that's what scares everyone away... 

If anyone has any suggestions or comments, or anything, you can IM me via MSN JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net Yahoo JP5683@yahoo.com AOL IM is JP five 683, but hardly ever use it. I have my Webtv address in my profile, but I don't use it much anymore. I LOVE my laptop. I respond to ALL email to my MSN address, but please, if you haven't emailed me before, at LEAST put 'Lizzie' or 'Fanfiction' or something like that somewhere in the subject line, so I don't accidentally delete your message. 

If you haven't, you should check the Lizzie McGuire message board at TVTome.com. Very informative, you have to register to post, but not to read. Also if you are looking for a good, active Lizzie Yahoogroup, check out hilarydufffans. (3 f's). 

Egg-stra special thanks to the following people, if you will, my personal 'top ten'. 

the Commster (thanks for checking out my story even though you didn't know much about the show. Guess you do now, huh? You're a great friend, wish you hadn't moved away from CA.) 

Sesen ObsdianMoon (always reviewing, always upbeat, a great author, and always replying to emails. You're tops, kid.) 

Jaime Sumner (You've been a great help, given great suggestions, and have been great to chat with. Thanks!) 

TheRealXenocide (You have a fantastic story here, even though it's wayyyy different than any other, and you helped a great deal in many aspects. Thanks.) 

TasChiBandGirl (Melissa, you too have been a great help. Made some great suggestions, reviewed your tail off, and answered email from this here nutcase as well. Go Diamondbacks! Go Red Sox! Go Devil Rays!) 

Keeponwritin (Carstairs, you didn't review much, but that's ok. With as many user id's as you have, I can understand you don't have a lot of time. You are a great author, and your posts at TVTome are nothing but interesting and entertaining! foofoofoofoofoo!) 

Rocio L. (I believe you were the first to add me to your favorite author list. Thanks for the honor, thanks for the reviews. If I ever meet Adam, I'll be sure to give him your email, k?) 

Rob. (I see you at TVTome, hilarydufffans, and here. You are a little too perky sometimes in your posts, but that's okay. You share lots of good info, and now you're helping with a great fansite.) 

Sally (You are probably the only person who reads all my posts. Thanks for all your help as well.) 

Steve (Even though you don't read fanfic, I'll thank you anyways. Thanks for the help with Microsoft Word, and all the info. I wish I could have met the LM cast like you. WHAAAAA!) 

If I left you off the above list, please don't think it means I think any less of you. There are hundreds of people posting on the five or six yahoogroups I'm in, the TVTome boards, Clayton Snyder's boards, Hilaryfan.com's boards, and here. Several of you have responded to my posts, emailed me, and helped a lot. I just can't list everyone here. Most of you were named in the previous author's note. 

I thank everyone who added me to their favorite author's list (ten, as of this posting) and everyone who added me to their favorite stories list. (No idea how many) I'll keep my support services active so when I post again, if I post again, you will know. 

Thanks also to all the incredible authors here at fanfiction.net. 

Simply, to everyone. THANK YOU!!!!!! 

If I could, I'd send you all a great big thank you card. You guys (and girls) are wonderful. 

Wow, I type as much as I talk. Guess I deserve the "King of the Author's Notes" title, huh? This story would probably be UNDER 50,000 words without all the notes. 

SO 

Signing off (for now),   
JP 

MSN IM JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net   
Yahoo IM: JP5683 JP5683@yahoo.com   
AOL IM: JP five 683   
Email: JP5683@msn.com JP5683@webtv.net 

What? Are you still reading this? Go review, or email me, or raid my favorite stories from my profile. That's it. The End. Finito. Game Over. Buh Bye. Estodo Muchos Gracias. Ya Estuvo. Fin. 

May 8, 2003 


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